What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NC
2001
Unfit mother, drug addict, leaving the child with anyone who will watch him including having him in 2 daycares 1st shift and 3rd where he slept on a cot every night. Thats if she had him, most of the time he was dropped off at my husbands parents house and left him for weeks at a time. We found out what was really going on ( he was 3 ) and threatened to report her to DSS so he came to live with us.
She rarely showed up to get him on her weekends, and if she did she would show up at 9pm on Saturday and bring him back at noon on Sunday (She lived an 1.5 away) While he was living with us, she filed for Welfare who in turn came after us for support!!! We went to court an 1.5 hrs from our home to explain the story, and she was found guilty of welfare fraud. Needless to say, she soon stopped calling or coming to get the child.
About a year after her disappearance, we decided to file for CS but of course no one knew where she was, so they put the info in the system but told us there wasnt much they could do without a location and its not as if she had a job to find her with.
2008
7 years with no word from her at all..She shows up the day AFTER the childs bday, about 7pm on a Monday, with a gift bag like nothing ever happened!!! Shes claiming how shes changed and grown up over the last 7 years. My husband told her to get off of our property before he called the police. She said I am his mother you cant keep him from me! I said, uhm No your not, I AM!! I raised him, I supported him, I love him and he calls me MOM. He hasnt asked for you since you left. Your a serrogate, a donor, not a mother. he couldnt pick you out of a line up, you are a stranger and you have no one to blame but your self. She told US we better get a good lawyer and squeeled tires out of our driveway (Changed huh?). WE got one, and found out that during her disappearing act she filed for Custody (so she could commit some more welfare fraud) and was awarded it because we were never served so we didnt know! She gave them an address that was over 5 years old, that she KNEW wasnt correct.
We went to court, told our story and were granted FULL custody. The judge ordered a Psych evaluation, a HAIR follicle drug test, Mandatory AA meetings 3 times a week and NO tolerance for anything, even alcohol. If she did all of that...MAYBE she could have 1 hour every other week of supervised visitation in our home. We got a copy of the Evaluation stating that Shes been a drug addict since she was 14 and been on everything you can think of, Cocain, Meth, Crack, Pain Killers, Ecstacy, etc etc. She was arrested several times trying to sell drugs, ordered to long term treatment which she did not complete on 2 ocassions, running away each time. When they found her she had to do 9 months in jail. She was homeless, jobless and running the streets of California. (of course NC CS couldnt find her!)
She now claims to have been sober for 2 years (Really, so why didnt you contact the child before now?) Because its a LIE, as usual. Yet, this court appointed psychologist comes to the conclusion that she is FIT to become a parent to this child...WTF????? Really??? Am I being punked??? She sits with this pathalogical LIAR for a couple of hours during an interview and takes her statements as FACT.
She had 6 months to do the hair follicle test, its been over a year and she never took it (But shes been sober for 2 years) She hasnt gone to the mandatory AA/NA and she was ordered to pay a measly $114 a MONTH in CS...She said she doesnt make much money and lives with her step mother and they dont have much money. We were not granted any backpay for the last 7 years, she paid 3 very late payments, sent us 3 bad checks then never sent another payment again. Its been a Year since the order and she is 9 months behind!!! Our lawyer called to tell us that she quit her job as a waitress because she is pregnant and thats why she hasnt been paying CS.
So once again, she has absolutely NO regard for the child, and is having another when she cant even support herself, or the child she abandoned 8 years ago. Shes not married, quit her job, and lives with her step mother.
Im sorry this was soooo long but I wanted to paint as much as the picture as I could. Please, someone explain to me WHY she is allowed to do whatever she wants with no consequences. She abandoned the child, didnt pay any support for 8 years, doesnt pay whats ordered now. Cost us thousands in legal fees and hasnt done anything the judge ordered. But shes pregnant again.
If the tables were turned my husband would be in jail...NO Doubt about it.
He was never married or had any real relationship with this deadbeat. He was young, we were broken up and he made a mistake. Yet, while we were broken up back in 1997 he paid me $100 a week in CS, at 20 yrs old and when he got one month behind the judge told him to get another job if he couldnt afford his cs! But No one will make her pay a measly $114 a month. Give me a break!
He stepped up and did the right thing, yet here we are..... Seems as if the deadbeat Mother has all the rights when it comes to the law and we have NONE. When will the courts treat Deadbeat, Unfit mothers in the same manner that they do men?
