Help!!!

[wife w/question]

What is the name of your state? Texas
My husband's ex wife is a drug addict. She pretty much gave their son to my father-in-law and his wife (who hates my husband with a passion). My husband had a really good job at the time and they set the child support at his current pay rate, which that was fine. About 6 months ago my husband quit his job due to safety reasons (please keep in mind that he did NOT quit that job because of child support. he paid his child support like clock work for 2 1/2 years)
Anyway, we have tried and tried over and over agin to get the attorney General to lower the child support and they refuse. We are now $10,000 behind. I know that is an awful lot but remember his child support was set at $658.00 a month. It don't take long to build up. He went to court the other day and his step mom was pushing for him to go to jail, thank God, he didn't put not only did they raise his child support another hundred dollars, but he is now on probation. My husband is not a deadbeat dad. What can we do to convince the court? We have no money to pay an attorney, what can we do to get the payments lowered. I know that child is not hurting for anything. His grandparents are rich, I mean come on, give me a break all they are doing is spoiling that child. My husband has no problem paying child support but we cannot afford $800.00 a month. Who can?? What can we do to get it lowered? We can't afford a lawyer.

 

[SecondWifeAZ]

Hello fellow wife,

Your not alone. Stay strong.
I am not a lawyer..sorry!

I do have a question. Dose the birth mother pay child support to the grandparents?

 

[wife w/question]

yes she is supposed to, but don't. $100.00 a month. Who hoo

 

[Phnx02]

What is the name of your state? Texas
My husband's ex wife is a drug addict. She pretty much gave their son to my father-in-law and his wife (who hates my husband with a passion). My husband had a really good job at the time and they set the child support at his current pay rate, which that was fine. About 6 months ago my husband quit his job due to safety reasons (please keep in mind that he did NOT quit that job because of child support. he paid his child support like clock work for 2 1/2 years)
Anyway, we have tried and tried over and over agin to get the attorney General to lower the child support and they refuse. We are now $10,000 behind. I know that is an awful lot but remember his child support was set at $658.00 a month. It don't take long to build up. He went to court the other day and his step mom was pushing for him to go to jail, thank God, he didn't put not only did they raise his child support another hundred dollars, but he is now on probation. My husband is not a deadbeat dad. What can we do to convince the court? We have no money to pay an attorney, what can we do to get the payments lowered. I know that child is not hurting for anything. His grandparents are rich, I mean come on, give me a break all they are doing is spoiling that child. My husband has no problem paying child support but we cannot afford $800.00 a month. Who can?? What can we do to get it lowered? We can't afford a lawyer.

You are probably not getting a break because your husband voluntarily quit his job. Safety reasons or not, it's not smart to quit a job when you don't have another one lined up....... especially when you have children to support. Contrary to your belief, your husband is a deadbeat. He's gone over a year in not supporting his child and you seem to justify this as okay since the grandparents are doing it instead. Feeding and clothing your step-son is not their responsibility - whether they have the money to do so is irrelevant. It is a parent's duty.....BOTH parents duty....to support their children - not anyone else's.

 

[wife w/question]

I guess you are right in a sence, but first of all it has only been 6 months, I know it probably don't matter to you but information like that is very important to me. In his defence, we have tried to call and check on him to see if he needs anything or whatever, but they never answer the phone, I guess they are scared we are going to want to see him. Even when he was paying they would not allow visitations. But I can understand why you feel the way you do and I don't blame you, because when someone don't really understand the whole thing it's kinda hard to see. Everyone is subject to their own oppinion.

If you witnessed a co-worker get his arm ripped off be a running machine, and the supervisor wanted you to perfom the same task 5 minutes after the paramedics left, I do honestly belive you would quit too. Job or no job. The fathers life is more important than his money.

 

[SuzieWahoozie]

If he has only stopped paying child support for six months (and that DOES make him a deadbeat), and his CS was $658.00 per month as you state, the arrearage would be just under $4000, not $10,000 as you infer.

Your math is totally whacked or you are withholding information.

Either way, you'll get no help if you aren't honest about the ENTIRE situation.

And just for the record calling to see if he needs anything is ridiculous. Your husband was ordered to pay support and he hasn't. You know what the kid needs? I'll tell you and I don't even know the kid - food, clothing, a home, an education, and social activities. Now...I've saved you the trouble of a phone call to granny. That's what the kid needs - have your husband pay for it like he's supposed to.

 

[stealth2]

Yeah, the math is way off - not even interest would bring it up over 10k.

So. How about the rest of the story?

 

[rapunzel30]

Too all men and women out there who are planning on marrying someone with cs. It can not and will not be stopped (in most cases) until the child is of age (depending on your state). It is most difficult to lower and even harder to eliminate (the cs). Yes, I am a women, but I just saw a Lawyer regarding my cs case, and he stated that laws are made to protect a child and courts only see that. The noncustodial parent will always need to pay.

 

[VeronicaGia]

My question is why in the hell he allowed someone else to get custody of this child? Do the grandparents actually have court ordered custody? If so, why did he allow this?

