Ex Wants Child Support for Grown Children

[witness1]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia
A relative was incarcerated for 17 years when his children were 5 and 12. He and his wife cared for them prior to his going to prison. His wife re-married while he was in prison. He has been out of prison for almost 4 years and is now married and his ex has now filed for back child support. Their kids are now ages 22 and 29. It is obviously not easy to find a good-paying job with a felony on your record. It’s even difficult for the perfect citizen these days to find a job. He did find a job but was laid off earlier this year and this has caused a hardship for him. He was just asked back to his job a week ago. He is really struggling. What can he do to avoid trouble with the court system concerning this child support matter? He has no money and is barely making it himself. While I realize the ex-wife has a right to file for back support, it’s not like the kids need milk and pampers. They are grown with children of their own. [The real issue is the ex can’t stand that he is married to someone else knowing full well he is struggling.] Does this father have any legal rights to at least put a hold on this until he can get a little more financially secure if ever? He was so stressed when he lost his job and now finally got that back a week ago and to be faced with child support now -- at this time -- when he is barely making it himself. What can he do? He is a good guy. He loves his children. He just does not have any money and had relied on relatives to help him with his rent after losing his job. He and his wife can barely pay rent and a car payment. He received a letter threatening to take his drivers license if he doesn't come up with over $300 a month. No financial statement was ever requested. How could he ever get to work to make the little that he does get? Is there a lawyer out there that can help him? He really is a good guy who made a mistake that he paid for and now just needs a chance to get on his feet. He's not like most dead-beat dads out there. He just needs a chance to get on his feet. HE NEVER NEGLECTED HIS CHILDREN PRIOR TO INCARCERATION. He has no problem paying. He just doesn't have it under the circumstances.

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia
A relative was incarcerated for 17 years when his children were 5 and 12. He and his wife cared for them prior to his going to prison. His wife re-married while he was in prison. He has been out of prison for almost 4 years and is now married and his ex has now filed for back child support. Their kids are now ages 22 and 29. It is obviously not easy to find a good-paying job with a felony on your record. It’s even difficult for the perfect citizen these days to find a job. He did find a job but was laid off earlier this year and this has caused a hardship for him. He was just asked back to his job a week ago. He is really struggling. What can he do to avoid trouble with the court system concerning this child support matter? He has no money and is barely making it himself. While I realize the ex-wife has a right to file for back support, it’s not like the kids need milk and pampers. They are grown with children of their own. [The real issue is the ex can’t stand that he is married to someone else knowing full well he is struggling.] Does this father have any legal rights to at least put a hold on this until he can get a little more financially secure if ever? He was so stressed when he lost his job and now finally got that back a week ago and to be faced with child support now -- at this time -- when he is barely making it himself. What can he do? He is a good guy. He loves his children. He just does not have any money and had relied on relatives to help him with his rent after losing his job. He and his wife can barely pay rent and a car payment. He received a letter threatening to take his drivers license if he doesn't come up with over $300 a month. No financial statement was ever requested. How could he ever get to work to make the little that he does get? Is there a lawyer out there that can help him? He really is a good guy who made a mistake that he paid for and now just needs a chance to get on his feet. He's not like most dead-beat dads out there. He just needs a chance to get on his feet.

Here is the problem -- he made a choice -- a felony. That didn't change the fact that he had two children that were entitled to his support and that he was legally obligated to support. The current support ended correct? So he is just dealing with arrears? He may end up losing his license due to the choices he made.

 

