Credit to Arrears When I have the Kids

[2Mistakes]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Mississippi

Hello all! I have a question, and it's a little confusing so I'll try to explain as best I can.

OK, I have physical custody of mine and my exwife's 3 kids. Regarding child support, she is ordered to pay $900 per month, with $450 being due the 1st of each month and $450 being due the 15th of each month. She is currently in arrears in the amount of $2,950.

The exact wording of the order is as follows:
"The parties have agreed that (exwife) does not have to pay child support for periods that she has the children for an uninterrupted period of 7 days or more. Child support during that time shall be prorated according to the following calculation:

1. $900 divided by total # of days in the month being prorated = X
2. X times # of days being prorated (# of days (exwife) has the minor children during that month) = Y
3. $900 minus Y = Z
Z= amount of child support payable by (exwife) to (me) for that month."

Example: IF she had the kids from July 1-July 20, the calculation would be:
$900/31 = $29
$29 X 20 = $580
$900 - $580 = $320
$320 is the amount she would have to pay me for July.

Her summer visitation is ordered as follows:
"(Exwife) shall have the children for summer visitation beginning on June 24th at 6 pm and ending at 6 pm on the date that is 1 week prior to the children starting the new school year. The parties have agreed that it is in the children's best interest to be home for the week prior to school beginning."

This year, school starts August 4th, so her visitation would have been June 24th to July 28th.

She lives 8 hours away, and because of her work schedule, she won't have the kids at all this summer. (Not downing her for it, gotta do what ya gotta do to pay the bills.)

She and I spoke at the end of June, and she said she was going to try to get the kids on July 1st and keep them for a few weeks. She said that when she did that, she would still send the full amount of child support for July (even though it should/would be prorated) and the extra above the proration would go towards her $2950 arrears balance. Cool. I was fine with that.

July 1st came and went and I didn't hear from her about getting the kids. She emailed me late last week and said that because of work and the distance, she's not going to be able to get the kids at all this summer. Neither of us mentioned child support.

I got a payment of $450 from her today, and the memo says "back support." Because she isn't getting the kids, I am crediting it to current support that is due on the 15th. Leaving her arrears balance still at $2950. I emailed her about it so we would be on the same page.

She responded that because this is her court-ordered visitation time, she should get a proration whether she has the kids or not and wants the whole $450 and the $450 she sent on the 1st to be credited to her arrears. She said that leaves an arrears balance of $2050.

I think our order is specific and clear that she only gets a proration when she actually has the kids for 7 days or more, not when she's SUPPOSED to have them.

Which of us is interpreting the order correctly?

 

[CSO286]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Mississippi

Hello all! I have a question, and it's a little confusing so I'll try to explain as best I can.

OK, I have physical custody of mine and my exwife's 3 kids. Regarding child support, she is ordered to pay $900 per month, with $450 being due the 1st of each month and $450 being due the 15th of each month. She is currently in arrears in the amount of $2,950.

The exact wording of the order is as follows:
"The parties have agreed that (exwife) does not have to pay child support for periods that she has the children for an uninterrupted period of 7 days or more. Child support during that time shall be prorated according to the following calculation:

1. $900 divided by total # of days in the month being prorated = X
2. X times # of days being prorated (# of days (exwife) has the minor children during that month) = Y
3. $900 minus Y = Z
Z= amount of child support payable by (exwife) to (me) for that month."

Example: IF she had the kids from July 1-July 20, the calculation would be:
$900/31 = $29
$29 X 20 = $580
$900 - $580 = $320
$320 is the amount she would have to pay me for July.

Her summer visitation is ordered as follows:
"(Exwife) shall have the children for summer visitation beginning on June 24th at 6 pm and ending at 6 pm on the date that is 1 week prior to the children starting the new school year. The parties have agreed that it is in the children's best interest to be home for the week prior to school beginning."

This year, school starts August 4th, so her visitation would have been June 24th to July 28th.

She lives 8 hours away, and because of her work schedule, she won't have the kids at all this summer. (Not downing her for it, gotta do what ya gotta do to pay the bills.)

She and I spoke at the end of June, and she said she was going to try to get the kids on July 1st and keep them for a few weeks. She said that when she did that, she would still send the full amount of child support for July (even though it should/would be prorated) and the extra above the proration would go towards her $2950 arrears balance. Cool. I was fine with that.

