Can a person give up their rights and not pay child support?

[gijanemommy]

What is the name of your state?Colorado
I have been paying child support for about 13 years now. When I lost my daughter to my aunt through her lies and manipulation of the judicial system, I was told that I still had parental rights and any major decisions had to be put to me first for my input. Since then, my aunt has moved around, told family members not to let me know where she was and never consulted me on anything. My daughter says that I deserted her and she hates me for it. Recently I have found out that my daughter is one of the most sexually active people in her town. She is out drinking and drugging on a daily basis and really has my aunt fooled. My daughter has told me to stay out of her life and she does not want any contact with me whatsoever. I have done my part by trying to find her on a constant basis and paid my child support. I am tired of being told that my daughter is like this because I am her mother. I want to know that if after all this time--- Can I give up the parental rights that were never really given to me and stop paying child support. I am really tired of not being able to get ahead because of having to pay child support for a daughter that I feel I have no chance of ever getting to know.

 

[StepmomsAreBest]

I have no advice, I just wanted you to know that I totally understand how you are feeling. My husband pisses away $200 a week for 3 children he doesn't even know. Alot of people don't understand how one could NOT want to support their children. They don't understand what it feels like to be PAS'd so badly that you know the neighbor kids better than you know your own.

 

[SITLYNNE]

I totally agree with you but also have no advice. You will be told by many not to give up on your child, one day she'll need her mom. You'll also be told that giving up your rights (that you actually don't have anyway) is no way to get out of paying support. I am in your shoes and feel helpless. I work 3 jobs to pay my support to a household with a total yearly income over $100,000. My sons were bribed, and brainwashed by their father and new stepmom and also hate me and say I abandoned them. This has been going for almost a year now and I feel it's hopeless. Everyone says not to give up, but its hard. I know exactly what you mean by knowing the neighbor kids more than your own. I actually go to the mall and look at all the kids, wondering if mine changed so much and I actually wouldn't recognize them. Just last week, while trying to speak with my 15 year old, he told me not to come to one of his function, he was purposely avoiding me, and that he felt uncomfortable around me because he never sees me anymore. This is his choice, not mine. He then hung up on me. Anyway, I just read today on this site that support may be suspended because of comtempt of visitation order. I'm going to try that, because in order to give up my rights, I'm understanding through this site, that stepmom has to adopt. NOT happening, as stated by their father, because then support stops. I'm not a part of their life in anyway. They do not let me excercise my rights anyway. Good luck and keep your chin up. It's all about $$.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

(QUOTE)Anyway, I just read today on this site that support may be suspended because of comtempt of visitation order. (QUOTE)

I don't know where you read that, but it is not true. I see everyone's pretty emotional on the issue, so I will only add this..............You brought these children into the world, and you are legally obligated to support them. Who else should support your children,.....Me? Think about it.

 

[StepmomsAreBest]

(QUOTE)Anyway, I just read today on this site that support may be suspended because of comtempt of visitation order. (QUOTE)

I don't know where you read that, but it is not true. I see everyone's pretty emotional on the issue, so I will only add this..............You brought these children into the world, and you are legally obligated to support them. Who else should support your children,.....Me? Think about it.

That's exactly right.....they DID bring these children into the world. Therefor they have every right to help parent them. Why is only their money good enough??? The CP's piss and moan about how the NCP needs to be responsible and pay child support. But nevermind the damage the CP is doing by robbing the child (for no good reason) the opportunity to know BOTH parents. Pretty ****ty IMO.

 

[StepmomsAreBest]

Also, if the courts, or whoever were REALLY looking out for the best interests of the children, YOU wouldn't be supporting these NCPs children. But unfortunately, it's all about greed. Piss on teaching the children about love and what a family is supposed to be. Lets just rape the NCP of every last dime no matter what the cost.

 

[dgingrich]

I am really sorry Stepmom that you think your husband is "pissing" away 200 a week on HIS children (Which I'm sure you knew about prior to marrying him, right)? If he has no relationship w/his children than he has nobody to blame but himself when it comes down to it. NOBODY would keep me from my child, NOBODY.

 

[StepmomsAreBest]

I am really sorry Stepmom that you think your husband is "pissing" away 200 a week on HIS children (Which I'm sure you knew about prior to marrying him, right)? If he has no relationship w/his children than he has nobody to blame but himself when it comes down to it. NOBODY would keep me from my child, NOBODY.

That's exactly what he's doing. Pissing it away. Yep. I knew all about his children when I married him, and I accepted that he had a life before me. The very day his ex found out about me, she started her "hide the kids" crap. She started changing the phone number and eventually leaving it unpublished so he couldn't get it. Plus she moved at least 3 times a year and left no forwarding address. So tell me, how does one exercise their visitation rights in a situation like that? You can never understand how a parent can just give up until you are put in that situation or watch someone you love go through it. I sat and watched my husband cry because he missed his children so badly. 8 years wasted. He will NEVER get that back! Those children are strangers to him. Don't try to justify that to me.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

That's exactly right.....they DID bring these children into the world. Therefor they have every right to help parent them. Why is only their money good enough??? The CP's piss and moan about how the NCP needs to be responsible and pay child support. But nevermind the damage the CP is doing by robbing the child (for no good reason) the opportunity to know BOTH parents. Pretty ****ty IMO.

Then tell your husband to be pro-active and take her to court for his damb visitation. What's keeping him? As another poster said, NOTHING would keep me from my children. He has rights, so don't attack me because he is not utilizing them.

 

[StepmomsAreBest]

Then tell your husband to be pro-active and take her to court for his damb visitation. What's keeping him? As another poster said, NOTHING would keep me from my children. He has rights, so don't attack me because he is not utilizing them.

Duh. You can't take her to court if you can't find her.

His "damn" visitation? Now that's classy. And a good example of the way these NCPs are treated.

 

[dgingrich]

I think if the children meant that much than hubby would hire a private eye to track them down and have mommy dearest served. And don't tell me you can't afford it because of the money he's pissing away every week. Tell him that if his kids are that important than he should be working 3 jobs to pay for a private eye. Nothing will be done unless he does something about it. How will he explain to his children that he just gave up?

 

[StepmomsAreBest]

I think if the children meant that much than hubby would hire a private eye to track them down and have mommy dearest served. And don't tell me you can't afford it because of the money he's pissing away every week. Tell him that if his kids are that important than he should be working 3 jobs to pay for a private eye. Nothing will be done unless he does something about it. How will he explain to his children that he just gave up?

Uh.....hello. My husband isn't stupid. What do you think is going to happen if he works 3 jobs. Duh. Child support will dig their greedy little claws in it. He already tried bringing in extra income. Only to have his CS increased because he was making more money. Ain't gonna happen again.
Don't you get it? H-E D-O-E-S N-O-T K-N-O-W H-I-S C-H-I-L-D-R-E-N. The desire to fight for them is GONE, as they are complete strangers to him now. As I said before, unless you have gone through this before, you can NEVER understand how a parent can get to the point of giving up.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

Duh. You can't take her to court if you can't find her.

His "damn" visitation? Now that's classy. And a good example of the way these NCPs are treated.

Stop whining, he had seven years to do this. And another thing, It's none of YOUR legal affair.

 

[stealth2]

All of which is hijacking this thread. Stepmomsarebest - if you want to discuss YOUR situation, go to your own thread. Same goes for the rest of you.

 

[StepmomsAreBest]

Stop whining, he had seven years to do this. And another thing, It's none of YOUR legal affair.

Bitter much?