 

[wife w/question]

I appriciate ya'll bringing the numbers to my attention, I never thought about it. I looked at all his paycheck stubs where they took CS out. And ya'll are right, the numbers are wrong. He definatetly has paid up untill the last six months. How in the hell they came up with 10 K is beyond me. I guess that gives me something else to try and figure out.

No one said anything about having the child support stopped, I just feel like they shoud modify it to his current pay rate. CS is 22% to 50% correct? Well thats what it is in Texas, anyway, $800.00 is well over half of his pay.

As for the grandparents stealing custody, We were served with papers on a Friday night, and court was scheduled for Monday morning. How many lawyers do you know that will be in the office on a weekend? Or How many lawyers do you know that will take a child custody case on 3 days notice??? or even take a child custody case for less than 10 grand up front?? I don't know any, if you do, would you pleeeeese give me their number, because I have not been able to find one.
The ex wife took him over there and left him, we had no clue, if we had've known he was there, I assure you we could have gone over there and got him, before it got this far. All you people want to pass judgement, none of you really understand the whole thing, it would take me hours upon hours to explain it all to you. I thought this site would help, not make it worse. LOL
by the way if any of you are real lawyers, please give me your number, I will call and explain everything in full detail. Thanks ( Preferrably a Texan)

 

[Smarty Panties]

You go in, ask the judge for a continuance so you can find legal counsel. Did he even attend the hearing?

 

[wife w/question]

Yeah, He Went To The Hearing, They Didn't Even Give Him A Chance To Speak. They Were Attacking Him Like 10 Pittbulls On A T-bone Steak. At That Time He Was Not Behind On Anything. He Has Been To Court Many Times And Everytime It's The Same Thing, No Time To Find A Lawyer And No Chance To Speak.

 

[Phnx02]

Too all men and women out there who are planning on marrying someone with cs. It can not and will not be stopped (in most cases) until the child is of age (depending on your state). It is most difficult to lower and even harder to eliminate (the cs). Yes, I am a women, but I just saw a Lawyer regarding my cs case, and he stated that laws are made to protect a child and courts only see that. The noncustodial parent will always need to pay.

Gee, I didn't realize that children don't need to eat until they turn 18!

 

[Gracie3787]

What is the name of your state? Texas
My husband's ex wife is a drug addict. She pretty much gave their son to my father-in-law and his wife (who hates my husband with a passion). My husband had a really good job at the time and they set the child support at his current pay rate, which that was fine. About 6 months ago my husband quit his job due to safety reasons (please keep in mind that he did NOT quit that job because of child support. he paid his child support like clock work for 2 1/2 years)
Anyway, we have tried and tried over and over agin to get the attorney General to lower the child support and they refuse. We are now $10,000 behind. I know that is an awful lot but remember his child support was set at $658.00 a month. It don't take long to build up. He went to court the other day and his step mom was pushing for him to go to jail, thank God, he didn't put not only did they raise his child support another hundred dollars, but he is now on probation. My husband is not a deadbeat dad. What can we do to convince the court? We have no money to pay an attorney, what can we do to get the payments lowered. I know that child is not hurting for anything. His grandparents are rich, I mean come on, give me a break all they are doing is spoiling that child. My husband has no problem paying child support but we cannot afford $800.00 a month. Who can?? What can we do to get it lowered? We can't afford a lawyer.

You stated that your husband was placed on "probation".
Was he charged with CIVIL contempt?
Or was he charged with CRIMINAL contempt?

It may be very important because an attorney here in Fl. told me that when a NCP is charged with CRIMINAL contempt an attorney (public defender) has to be provided because it falls under criminal law, not civil law. (I am aware that it may be different in your state, but if I'm wrong, I'm sure that another poster will correct me.)

 

[Gracie3787]

Yeah, He Went To The Hearing, They Didn't Even Give Him A Chance To Speak. They Were Attacking Him Like 10 Pittbulls On A T-bone Steak. At That Time He Was Not Behind On Anything. He Has Been To Court Many Times And Everytime It's The Same Thing, No Time To Find A Lawyer And No Chance To Speak.

Wow, Judges in Florida do the same thing to unrepresented NCP's, even tho there has been 4 "hearings" my husband has never been allowed to speak or present evidence in court either. (thank God, our situation is coming to a close soon, unfortunately without him ever having a legal fair hearing.).

The two things that we have learned about going into court without an attorney are:

1. DOCUMENTATION- take any and every document that even remotely might be relevent with yiou to court.

2. Hire a court reporting service, if he isn't allowed to speak or present evidence in court, there will be a legal record of it.

If he wasn't charged with criminal contempt and cannot afford an attorney, he needs to find out how to do everything himself. He needs to file In Court a modification petition for both CS and custody.

He also needs to take a copy of the Consumer Credit Protection Act to his employer and remind them that they cannot withold more than 55% of his net income for CS, even if it is less than the court ordered amount. I know that money is tight, but he needs to pay at least some support, and it will help him look better in court.
Good luck.
Gracie