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  1. #1
    zobianna is offline Junior Member
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    child support and disability stipends

    What is the name of your state? Kentucky

    I am in a bind and need advice. I am the custodial parent(mother) of a 13 yr old son whose father I left 5 years ago after 30 years of domestic violence. The courts ordered my ex to pay $67.26 a week in child support to which his response was to pack up and leave town. After a couple of years of living on afdc and then my ssi benefits I got word my ex filed for disability and my son was entitled to a stipend. I spoke to a person at the social security office and they expedited the claim but also told me if I could get a court order seperate from the divorce decree i could have child support directly withheld from my ex's monthly check as they do not consider what my son receives child support as the absent parent isn't paying it they are. OK to make a long story short i went to the county atty who handles child support and they insisted this could not be done unless i swore out a warrant for non support which I did. Today they finally got him in court and his atty. went both barrels at me saying that the money my son got because of his fathers disability offsets what he owes because he got 6 months back pay and slightly more a month than the courts originally ordered for support. Who is right? Am I stupid to take this to court and ask them to force this man to be responsible for his child? Are there any printed legal briefs available in support of my belief that this stipend should not offset his responsibility to child support because if we were not divorced he would be entitled to it anyway? Oh and believe it or not he remarried which means he gets a monthly allotment for his new wife as well but still insists he owes nothing to his son. go figure.


    p.s. my son and i live below poverty level in one of the worse parts of town and get section 8 to help pay our rent . please tell me there is hope
  2. #2
    nicetryadmin Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by zobianna
    What is the name of your state? Kentucky

    I am in a bind and need advice. I am the custodial parent(mother) of a 13 yr old son whose father I left 5 years ago after 30 years of domestic violence. The courts ordered my ex to pay $67.26 a week in child support to which his response was to pack up and leave town. After a couple of years of living on afdc and then my ssi benefits I got word my ex filed for disability and my son was entitled to a stipend. I spoke to a person at the social security office and they expedited the claim but also told me if I could get a court order seperate from the divorce decree i could have child support directly withheld from my ex's monthly check as they do not consider what my son receives child support as the absent parent isn't paying it they are. OK to make a long story short i went to the county atty who handles child support and they insisted this could not be done unless i swore out a warrant for non support which I did. Today they finally got him in court and his atty. went both barrels at me saying that the money my son got because of his fathers disability offsets what he owes because he got 6 months back pay and slightly more a month than the courts originally ordered for support. Who is right? Am I stupid to take this to court and ask them to force this man to be responsible for his child? Are there any printed legal briefs available in support of my belief that this stipend should not offset his responsibility to child support because if we were not divorced he would be entitled to it anyway? Oh and believe it or not he remarried which means he gets a monthly allotment for his new wife as well but still insists he owes nothing to his son. go figure.


    p.s. my son and i live below poverty level in one of the worse parts of town and get section 8 to help pay our rent . please tell me there is hope
    So where was YOUR attorney in all of this?
  3. #3
    zobianna is offline Junior Member
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    well because the county atty collects child support in jefferson County KY they were there to represent me but the person they sent was unaware of the law and how it applied to this case so she had him plea guilty to misdemeanor non support for the time frame his atty said was not covered by the disability stipend. I wanted to get an atty of my own for the case even if it was a public defender but the County atty said i couldnt that it was their job to prosecute him. the sad part in all of this is i had to lie to my kid..he knew about the hearing ( he is almost 14 and not stupid) and asked how things went and had some questions about his father. the man never once asked how his son was doing yet to make my son feel better about himself i lied and told him his father did ask about him and how he was doing and said to tell him he loved and missed him. dont want to turn this into a soap opera but my kid went thru alot dealing with a father that skipped town and ignored him the past 5 years and to give him a little bit of peace was worth millions to me.
  4. #4
    nicetryadmin Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by zobianna
    well because the county atty collects child support in jefferson County KY they were there to represent me but the person they sent was unaware of the law and how it applied to this case so she had him plea guilty to misdemeanor non support for the time frame his atty said was not covered by the disability stipend. I wanted to get an atty of my own for the case even if it was a public defender but the County atty said i couldnt that it was their job to prosecute him. the sad part in all of this is i had to lie to my kid..he knew about the hearing ( he is almost 14 and not stupid) and asked how things went and had some questions about his father. the man never once asked how his son was doing yet to make my son feel better about himself i lied and told him his father did ask about him and how he was doing and said to tell him he loved and missed him. dont want to turn this into a soap opera but my kid went thru alot dealing with a father that skipped town and ignored him the past 5 years and to give him a little bit of peace was worth millions to me.
    Well your biggest mistake was allowing them to believe they were there to represent you. As you found out, you were misled.
  5. #5
    zobianna is offline Junior Member
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    yup and as they say hind sight is 20/20 but you learn from your mistakes...i am already trying to get an appt with legal aid. i also called social security who again reiterated that the modest stipend they pay is NOT considered child support as any child even a step child would be entitled to the funds. my next step is looking into case law to further strengthen my point. face it what sense is there in having an orderfor support if the feds have to pay it and it causes NO financial hardship on the non custodial parent? seems moot to me
  6. #6
    LdiJ is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by zobianna
    yup and as they say hind sight is 20/20 but you learn from your mistakes...i am already trying to get an appt with legal aid. i also called social security who again reiterated that the modest stipend they pay is NOT considered child support as any child even a step child would be entitled to the funds. my next step is looking into case law to further strengthen my point. face it what sense is there in having an orderfor support if the feds have to pay it and it causes NO financial hardship on the non custodial parent? seems moot to me
    It doesn't matter how Social Security view the funds. It matters how the state court judges view the funds.

    In most cases the courts view SSDI payments as a replacement for current child support. That however doesn't relieve your ex of his arrearages.

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