Child support and additional expenses

[Just Blue]

Give the seats back. Go to a GOOD Consignment Store and purchase GOOD used car seats.

Problem solved.

 

[CourtClerk]

He told me that he did not need them. I offered to take them out and leave them. He told me don't worry about it. But then after I already leave, he suddenly needs them. Emergency? If for some reason he HAD to leave, there are several other people in that house that could keep an eye on them. Especially since he told me "no, don't worry about it".

The comment "HIS babies'' what is that about? I never said my babies, his babies. They are our babies.

Right... I suppose if the house caught fire and they needed to leave the house, then someone else could stay in the house with the kids. If there was a natural gas leak and they needed to evacuate the neighborhood, someone could just stay at the house with the kids

 

[jones.rachel13]

You won't ask YOUR mom for help yet you were perfectly ok with letting HIS mom spend HER money on YOUR carseats?

It's not his mother, it's his grandmother! It is not my mothers responsibility to provide for my children. It is mine and his. That's not my problem that she wants to pick up his slack financially. If I were his grandmother, I would kick him out. He is 25, going on 26 years old. Has never held a stable job, no education. He sits at home all day or goes out with his friends, all while she hands him money on a daily basis, pays for his car, insurance, gas... etc. I know stupid me for getting involved with him, but that's in the past I can't change any of that now!

 

[Just Blue]

Give the seats back. Go to a GOOD Consignment Store and purchase GOOD used car seats.

Problem solved.

Today 11:03 AM
jones.rachel13 Quote:
Originally Posted by RRevak
You won't ask YOUR mom for help yet you were perfectly ok with letting HIS mom spend HER money on YOUR carseats?

It's not his mother, it's his grandmother! It is not my mothers responsibility to provide for my children. It is mine and his. That's not my problem that she wants to pick up his slack financially. If I were his grandmother, I would kick him out. He is 25, going on 26 years old. Has never held a stable job, no education. He sits at home all day or goes out with his friends, all while she hands him money on a daily basis, pays for his car, insurance, gas... etc. I know stupid me for getting involved with him, but that's in the past I can't change any of that now!

************************************************************************************

 

[jones.rachel13]

You are right, usually it does take years for someone to get penalized for not paying support. But in the county I live in, they don't mess around with it. After you miss 3 months, then the court starts coming after you. Like I said previously, he has another case pending against him that intertwines with this so I doubt they would let him off the hook for very long at all. Regardless, none of this has anything to do with my original question, thank you for your input though.

 

[mistoffolees]

Right... I suppose if the house caught fire and they needed to leave the house, then someone else could stay in the house with the kids.:roll eyes:

To be fair, if my house was on fire, lack of car seats wouldn't prevent me from getting the kids out.

Your point is a good one - both parents need to have car seats because there ARE times when it's necessary to take the kids somewhere, but your example isn't the best.

What about the other option - car seats go with the kids? It really doesn't take that long to remove and reinstall car seats once you get a little practice. When Mom drops the kids off with Dad, she leaves the car seats there for his use and vice versa. Solves the problem without either one having to spend any more money.

Although it DOES require them to act like adults - which might be a lot to ask.

 

[jones.rachel13]

To be fair, if my house was on fire, lack of car seats wouldn't prevent me from getting the kids out.

Your point is a good one - both parents need to have car seats because there ARE times when it's necessary to take the kids somewhere, but your example isn't the best.

What about the other option - car seats go with the kids? It really doesn't take that long to remove and reinstall car seats once you get a little practice. When Mom drops the kids off with Dad, she leaves the car seats there for his use and vice versa. Solves the problem without either one having to spend any more money.

Although it DOES require them to act like adults - which might be a lot to ask.

And that is what we have been doing, until now. All of a sudden they want them back because he got mad at me. Whether he had the kids 50% of the time or hardly ever at all (which is the case now) I do not see a point in buying an additional set of car seats especially when they are not the cheapest of things!

 

[CourtClerk]

I do not see a point in buying an additional set of car seats

After 3 pages of this you don't see the point?

There's no hope for you. When you don't marry the man and you choose not to be together...

YOU BUY TWO SETS OF EVERYTHING. ONE FOR YOUR HOUSE, ONE FOR HIM. There are no stupid little childish fights.

 

[Ohiogal]

First off, if she discontinues payments then he will be going to jail. I know she does not want that, so more than likely she will not.

In order to go to jail he would have to be wilfully not paying. If he is unemployed unvoluntarily then he is not wilfully not paying and will not go to jail.

He already has another case pending against him which we go to court for on the 14th of this month, so he has a huge paper trail following him and I highly doubt they are going to go "light" on him.

What type of case? Huge paper trail following him? Really?

On another note, my mom? What does my mother have to do with anything? I don't live off of others like he chooses to.