July 1st came and went and I didn't hear from her about getting the kids. She emailed me late last week and said that because of work and the distance, she's not going to be able to get the kids at all this summer. Neither of us mentioned child support.

I got a payment of $450 from her today, and the memo says "back support." Because she isn't getting the kids, I am crediting it to current support that is due on the 15th. Leaving her arrears balance still at $2950. I emailed her about it so we would be on the same page.

She responded that because this is her court-ordered visitation time, she should get a proration whether she has the kids or not and wants the whole $450 and the $450 she sent on the 1st to be credited to her arrears. She said that leaves an arrears balance of $2050.

I think our order is specific and clear that she only gets a proration when she actually has the kids for 7 days or more, not when she's SUPPOSED to have them.

Which of us is interpreting the order correctly?

Based on the bolded--I would say that you are interpreting the court order correctly. In order for mom the get the support abatement, the kids have to be with her for 7 or more days.

 

[2Mistakes]

Thanks. That's what I thought too.

She had also mentioned at 1 point having the kids go stay with some of her family for her visitation time. I was fine with that. It's her time and she can do what she wants on her time, including letting them stay with grandparents/aunts. If she had done that, I was still going to give her the credit to the arrears for payments she made during that time, since the kids wouldn't be here.

But they are here, eating food, using electricity, etc.

What should I do legally about this specific situation? I haven't filed contempt for the arrears because she's gotten this far in the hole before, but always catches up, so I know she'll make good on it eventually.

As a side note, I don't understand why she's in arrears this much. I happen to know that she is making $10,460 PER MONTH. (I know this because she accidentally emailed me her paystubs for the the last 3 months. I think she was trying to email them to her accountant, who has the same first name as me. My guess is that she clicked on the wrong contact when composing the email.) But I guess I don't have to understand why she's so far in arrears when she is making that much. What she does is none of my business.

But that brings up another question. IF I decided to file contempt for the arrears, should I print those paystubs for the court? Would the judge likely see her non-payment as willful considering how much she makes?

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

LEGALLY, she has to have the children in HER possession, or with someone that SHE gives them to, for her to get the credit. My X wanted to try that trick too. She's wrong; you are correct.

How long before you decide to go for contempt on the arrearage?

 

[2Mistakes]

LEGALLY, she has to have the children in HER possession, or with someone that SHE gives them to, for her to get the credit. My X wanted to try that trick too. She's wrong; you are correct.

Thanks. Technically SHE wouldn't have been giving them to family. I would have been taking them to her dad's. But I was still going to give her the CS credit since they would be with her family. To do otherwise would have been splitting hairs, and totally not a hill to die on when we've been getting along so well.

How long before you decide to go for contempt on the arrearage?

I don't really know. Since 2009, things have been so amicable (and almost friendly) between us that I'm hesitant to rock that boat. I know if I file, things will go to hell in a handbasket quickly. I know it's in the kids' best interests to see us getting along so well, and I know that if I file, she will talk to them about it. BTDT with her. So I'm stuck between deciding do I go with what is good for the kids (not filing and not rocking the boat), or filing and persuing the money that I need from her. I still do believe that she will make good on it, at some point. She's been paying current support regularly since May. The arrears are from January-April (some payments were partial.) She just hasn't been paying any extra to go to the arrears. But I also wonder that if I continue to not push the issue of the arrears, I'll become complacent, and she'll think that I really don't need it or something like that.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Nothing like in the wording back to her that she is mistaken in her interpretation - that she actually has to HAVE the children to get credit that you pose the question as to when she feels she'll get caught back up on the support.

 

[2Mistakes]

Nothing like in the wording back to her that she is mistaken in her interpretation - that she actually has to HAVE the children to get credit that you pose the question as to when she feels she'll get caught back up on the support.

When I sent the initial email I explained why I wasn't applying it to the arrears (nicely of course )

I suppose another email is in order, maybe quoting the specific language in our court order.

She has mentioned the arrears in our communication and has acknowledged them, saying she knows she owes me money and will pay it as soon as she can. So I haven't asked. I think because I know how much she's making, it irks me a little more than if I didn't know. I feel like saying look, you make over $10,000 a month. Why can't you get caught up?!?! But then again, I don't know what her expenses are, and that's none of my business.

I do know that all of that is W-2 income, so no business expenses are coming out.

 

[LdiJ]

When I sent the initial email I explained why I wasn't applying it to the arrears (nicely of course )

I suppose another email is in order, maybe quoting the specific language in our court order.

