• FreeAdvice has a new Terms of Service and Privacy Policy, effective May 25, 2018.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our Terms of Service and use of cookies.

didnt change support order when custody changed.

Accident - Bankruptcy - Criminal Law / DUI - Business - Consumer - Employment - Family - Immigration - Real Estate - Tax - Traffic - Wills   Please click a topic or scroll down for more.

fred2625

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Indiana..
Long story but got divorced and wife got custody. i was paying support for about a year then ex-wife brought kids to live with me and moved. I never went after her for support because she never worked and even stayed in a couple homeless shelters. (heres where it gets tricky)
she had another kid from someone else and while collecting welfair on that child she found that court still showed her as having custody of my children so she collected on them too.
eighteen years later i got a letter from the Elkhart Co. stating that I owed 70,000 in back child support.
went to court with ex-wife, court went through each school year asking her if she had custody and she said no.
they dropped my back child support down from 70,000 to about 16,000 because now there still giving her all the summer months.
The children never lived with her in the summers and she even says that she will admit that to that court, in fact she says that she has allready tried to tell them that.
Both her and the children ( who are both in there late 20s now) will state that they were in my costody the whole time.
I just want to know if there is some kind of form that we can fill out to fix this.
The big problem is im sure elkhart co wants there money back that my ex got from wellfair that whole time. but That should be between them and her
 


Isis1

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Indiana..
Long story but got divorced and wife got custody. i was paying support for about a year then ex-wife brought kids to live with me and moved. I never went after her for support because she never worked and even stayed in a couple homeless shelters. (heres where it gets tricky)
she had another kid from someone else and while collecting welfair on that child she found that court still showed her as having custody of my children so she collected on them too.
eighteen years later i got a letter from the Elkhart Co. stating that I owed 70,000 in back child support.
went to court with ex-wife, court went through each school year asking her if she had custody and she said no.
they dropped my back child support down from 70,000 to about 16,000 because now there still giving her all the summer months.
The children never lived with her in the summers and she even says that she will admit that to that court, in fact she says that she has allready tried to tell them that.
Both her and the children ( who are both in there late 20s now) will state that they were in my costody the whole time.
I just want to know if there is some kind of form that we can fill out to fix this.
The big problem is im sure elkhart co wants there money back that my ex got from wellfair that whole time. but That should be between them and her
okay...let me see if i can get our residential CSO (child support officer) to respond.

from what it looks like, mom committed some sort of welfare fraud collecting welfare benefits on behalf of the two children living with you.

because the state is owed, she can't waive the arrears.

now, i'm not sure if you have access to this information, but i'd want to make sure this third child is not listing you as responsible and the appropriate father is being held accountable. that may be the math mix up.

but mom would have to go on record as having to commit fraud for the county to pull those arrears and collect from her. and if she is still receiving assistance on her third child....they may not.
 

fred2625

Junior Member
i believe her kids are all grown up

okay...let me see if i can get our residential CSO (child support officer) to respond.

from what it looks like, mom committed some sort of welfare fraud collecting welfare benefits on behalf of the two children living with you.

because the state is owed, she can't waive the arrears.

now, i'm not sure if you have access to this information, but i'd want to make sure this third child is not listing you as responsible and the appropriate father is being held accountable. that may be the math mix up.

but mom would have to go on record as having to commit fraud for the county to pull those arrears and collect from her. and if she is still receiving assistance on her third child....they may not.
her other kids are all grown. I have to go to court on the 8th because they havent received my last few payments (garnishment didnt get through to them) and im going to try to explain it to the judge
 

fred2625

Junior Member
I talked to judge

I was in court today(discussing payments).I tried to explain again that the kids were in my custody. the judge said that I had to bring my x-wife to court in order for her to stop order. I talked to my x-wife and she said she would go with me to my next court day (set for sept.) and tell the court that they were with me and not her. What I want to know is if there is another way for her to let the court know without waiting till Sept. Is there something she can fill out in front of a notary and take to the court herself or something.
We did already try something like that back in 1990. she wrote a note explaining that she was giving custody to me and support should stop. she sighed it in front of notary, and i took it to the court and they filed it. for sixteen years I never got anything that would even make me think that there was still a support order against me.
 

fred2625

Junior Member
I was only 21 then. I didn't know. in fact I thought i was on top of things when i made her sign letter in front of notary.
 

fred2625

Junior Member
I think. Doesn't having her write note in front of notary prove that its her that wrote it? (sorry it keeps taking me long to reply to questions, were having storm out here and power keeps going out)
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
I think. Doesn't having her write note in front of notary prove that its her that wrote it? (sorry it keeps taking me long to reply to questions, were having storm out here and power keeps going out)
All it does is prove that the person who signed it is who they said they are. Period. It is not a legally enforceable document, contract, etc. It really is nearly worthless.
 
Last edited:

fred2625

Junior Member
I'm understanding that now.
But either way if the kids were living with me should I still owe? I know If she was trying to fight it the notary signed note wouldnt help me much but shes not. when we filed the letter we were both thinking that it was enough.
Nothing changes the fact that the children were living with me and I was paying 100% of the costs of raising them for fifteen years without getting a dime from her. Owing her money now after all that is just wrong even if I didn't file something right.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I'm understanding that now.
But either way if the kids were living with me should I still owe? I know If she was trying to fight it the notary signed note wouldnt help me much but shes not. when we filed the letter we were both thinking that it was enough.
Nothing changes the fact that the children were living with me and I was paying 100% of the costs of raising them for fifteen years without getting a dime from her. Owing her money now after all that is just wrong even if I didn't file something right.
You don't actually owe her any money. You owe the state for money she received from welfare. She isn't going to see any of it. I agree that its still an unfair situation for you, but that is the downside of not doing things the proper way.
 

fred2625

Junior Member
actually only $4,082.22 is owed to state (witch they say my tax checks go to) the other $12,229.00 goes to her (my weekly garnishment). If I can stop the rest Im even willing to pay what goes to state.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
actually only $4,082.22 is owed to state (witch they say my tax checks go to) the other $12,229.00 goes to her (my weekly garnishment). If I can stop the rest Im even willing to pay what goes to state.
If that is the case, she has the legal ability to forgive those arrears that are to go to her.
 

fred2625

Junior Member
Thank you for taking the time to reply to my posts, You are being very helpful.
what would be the quick and easiest way for her to do that?
( didn't mean quick and easy because Im sure it wont be, but is there a form I can get to her to help her get it started?)
 
Last edited:

Isis1

Senior Member
Thank you for taking the time to reply to my posts, You are being very helpful.
what would be the quick and easiest way for her to do that?
( didn't mean quick and easy because Im sure it wont be, but is there a form I can get to her to help her get it started?)
if she can legally forgive her portion of the the arrears, then you can draw up a stipulation with both of your signatures and submit that to the court for signature.
 

Find the Right Lawyer for Your Legal Issue!

Fast, Free, and Confidential
data-ad-format="auto">
Top