Closed Thread
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 33
  1. #1
    legalissues is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    9

    fathers rights for unborn child

    What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?undefined
    I am in NY state
    My boyfriend found out that his exgirlfriend is pregnant with his kid. She is furious that he had been seeing me b/c she wants to be with him (basically tried to trap him into being w/her by having this kid). So now she has told him that if she finds out he is speaking to me or seeing me she will take off from NY to florida where her family is and have the kid there. He now wants to cut ties w/me until he figures out his legal rights. Can she really have this much control over his life? What does he need to do to make sure he cant take the kid away from him and can continue seeing me? Does he really need to do whatever she says until the baby is born?
  2. #2
    brisgirl825 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Broom closet
    Posts
    2,376
    Until the kid is born, mom is in charge. In fact until paternity is established, after the baby is born, mom is in charge.
    So yes, mom can leave.
  3. #3
    legalissues is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    9

    paternity

    In continuing my question..My boyfriends exgirlfirend had documents w/ DNA/blood test results confirmed that the unborn child is my boyfriends. So does that help at all to prevent his X from moving from NY (where we all currently are) to Florida? I mean is it really that he does what she wants and gets back w/her and leaves me is the only way for him to keep this kid in NY since that is what she is telling him? I am just trying to get to the bottom and see if she can really control his life like this, or if I am being given the run around and am hanging around for no reason. I mean its beyond sad that this woman is having this kid to trap him, but is there nothing that can be done to stop it?
  4. #4
    kat1963 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Virginia
    Posts
    1,939
    She claims to have had a DNA test done already? How?
    KAT
  5. #5
    brisgirl825 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Broom closet
    Posts
    2,376
    Quote Originally Posted by legalissues
    In continuing my question..My boyfriends exgirlfirend had documents w/ DNA/blood test results confirmed that the unborn child is my boyfriends. So does that help at all to prevent his X from moving from NY (where we all currently are) to Florida? I mean is it really that he does what she wants and gets back w/her and leaves me is the only way for him to keep this kid in NY since that is what she is telling him? I am just trying to get to the bottom and see if she can really control his life like this, or if I am being given the run around and am hanging around for no reason. I mean its beyond sad that this woman is having this kid to trap him, but is there nothing that can be done to stop it?
    He has no rights until: 1. A baby is born and 2. Until a court adjudicates him as the father of the child. Dad cannot control mom b/c she is pg.
  6. #6
    brisgirl825 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Broom closet
    Posts
    2,376
    Quote Originally Posted by kat1963
    She claims to have had a DNA test done already? How?
    KAT

    It can be done via amnio and cvs. Although it is risky and stupid.
  7. #7
    Zephyr is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Funkytowwwwwn
    Posts
    9,043
    and when did dad submit his dna sample for the test?
  8. #8
    kat1963 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Virginia
    Posts
    1,939
    I know HOW it can be done. I was just interested on hearing how biomom claims she made it happen.
    KAT
  9. #9
    Zephyr is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Funkytowwwwwn
    Posts
    9,043
    and if he is proven to be the child's father even though the child is not yet born, doesn't that then open the door to allow him to start proceedings now?


    and op is there a reason you and dad can't keep your relationship quiet until all of this is settled?
  10. #10
    legalissues is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    9

