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child support laws?

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1saddad

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? texas
wife took children and hid for 15 yrs and now i am paying back child support.
wife asked courts not to enforce child suport order.
wife then went on public assitance for about 2 yrs and i am now paying all that back.
amount is over $30,000 of which over $10,000 is just interest and even the state of callifornia didnt know i supposidly owed it until i called in 2001 to ask how much i owed in child support and they told me .27 cents, then about a month later they told me i owed over$30,000!
anyone who can help me?What is the name of your state?
 


stealth2

Under the Radar Member
I dunno what help you're looking for. You're actually pretty lucky that the amount is as low as it is given the time elapsed. But the state is gonna want to be repaid, regardless.

Otherwise - what did you do to try and find your kids over the past 15 years?
 
1saddad said:
and even the state of callifornia didnt know i supposidly owed it until i called in 2001 to ask how much i owed in child support and they told me .27 cents, then about a month later they told me i owed over$30,000!
Did you pay the $0.27 after you called?
 

CandiceH

Member
I was wondering the SAME thing but I thought it would be too c@cky to ask....glad someone did. I would wonder the same thing as stealth too.....did he ever contact his children?! Even worse than not paying support is not being there for your child. Not illegal but not good :(
 

1saddad

Junior Member
contact

yes i did finally get to contact my children but it was after searching for yrs to find them!
i also paid the state the .27 cents that they told me i owed.
what i am wondering i why she is allowed to get away with taking the kids and hiding them from me for all those yrs and all i get is a bill?
no rights were trampled on here?
all i got after finally finding my children was 2 kids who thought of me as the one who abandoned them and that is absolutely not true!
i guess as a man i have no rights?
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Lose the "as a man" crap, okay? WHAT DID YOU DO TO FIND YOUR CHILDREN OVER THE PAST 15 YEARS?
 

1saddad

Junior Member
as a man?

sorry if that offended. i asked all my socalled friends and her relatives where she was with my children repeatedly but noone would tell where they were. i searched the internet and asked the county if they would tell me where she was at! they would not tell me even though there were no restraining orders or anything that would justify them not telling me they just said they couldnt and wouldnt tell me. so i continued searching everywhere i could think of but couldnt find them. finally found them using a paid search company.
 

CandiceH

Member
first of all, if you had a visitation order did you ever try filing for contempt? I would think that would be the first step. I know the past is the past but you cant b!tch about owing child support when you knew all along that you had that obligation. IMO - you should have went through the courts when they disappeared, if that is what occured. That would have been the first place I would have headed to.
 

BL

Senior Member
CandiceH said:
first of all, if you had a visitation order did you ever try filing for contempt? I would think that would be the first step. I know the past is the past but you cant b!tch about owing child support when you knew all along that you had that obligation. IMO - you should have went through the courts when they disappeared, if that is what occured. That would have been the first place I would have headed to.
Even if the poster filed contempt , He would have had to Find Her with the kids and have her served .

It sounds similar to my situation when it first happened and did not know what to do .

That said , Stealth is right , Legally . You have to be able to show the Court that there was in fact violation(s) , and two , prove to the Court your attempts to locate the Party , and demand your rights .

Asking friends and family isn't proof . I'm sure the poster now knows what He should have done in the first place now , unfortunately He will now have to pay , unless somehow He can appeal and prove to the Court his rights were violated for a time and get credit for it .
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
1saddad said:
sorry if that offended. i asked all my socalled friends and her relatives where she was with my children repeatedly but noone would tell where they were. i searched the internet and asked the county if they would tell me where she was at! they would not tell me even though there were no restraining orders or anything that would justify them not telling me they just said they couldnt and wouldnt tell me. so i continued searching everywhere i could think of but couldnt find them. finally found them using a paid search company.
I am sorry but I don't buy that. I am not saying that you made no effort at all, but its sounds to me like you made a half-hearted effort at best.

I would have moved heaven and earth in the first couple of years that my children were missing to find them and establish my rights. I would have worked three jobs if I had to to come up with the money to pay a PI and an attorney.

Your kids were missing for 15 years....I am sorry but I suspect that you spent some critical years just being glad that nobody was making you pay child support.
 

1saddad

Junior Member
maybe a little history would help.
our first child, died of brain cancer at the age of 3, and i had just gotten out of a hospital for a nervous breakdown after 6 months. i was living on social security disability payments.
That's when she decided to take off with the children.
 

1saddad

Junior Member
perhaps u should stay off my thread stealth
sounds like all u want to do is ridicule me and not give any help.
what part of that didnt u understand?
i am wondering if there is any way to see if i can find out if i can lower the payments or not have to pay for it since i was cheated, yes i said CHEATED! out of my rights as a father and i am asking if anyone can help not ridicule me for not being able to find my children, maybe u dont care about a fathers rights?
i lost not only my first son but lost all my children!
 

fairisfair

Senior Member
so, mom was COLLECTING BENEFITS all that time, and you were unable to find her ????

Of course, in the meantime you were putting the child support into an interest bearing account for the children, right?? or so that you would be able to pay the arrearages when and if mom ever resurfaced??

Um, sorry I ain't buying it.
 

BL

Senior Member
1saddad said:
perhaps u should stay off my thread stealth
sounds like all u want to do is ridicule me and not give any help.
what part of that didnt u understand?
i am wondering if there is any way to see if i can find out if i can lower the payments or not have to pay for it since i was cheated, yes i said CHEATED! out of my rights as a father and i am asking if anyone can help not ridicule me for not being able to find my children, maybe u dont care about a fathers rights?
i lost not only my first son but lost all my children!
1saddad , you have to understand , this is a Law Forum . Stealth is not getting on your case per say , but you do have to understand it has been 15 years , and not trying to " move heaven and Earth " as another poster suggested in that amount of time , would raise suspicions .

I missed out on most of my 3 children's growth , and now have communications with my Adult Children .

You have to understand , without clearly proving to the Court , you Demanded your rights from the Mother in ALL or Partially , in those 15 years , or proving She removed and hid them from you for that period of time against a specific Court Order until you found their whereabouts , you will NOT get ANY financial relief .
 

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