She has mentioned the arrears in our communication and has acknowledged them, saying she knows she owes me money and will pay it as soon as she can. So I haven't asked. I think because I know how much she's making, it irks me a little more than if I didn't know. I feel like saying look, you make over $10,000 a month. Why can't you get caught up?!?! But then again, I don't know what her expenses are, and that's none of my business.

I do know that all of that is W-2 income, so no business expenses are coming out.

You could simply point out to her that the whole reason for her getting the reduction in child support is that she would be covering alot of the children's expenses while they were with her (or her family) and therefore if the children are not with her or her family she doesn't get the reduction. Suggest that she consult with her attorney to verify that.

Or, you can leave it be for now. Wait until she is almost caught up and deal with it then.

However, I do agree that if she makes over 10k a month and her child support is only 900.00 a month its pretty ridiculous that she is behind at all.

 

[2Mistakes]

You could simply point out to her that the whole reason for her getting the reduction in child support is that she would be covering alot of the children's expenses while they were with her (or her family) and therefore if the children are not with her or her family she doesn't get the reduction. Suggest that she consult with her attorney to verify that.

Or, you can leave it be for now. Wait until she is almost caught up and deal with it then.

However, I do agree that if she makes over 10k a month and her child support is only 900.00 a month its pretty ridiculous that she is behind at all.

Thanks. I emailed her back basically telling her that and attached the spreadsheet that I use to account for her payments. She emailed me back that she can open the attachment, but can't read the email (that it all looks like Chinese symbols) so I guess I will call her tomorrow. It's just hard to actually get a word in edge-wise with her.

Interestingly enough, she called my wife this afternoon and talked to her for over an hour. 2 months ago she decided (for no reason that I could discern) that she would not speak to my wife about anything. My wife has never overstepped, so it was just kinda weird. My wife was fine with it though. The only time my wife talked to her anyways was when the ex inititated the contact and would ask my wife stuff about the kids' daily lives.

So anyways, she called my wife today to see if she can get the kids for a week from the 22nd to the 29th. My wife knew I would have no problem with that, so she said sure. My wife didn't bring up the child support issue because she said it's none of her business and she doesn't want to be in the middle of it. The ex did tell my wife that she is going to work as many days and claims as she can because she wants to pay off her car and credit cards. My personal opinion is that CS comes first, and then you can pay off your other debts. But that's just me....

Then the ex went on to tell my wife all about her new boyfriend and her plans to move to CO with him. It was just weird. She even said that maybe my wife could fly out there for a visit and going skiing with her.

As far as the child support for July, she has already paid all of July (well, she thinks it went to arrears, but it really went to current July support.) So I will tell her that she can deduct $203 from the August 1st payment to account for the week she will have them.

Hopefully she'll understand the reasoning behind why both July payments went to July support and not credit to the arrears. If she wants to pay the whole $450 on August 1st, I'll credit the $203 to arrears.

 

[2Mistakes]

As a side note, I am so glad that when we modified our order in 2009, we put in language about long distance visitation. She was about 8 hours away at that time, but would sometimes stay with family in Pensacola and have the kids visit her there.

The order says that if she will be exercising visitation within 150 miles of our home, I (or another competent adult that I choose) have to meet her 1/2 way, and the specific meeting location is specified. If she will be exercising visitation more than 150 miles from our home, she is responsible for all transportation/costs.

And it's very specific as to dates for holidays, summer, etc, so we shouldn't have any problems with her move and vistation issues. I hope. I'll even give extra time if I don't have plans since she'll be living so far away.

I thank God every day that my wife is so smart. She actually wrote the agreement (my ex doesn't know that, she thinks I did) and really did a good job at not leaving gray area and making it as specific as possible.

 

[TheGeekess]

Check your PMs.

 

[2Mistakes]

Check your PMs.

Done.
________

 

[2Mistakes]

Update

So, the ex called me today to discuss this child support issue. I started explaining it to her, and she said, "Please just have (my wife) call me and explain it."

So I asked my wife if she wanted to, and she said sure, I'll give it a try but if an argument starts, I'm handing you the phone.

So my wife called her, explained why I think ex shouldn't get arrears credit for July when I've had the kids, and the ex said yeah, that makes perfect sense.

So all's well that ends well. With this situation, anyways. We'll see if she starts to pay down the $2,950 arrears anytime soon....