Yes you do. You expect grandma to pay his child support and grandma to provide you with car seats and leave dad without the car seats because you TOOK them.

I provide for myself and the babies on my own, with addition to the child support.

No you don't. Or you wouldn't have "took" the car seats that were given to the babies.

And quite honestly, $300/month for 2 babies is not a whole lot. That doesn't cover for even half of the actual expenses. Formula is about $250 alone! I do have the money for car seats, just not right now. Without car seats, I can not take them to the sitter so I can go to work. That is why I am wanting to know because when I go to pick them up, I want to know if they do end up calling the police, can they take them?

Boy are you selfish. The car seats should go with the children. If the children are with dad then dad should have the car seats. If you want more money, earn it. or next time get pregnant by a rich dude. Check his bank balance before you have sex.

 

[Ohiogal]

And that is what we have been doing, until now. All of a sudden they want them back because he got mad at me. Whether he had the kids 50% of the time or hardly ever at all (which is the case now) I do not see a point in buying an additional set of car seats especially when they are not the cheapest of things!

No, you haven't been acting like adults. YOU don't want to leave the car seats with the children. You don't want to buy the car seats because you are too cheap to buy them. You are whining about it like they are made of gold. Again, next time before you lift your skirt so some guy can nail you, CHECK HIS BANK BALANCE FIRST and make sure he has 100k in the bank, a job, a car and what not. That way you know you are with a guy who can support you.

 

[jones.rachel13]

After 3 pages of this you don't see the point?

There's no hope for you. When you don't marry the man and you choose not to be together...

YOU BUY TWO SETS OF EVERYTHING. ONE FOR YOUR HOUSE, ONE FOR HIM. There are no stupid little childish fights.

Thanks for being a complete jerk! In my case it would be 4 of everything! There are 2 babies! But like I've said for about the third time, he doesn't ever take them so why have any duplicates? Waste of money, especially when you aren't made of it!

 

[Ohiogal]

Thanks for being a complete jerk! In my case it would be 4 of everything! There are 2 babies! But like I've said for about the third time, he doesn't ever take them so why have any duplicates? Waste of money, especially when you aren't made of it!

You are the complete jerk. YOU buy two of everything and he buys two of everything. But hey, you are the one who chose to sleep with him. Again, check the bank balance before boffing next time. Get to know someone. Don't sell yourself so cheaply.

 

[GoodDadtoBK]

It is not uncommon for BOTH parents to have their own carseats, stroller, ect for the children. In fact, it is written in my cour torder that EACH parent is responsible to provide clothing and necessities while the child is with them.

While it may seem like a financial strain, YES, that does mean four of everything.

 

[jones.rachel13]

No, you haven't been acting like adults. YOU don't want to leave the car seats with the children. You don't want to buy the car seats because you are too cheap to buy them. You are whining about it like they are made of gold. Again, next time before you lift your skirt so some guy can nail you, CHECK HIS BANK BALANCE FIRST and make sure he has 100k in the bank, a job, a car and what not. That way you know you are with a guy who can support you.

That is where you have things completely WRONG! I didn't say I WON'T leave the car seats. I asked before I left, he said no don't worry about it. After I had already left his house and halfway to work, he tells me he needs them. The car seats are for the babies. They are not mine, his, or anyone elses besides theirs!
I also said this before, I can't change what has been done. Yes, I had kids with someone I shouldn't have but thats the past! Its done and over with, they are here. Also, I don't expect his grandmother to do anything! I expect him to! HE is the one that expects her to do it and she does it to keep him out of trouble because he is too lazy to find a job.

 

[jones.rachel13]

In order to go to jail he would have to be wilfully not paying. If he is unemployed unvoluntarily then he is not wilfully not paying and will not go to jail.



What type of case? Huge paper trail following him? Really?


Yes you do. You expect grandma to pay his child support and grandma to provide you with car seats and leave dad without the car seats because you TOOK them.


No you don't. Or you wouldn't have "took" the car seats that were given to the babies.



Boy are you selfish. The car seats should go with the children. If the children are with dad then dad should have the car seats. If you want more money, earn it. or next time get pregnant by a rich dude. Check his bank balance before you have sex.

He is unemployed VOLUNTARILY! I was unemployed 2 months before I gave birth and did not find a job until they were 8 months old! During that time, I did what I had to do to provide for them. Used up all of my savings and when that was gone, took out my 401k from my previous job! There are no excuses, especially none for being just flat out lazy! How does that make me selfish? That I don't want to have to buy another set of car seats if not needed, I would much rather share them where ever the kids go and that is what has been going on until now when they want them back. I am not cheap either but having 2 babies all on your own with a full time job and school, is not easy or cheap! I could go out and buy another set here in a few weeks but what am I to do in the meantime? And I just think its completely ridiculous on their part to want them back.