2001
Unfit mother, drug addict, leaving the child with anyone who will watch him including having him in 2 daycares 1st shift and 3rd where he slept on a cot every night. Thats if she had him, most of the time he was dropped off at my husbands parents house and left him for weeks at a time. We found out what was really going on ( he was 3 ) and threatened to report her to DSS so he came to live with us.
She rarely showed up to get him on her weekends, and if she did she would show up at 9pm on Saturday and bring him back at noon on Sunday (She lived an 1.5 away) While he was living with us, she filed for Welfare who in turn came after us for support!!! We went to court an 1.5 hrs from our home to explain the story, and she was found guilty of welfare fraud. Needless to say, she soon stopped calling or coming to get the child.
About a year after her disappearance, we decided to file for CS but of course no one knew where she was, so they put the info in the system but told us there wasnt much they could do without a location and its not as if she had a job to find her with.
2008
7 years with no word from her at all..She shows up the day AFTER the childs bday, about 7pm on a Monday, with a gift bag like nothing ever happened!!! Shes claiming how shes changed and grown up over the last 7 years. My husband told her to get off of our property before he called the police. She said I am his mother you cant keep him from me! I said, uhm No your not, I AM!! I raised him, I supported him, I love him and he calls me MOM. He hasnt asked for you since you left. Your a serrogate, a donor, not a mother. he couldnt pick you out of a line up, you are a stranger and you have no one to blame but your self. She told US we better get a good lawyer and squeeled tires out of our driveway (Changed huh?). WE got one, and found out that during her disappearing act she filed for Custody (so she could commit some more welfare fraud) and was awarded it because we were never served so we didnt know! She gave them an address that was over 5 years old, that she KNEW wasnt correct.
We went to court, told our story and were granted FULL custody. The judge ordered a Psych evaluation, a HAIR follicle drug test, Mandatory AA meetings 3 times a week and NO tolerance for anything, even alcohol. If she did all of that...MAYBE she could have 1 hour every other week of supervised visitation in our home. We got a copy of the Evaluation stating that Shes been a drug addict since she was 14 and been on everything you can think of, Cocain, Meth, Crack, Pain Killers, Ecstacy, etc etc. She was arrested several times trying to sell drugs, ordered to long term treatment which she did not complete on 2 ocassions, running away each time. When they found her she had to do 9 months in jail. She was homeless, jobless and running the streets of California. (of course NC CS couldnt find her!)
She now claims to have been sober for 2 years (Really, so why didnt you contact the child before now?) Because its a LIE, as usual. Yet, this court appointed psychologist comes to the conclusion that she is FIT to become a parent to this child...WTF????? Really??? Am I being punked??? She sits with this pathalogical LIAR for a couple of hours during an interview and takes her statements as FACT.
She had 6 months to do the hair follicle test, its been over a year and she never took it (But shes been sober for 2 years) She hasnt gone to the mandatory AA/NA and she was ordered to pay a measly $114 a MONTH in CS...She said she doesnt make much money and lives with her step mother and they dont have much money. We were not granted any backpay for the last 7 years, she paid 3 very late payments, sent us 3 bad checks then never sent another payment again. Its been a Year since the order and she is 9 months behind!!! Our lawyer called to tell us that she quit her job as a waitress because she is pregnant and thats why she hasnt been paying CS.
So once again, she has absolutely NO regard for the child, and is having another when she cant even support herself, or the child she abandoned 8 years ago. Shes not married, quit her job, and lives with her step mother.
Im sorry this was soooo long but I wanted to paint as much as the picture as I could. Please, someone explain to me WHY she is allowed to do whatever she wants with no consequences. She abandoned the child, didnt pay any support for 8 years, doesnt pay whats ordered now. Cost us thousands in legal fees and hasnt done anything the judge ordered. But shes pregnant again.
If the tables were turned my husband would be in jail...NO Doubt about it.
He was never married or had any real relationship with this deadbeat. He was young, we were broken up and he made a mistake. Yet, while we were broken up back in 1997 he paid me $100 a week in CS, at 20 yrs old and when he got one month behind the judge told him to get another job if he couldnt afford his cs! But No one will make her pay a measly $114 a month. Give me a break!
He stepped up and did the right thing, yet here we are..... Seems as if the deadbeat Mother has all the rights when it comes to the law and we have NONE. When will the courts treat Deadbeat, Unfit mothers in the same manner that they do men?