[Gracie3787]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia
A relative was incarcerated for 17 years when his children were 5 and 12. He and his wife cared for them prior to his going to prison. His wife re-married while he was in prison. He has been out of prison for almost 4 years and is now married and his ex has now filed for back child support. Their kids are now ages 22 and 29. It is obviously not easy to find a good-paying job with a felony on your record. It’s even difficult for the perfect citizen these days to find a job. He did find a job but was laid off earlier this year and this has caused a hardship for him. He was just asked back to his job a week ago. He is really struggling. What can he do to avoid trouble with the court system concerning this child support matter? He has no money and is barely making it himself. While I realize the ex-wife has a right to file for back support, it’s not like the kids need milk and pampers. They are grown with children of their own. [The real issue is the ex can’t stand that he is married to someone else knowing full well he is struggling.] Does this father have any legal rights to at least put a hold on this until he can get a little more financially secure if ever? He was so stressed when he lost his job and now finally got that back a week ago and to be faced with child support now -- at this time -- when he is barely making it himself. What can he do? He is a good guy. He loves his children. He just does not have any money and had relied on relatives to help him with his rent after losing his job. He and his wife can barely pay rent and a car payment. He received a letter threatening to take his drivers license if he doesn't come up with over $300 a month. No financial statement was ever requested. How could he ever get to work to make the little that he does get? Is there a lawyer out there that can help him? He really is a good guy who made a mistake that he paid for and now just needs a chance to get on his feet. He's not like most dead-beat dads out there. He just needs a chance to get on his feet.

Your post is a good example as to why a third party posting isn't going to get the right help.

Have your relative post himself.
One of the things that we need to know is, was there ever a court order for CS?
Or, was there an order where the court reserved on the issue of CS?

Your relative needs to read his court order and post the EXACT wording,(of course, leaving out the names), so that we may help him.

 

[witness1]

I posted this for him because it's difficult for him to do so as he drives a truck. There has never ever been a court order. He was married, was with his wife and children prior to going to jail. He supported his family prior to going to jail. There were never child support payments ordered. There is no exact wording of a court order to quote from. What he has is a letter from Child Support Enforcement that is telling him that he needs to pay a certain amount of money or they are threatening to take his driver's license. They never asked for financial information so it's interesting how they derive at a certain figure. What I know is that he was incarcerated for 17 years making $800 a year. He has been out for almost 4 years with steady work for half that time. I will have him post a reply so that you may help him. Thanks.

 

[LdiJ]

I posted this for him because it's difficult for him to do so as he drives a truck. There has never ever been a court order. He was married, was with his wife and children prior to going to jail. He supported his family prior to going to jail. There were never child support payments ordered. There is no exact wording of a court order to quote from. What he has is a letter from Child Support Enforcement that is telling him that he needs to pay a certain amount of money or they are threatening to take his driver's license. They never asked for financial information so it's interesting how they derive at a certain figure. What I know is that he was incarcerated for 17 years making $800 a year. He has been out for almost 4 years with steady work for half that time. I will have him post a reply so that you may help him. Thanks.

Its possible that mom was receiving state aid (tanif, foodstamps, medicaid, section 8 housing) while dad was in jail. If so, the state could be coming after dad now for reimbursement of a portion of that aid. If that is what is going on mom likely has absolutely nothing to do with it, and won't see a penny of any money he is ordered to pay.

Its also possible that a child support order was done and dad doesn't know it...and these are arrearages that they are going after.

 

[Gracie3787]

I posted this for him because it's difficult for him to do so as he drives a truck. There has never ever been a court order. He was married, was with his wife and children prior to going to jail. He supported his family prior to going to jail. There were never child support payments ordered. There is no exact wording of a court order to quote from. What he has is a letter from Child Support Enforcement that is telling him that he needs to pay a certain amount of money or they are threatening to take his driver's license. They never asked for financial information so it's interesting how they derive at a certain figure. What I know is that he was incarcerated for 17 years making $800 a year. He has been out for almost 4 years with steady work for half that time. I will have him post a reply so that you may help him. Thanks.

He was divorced, correct?

There must be something regarding CS in his divorce decree. Even CSE agencies cannot simply notify a person that they owe CS, there had to have been an order issued at one point or another.

It will help if he locates his divorce decree before posting.

 

[stealth2]

Its possible that mom was receiving state aid (tanif, foodstamps, medicaid, section 8 housing) while dad was in jail. If so, the state could be coming after dad now for reimbursement of a portion of that aid. If that is what is going on mom likely has absolutely nothing to do with it, and won't see a penny of any money he is ordered to pay.

Its also possible that a child support order was done and dad doesn't know it...and these are arrearages that they are going after.

That's what I was thinking - state aid.