Child support for non married couples

[agogo]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arizona

My son is 9 years old and his mother and I split up 6 1/2 years ago. We never settled anything in court. There was no written agreement that was signed. We just came up with a mutual agreement on how we would deal with him. Up until recently he would be with her 5 days a week and I would have him on the weekends. We would split the cost of his expenses, ie: medical, insurance, school etc...I would give her money every month. For the most part everything worked out fine, a few disagreements here and there, but it has generally worked out. My question is, can she come after me for back child support or can she still come after me for child support? CAn she come after me for custody? He is with me most of the time now. What is Arizona law regarding this?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arizona

My son is 9 years old and his mother and I split up 6 1/2 years ago. We never settled anything in court. There was no written agreement that was signed. We just came up with a mutual agreement on how we would deal with him. Up until recently he would be with her 5 days a week and I would have him on the weekends. We would split the cost of his expenses, ie: medical, insurance, school etc...I would give her money every month. For the most part everything worked out fine, a few disagreements here and there, but it has generally worked out. My question is, can she come after me for back child support or can she still come after me for child support? CAn she come after me for custody? He is with me most of the time now. What is Arizona law regarding this?

Until a court says otherwise she is the only one with any kind of legal custody. Yes, she could file for child support at any point up until he turns 18. You could also file to establish primary custody, and if you won, file for child support. In other words, nothing is cast in concrete until the child becomes a legal adult.

Why do you feel that you need to do this now, if the two of you have co-parented amicably for 9 years? What is the story? Court orders are normally best because they protect all parties.

 

[sandyclaus]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arizona

My son is 9 years old and his mother and I split up 6 1/2 years ago. We never settled anything in court. There was no written agreement that was signed. We just came up with a mutual agreement on how we would deal with him. Up until recently he would be with her 5 days a week and I would have him on the weekends. We would split the cost of his expenses, ie: medical, insurance, school etc...I would give her money every month. For the most part everything worked out fine, a few disagreements here and there, but it has generally worked out. My question is, can she come after me for back child support or can she still come after me for child support? CAn she come after me for custody? He is with me most of the time now. What is Arizona law regarding this?

Generally, NO. One cannot file for retroactive child support. If she seeks a court order for support, they would usually only go back to the date of filing and no further, except in very limited circumstances (which I don't believe exist in Arizona).

As for custody, legally, the mother has sole legal and physical custody rights to the child born outside of marriage. Unless and until there is a court order that says otherwise, she gets to make all decisions regarding that child. At this point, she can legally come and take the child away from you any time, as without that court order, you HAVE no legal right to custody and/or visitation.

If you want to protect your future parenting interests, I would suggest that you and Mom come up with a written custody and parenting plan, and file it with the courts so that a judge can issue a formal order. You can do that yourself, or you could hire a family law attorney to prepare the plan for you and have the judge sign it.

 

[agogo]

Until a court says otherwise she is the only one with any kind of legal custody. Yes, she could file for child support at any point up until he turns 18. You could also file to establish primary custody, and if you won, file for child support. In other words, nothing is cast in concrete until the child becomes a legal adult.

Why do you feel that you need to do this now, if the two of you have co-parented amicably for 9 years? What is the story? Court orders are normally best because they protect all parties.

I'm in a serious relationship, the first one since the ex and I have been apart, and my girlfriend wants me to take care of all this stuff legally. I try telling her that it's worked out fine, for the most part, up until now, but she wants me to do this because she doesn't like the way my ex has handled certain situations. It's understandable, but I don't want to present a legal battle to someone when there's no need to especially if she has more power than I do. Thanks for your reply.

 

[stealth2]

I'm in a serious relationship, the first one since the ex and I have been apart, and my girlfriend wants me to take care of all this stuff legally. I try telling her that it's worked out fine, for the most part, up until now, but she wants me to do this because she doesn't like the way my ex has handled certain situations. It's understandable, but I don't want to present a legal battle to someone when there's no need to especially if she has more power than I do. Thanks for your reply.

I would suggest to your g/f that this is YOUR situation, and she can either take or leave how YOU handle it. It really is none of her business.

 

[ecmst12]

Generally, court orders do protect everyone. But you need to tell your girlfriend to mind her own business and not to get involved in the relationship between you and your child's mother. She shouldn't even be forming an opinion about how you are handling things with your child. She needs to learn her place now, before she makes things ugly.

 

[LdiJ]

I'm in a serious relationship, the first one since the ex and I have been apart, and my girlfriend wants me to take care of all this stuff legally. I try telling her that it's worked out fine, for the most part, up until now, but she wants me to do this because she doesn't like the way my ex has handled certain situations. It's understandable, but I don't want to present a legal battle to someone when there's no need to especially if she has more power than I do. Thanks for your reply.

If you let your girlfriend control the situation regarding you, your child, and your child's mother its a recipe for disaster. You have no idea how many well meaning new significant others have destroyed good co-parenting relationships. Nip this in the bud now. It is not your girlfriend's place to like or dislike anything about how you and your ex handle things.