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What is the name of your state? California

I had another thread that was locked regarding some child custody issues of a friend of mine at work.

His mediation was last Wednesday. Caught in her lies and deciepts by the mediator, she agreed verbally to 90/10 placement with dad...her getting 1st 3rd and 5th weekends, and 2 weeks uninterupted in the summer. (By the way, she is already saying she doesn't want to exercise her visitation this weekend.) This is temporary, supposedly until June (no date for that set yet) in order for her to (as the mediator said) try to repair her relationship with her children.

Oldest 3 have been told by their counselor and the mediator that they do not have to go to mom's if they don't want to. Mom is not fighting this.

Anyway, current temp order has my friend paying child support to her based on 50/50 placement of 5 kids. They have a court date set April 28th, which I guess is when they will ask for this continuance until June. My feeling is that the switch in placement is a change of circumstance, and his lawyer should be fighting for an immediate change in child support (at the new percentage she would actually owe him money). At the very least I would think that his current payments should stop at the very least (he is also paying arrears for the time between filing and when the child support amount was set). He is saying that his lawyer will probably ask for a change at the April court date. Is that normal? It just doesn't seem right that she continue to receive these payments, while he has to charge groceries to a credit card.
 


VeronicaGia

Senior Member
It is definitely a change in circumstances and your friend needs to file for a modification of support. However, until the court orders differently he needs to keep paying.

Also, unless a judge said the kids can choose whether or not the kids go for visitation, they must go if mom picks them up (or whatever other arrangements are made). Dad risks losing custody for denying visitation. Dad needs to buy a journal today and keep track of every second she spends with the kids and every second she doesn't bother getting the kids. A journal isn't proof, but it goes a long way to prove her lack of interest.

Remember, nothing can change a court order except a new court order. No verbal agreements, no written/notarized agreements, nothing. If he wants to keep the kids, he needs to take the order seriously.
 
He does, and he intends to keep paying. He drops the kids off at her times, she allows the older ones to come in and get stuff and leave with him. Honestly, with her, it really is just about the money, as sad as that sounds.

His attorney, the court mediator, and the counselors are all saying that the kids have a right at their age to decide whether or not to visit mom. Oldest hasn't been going for a few weeks now. Neither mom or her lawyer are fighting it. I know many people on this site have said he is in violation of the court order, but for whatever reason, even his attorney doesn't agree.

It is just me that thinks that his attorney should get something in front of the judge before this April 28th court date. Sounds like whatever channels it needs to go through though, that probably that is the soonest it would get in front of a judge anyway.
 

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