    details are sketchy

    Hi thanks for all your help. It is a bizarre story, and unfortunately all the details have not come easy. And I was just trying to decipher what was BS. As to why we cant keep our relationship low key...she had been calling me, and emailing, and texting me like crazy trying to find out if him and I were still together. He wanted to tell her we werent b/c she is unstable and was worried she'd show up at my door. Apparently he didnt take her seriously when she showed up a month ago saying she was pregnant. Then last wk I was told she showed up with proof, Im not quite sure what this proof was and was just shocked. All I was told was that she was watching everything he did and had parked herself in his apartment (she lives down the street) claiming that she was going to ruin his chances of being a part ofthis kids life if we continued things. I got the feeling he either was going to have to go back to her or not be as big of a part of this kids life as he wanted, and was trying to decide what I should do if this "control" he told me she had on him was real.
  11. #11
    Zephyr is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Funkytowwwwwn
    Posts
    9,043
    Quote Originally Posted by legalissues
    Hi thanks for all your help. It is a bizarre story, and unfortunately all the details have not come easy. And I was just trying to decipher what was BS. As to why we cant keep our relationship low key...she had been calling me, and emailing, and texting me like crazy trying to find out if him and I were still together. He wanted to tell her we werent b/c she is unstable and was worried she'd show up at my door. Apparently he didnt take her seriously when she showed up a month ago saying she was pregnant. Then last wk I was told she showed up with proof, Im not quite sure what this proof was and was just shocked. All I was told was that she was watching everything he did and had parked herself in his apartment (she lives down the street) claiming that she was going to ruin his chances of being a part ofthis kids life if we continued things. I got the feeling he either was going to have to go back to her or not be as big of a part of this kids life as he wanted, and was trying to decide what I should do if this "control" he told me she had on him was real.


    If I were YOU- I would RUN, this is going to be an ongoing emotional roller coaster
  12. #12
    legalissues is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    9

    running

    Quote Originally Posted by Zephyr
    If I were YOU- I would RUN, this is going to be an ongoing emotional roller coaster
    Thanks, I had a feeling that was what I was going to have to do. Very unfortunate. Thanks so much for your help and have a happy holiday!
  13. #13
    brisgirl825 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Broom closet
    Posts
    2,376
    Quote Originally Posted by legalissues
    Thanks, I had a feeling that was what I was going to have to do. Very unfortunate. Thanks so much for your help and have a happy holiday!

    You said "holidays". I love it!

    You should not feel like being with a guy who has kids isn't a good thing. There are some times when you know that the relationship will always be in turmoil b/c of an ex. It's not a bad thing to think about what YOU need from a relationship.
  14. #14
    rmet4nzkx is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Posts
    17,787
    This question is not about the rights of the father of an unborn child, it is about how you can hold on to your boyfriend and I think you are seeing first hand that you have no rights to hold him, have already lost him and to do so is a big mistake. The problem is whether or not any of the story is true about her being pregnant, having him proved the father through CVS or amnio both of which only have about a 2 % risk of miscarriage and the fact that he can file with the court for paternity and keep her there, if nay of it is true, he will be a part of that child's and her life for the next 21 years. You already have a good idea how reliable he is by his actions here and the fact that he cheated on her with you.

    Change the locks, change your email addy, change your phone number and move to FL when your lease is up, don't look back and hope your birth control method was good.
  15. #15
    legalissues is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    9

    kids

    Quote Originally Posted by brisgirl825
    You said "holidays". I love it!

    You should not feel like being with a guy who has kids isn't a good thing. There are some times when you know that the relationship will always be in turmoil b/c of an ex. It's not a bad thing to think about what YOU need from a relationship.
    I wasnt going to run out the door w/the new kid issue. But we havent been together that long, and the fact that he didnt tell me right away when he found out she might be pregnant is worrying me that perhaps he hasnt been 100% honest w/me all along, but being that I didnt know the legal issues I wanted to check before I decided what I was going to do. I just didnt want to kid myself that it is legal issues keeping him at her beckon call right now and that maybe he is gonna get back with her if she really had all the power and I was going to end up sitting here being supportive for no reason. Ugh! Thanks again.

Similar Threads

  1. Married fathers rights to unborn child
    By tsullivan67 in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 11-04-2010, 07:01 PM
  2. unborn child, fathers rights
    By Theodorewolfe in forum Child Support
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 09-07-2010, 01:43 PM
  3. Unborn child fathers rights
    By gotwood in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 08-13-2010, 06:57 PM
  4. UnBorn Baby, Fathers Rights?!
    By RyansSister in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 02-01-2005, 01:42 PM
  5. rights to unborn child
    By roberta655 in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 05-08-2001, 10:33 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

© 1995-2012 Advice Company, All Rights Reserved

FreeAdvice® has been providing millions of consumers with outstanding advice, free, since 1995. While not a substitute for personal advice from a licensed professional, it is available AS IS, subject to our Disclaimer and Terms & Conditions Of Use.