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Custodial Parent Moving Out of State Without Our Child

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meczam

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

Exwife has custody of our daughter, soon to be 18. Child support is payable in NY through age 21 unless an emancipation event occurs.

Exwife has announced her intentions to move from NY to North Carolina within the next year, our daughter will be over 18 by then. It's my understanding that there is no 'custody' persay once a child reaches 18 in NY, that it's only a matter of appearing before the support magistrate and confirming that the child no longer lives with the custodial parent.

There are a few possible scenarios but the most likely is that my exwife will set up our daughter in an apartment in upstate NY before she moves away, because she wants to attend college near her sister who lives there. However, my daughter has dropped out of High School and although she says she will take the GED next year, nothing is certain.

While I do intend to consult with an attorney when and if my exwife's out of state move occurs, I'd like to know how this process works. Assuming my daughter is living in an apartment in upstate NY, and is not enrolled in college, how do I go about making a case for vacating the child support order. In other words, how do I prove my exwife lives out of state and my daughter no longer resides with her? Is this situation sufficient grounds to vacate a child support order? Does there have to be a full fledged hearing or is it just a matter of me appearing before the magistrate and explaining the situation?

What if my daughter does enroll in college subsequently, how does this factor into the equation? For what it's worth I do intend to assist my daughter with living expenses, and college related expenses "if" she gets her GED and attends college, otherwise she's welcome to live with me if she chooses, but I will not pay for her to live in an apartment somewhere without any plans to go back to school or obtain employment (its rather difficult to get a job without having at least a HS diploma).

She and I have had an on again/off again relationship and she had lived with me for about a year but ultimately moved back with her mom. She does not plan to move with her mother to North Carolina, and as I said she has the option to live with me but if it was up to her she'd rather live in her own apartment, even if she's got no plans for school or employment. It's her belief, fostered by my exwife, that I will still be responsible for child support that her mom "says" she will continue to collect from me and then send to her for the next 3 years. The amount is over $3000 per month, which is far more than what her living expenses would be in that part of the state.
 


single317dad

Senior Member
General info:

https://www.childsupport.ny.gov/dcse/non_custodial_parent_info.html

More specific to your question:

http://www.nycourts.gov/courts/nyc/family/faqs_support.shtml

http://www.lawny.org/index.php/family-self-help-140/other-family-law-self-help-75/142-emancipation

It's up to you, if the child is living on her own, to ask that the court emancipate her and end your support obligation. The way the laws are worded, it seems that if Mom actually is sending those support payments back to the daughter to pay rent and bills, she'd still fall under "supported by a parent" and not be emancipated. An experienced NY family law attorney would be able to best advise you on that point, though.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
General info:

https://www.childsupport.ny.gov/dcse/non_custodial_parent_info.html

More specific to your question:

http://www.nycourts.gov/courts/nyc/family/faqs_support.shtml

http://www.lawny.org/index.php/family-self-help-140/other-family-law-self-help-75/142-emancipation

It's up to you, if the child is living on her own, to ask that the court emancipate her and end your support obligation. The way the laws are worded, it seems that if Mom actually is sending those support payments back to the daughter to pay rent and bills, she'd still fall under "supported by a parent" and not be emancipated. An experienced NY family law attorney would be able to best advise you on that point, though.
I specifically agree with this advice and the recommendation to speak to a local attorney. NY's laws on this issue are significantly different than the rest of the country, and if mom is using the child support to support the child living independently, only an NY attorney could tell you for certain if you could emancipate her. I am not even certain if mom would have to send ALL of the support to the child, if mom was using some of it to pay for her needs directly (think, cell phone, car insurance, health insurance, or anything else that mom might be paying directly).

So please do get a consult with a local attorney. If your child support is 3k a month, paying for an hour or so of an attorney's time would be a smart investment.
 

meczam

Junior Member
Ok, thanks for the fast responses and great advice.

I do intend to seek the advice of an attorney when and if the time comes.
 

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