What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TN
My ex and I have an 11 year old daughter. We became parents when we were both 16 years old. Long story short, we didn't stay together after our daughter was born and, for the first 5 years of her life, we never went to court to set up child support/visitation. I was at her mercy whenever I wanted to see our daughter, which was rare. I was young and had no idea what my rights were as a father and didn't know what to do as far as going to court was concerned. So, we left it as is and I saw my daughter whenever my ex let me and I wasn't paying any child support.
When our daughter was 5 years old, my ex took me to court to set up child support and visitation. She had an attorney, I didn't. I didn't really know what to expect, I just wanted to make sure I could see my daughter on a consistant basis.
She got everything she asked for by default because I didn't contest anything. I didn't know I could. As far as child support goes, which is where my question comes in, she asked the judge for retroactive child support back to the day of my daughter's birth. I didn't contest it, so she was awarded 5 years of child support based on what I was earning back then. Obviously, I couldn't pay it all at once, so the judge set up a monthly payment plan, which I'm still paying on to this day.
I've been told that it's not really the norm to have child support retroactive to the date of birth, usually it's only back to the date the motion was filed. And, since no child support order had been in place, I wasn't legally obligated to pay anything. It doesn't seem right to me to have to pay her back for something that was never in place to begin with.
Besides my ex forgiving the arrears herself (which she won't), is there any way a judge would forgive them?
My ex and I have an 11 year old daughter. We became parents when we were both 16 years old. Long story short, we didn't stay together after our daughter was born and, for the first 5 years of her life, we never went to court to set up child support/visitation. I was at her mercy whenever I wanted to see our daughter, which was rare. I was young and had no idea what my rights were as a father and didn't know what to do as far as going to court was concerned. So, we left it as is and I saw my daughter whenever my ex let me and I wasn't paying any child support.
When our daughter was 5 years old, my ex took me to court to set up child support and visitation. She had an attorney, I didn't. I didn't really know what to expect, I just wanted to make sure I could see my daughter on a consistant basis.
She got everything she asked for by default because I didn't contest anything. I didn't know I could. As far as child support goes, which is where my question comes in, she asked the judge for retroactive child support back to the day of my daughter's birth. I didn't contest it, so she was awarded 5 years of child support based on what I was earning back then. Obviously, I couldn't pay it all at once, so the judge set up a monthly payment plan, which I'm still paying on to this day.
I've been told that it's not really the norm to have child support retroactive to the date of birth, usually it's only back to the date the motion was filed. And, since no child support order had been in place, I wasn't legally obligated to pay anything. It doesn't seem right to me to have to pay her back for something that was never in place to begin with.
Besides my ex forgiving the arrears herself (which she won't), is there any way a judge would forgive them?
