Help -- This doesn't seem right

[cdkbp12]

What is the name of your state? OK
I was ordered to pay about $6,000 in unpaid child support for years my child did not live with me.

WHen asked, my ex failed to mention to the agency that I deposit $200 almost every two or three weeks into my ex's bank account for my child. Whenever my child calls me on the phone for money, I always send it. There has never been a time I"ve rejected money to them. I even sent copies via post mail to that state agency with bank receipts showing my recorded deposits; however, they told me they were too difficult to read. I even tried faxing them... the same outcome!

I also pay my child's out-of-state health insurance. I have been paying an income assignment of about $300 a month for quite some time and I still give more when my child calls me for money.

Recently, the state agency has been sending letters that I owe all this $$. Now I have to fly to OK (I live out of state) to speak to a judge about this amount. WIll the judge even let me speak?

I do not know much in legal terms, please help. I cannot afford to pay $6000 at once. Who can? I am very willing to pay it, IF that is what I owe. What you suggest? Thank you kindly.What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?

 

[MrsK]

What is the name of your state? OK
I was ordered to pay about $6,000 in unpaid child support for years my child did not live with me.

WHen asked, my ex failed to mention to the agency that I deposit $200 almost every two or three weeks into my ex's bank account for my child. Whenever my child calls me on the phone for money, I always send it. There has never been a time I"ve rejected money to them. I even sent copies via post mail to that state agency with bank receipts showing my recorded deposits; however, they told me they were too difficult to read. I even tried faxing them... the same outcome!

I also pay my child's out-of-state health insurance. I have been paying an income assignment of about $300 a month for quite some time and I still give more when my child calls me for money.

Recently, the state agency has been sending letters that I owe all this $$. Now I have to fly to OK (I live out of state) to speak to a judge about this amount. WIll the judge even let me speak?

I do not know much in legal terms, please help. I cannot afford to pay $6000 at once. Who can? I am very willing to pay it, IF that is what I owe. What you suggest? Thank you kindly.What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?

If there is no court order, the court sees it as a gift. Unfortunate, but true.

Is the $6k supposed to go to the MOM or the state??? Because if its supposed to go to mom (in other words, if she wasnt on state aide, b/c then it would go to the state) you should ask mom to do the right thing and forgive the arrears.

If you go to court, bring the bank statements...they may not matter but if the judge looks at them he MAY reduce the arrears...they COULD matter so I'd still bring them.

 

[cdkbp12]

Reply to MrsK

The order was from the court to pay my ex (the defendant) the $6k.
She only filed for the child support after she learned that I was going to be married to my fiance of 3 years. We are now married and we are very fortunate with our jobs and extermely happy, whereas my ex is miserable at this point in her life. So it seems she wants to try to make me miserable as well. My wife and I are Christians, so our mentality is different than hers. We hope the best for her and her life but we feel she's being very vindictive. Now we don't want anything to do with her. HELP!

 

[Michiganian]

If there is no court order, the court sees it as a gift. Unfortunate, but true.

Is the $6k supposed to go to the MOM or the state??? Because if its supposed to go to mom (in other words, if she wasnt on state aide, b/c then it would go to the state) you should ask mom to do the right thing and forgive the arrears.

If you go to court, bring the bank statements...they may not matter but if the judge looks at them he MAY reduce the arrears...they COULD matter so I'd still bring them.

If there is no court order and the court sees it as a gift then how would the ex collect if in fact there was no court order stating he had to pay support? In Michigan, support starts the day they receive modification/request for a support order and not before that date. I'm not sure if it the same in all states.

 

[mrkndee]

I know nothing of OK law, however after dealing with child support issues for 8 years in California I can tell you that court order or not, parents are expected to support their children from day 1. That means if you and the CP divorce, separate, whatever, you are still required to pay child support even without a court order. If you have cancelled checks, take them with you to show that you did help support your child. If you have medical insurance that has been used for the child, take the EOB with you as well. Hopefully, the courts will take everything into consideration and be "fair" (I use that term very loosely!! )
Be prepared for the court to calculate what would have been the order from day one and then if you weren't paying that much, to tell you that you owe arrears PLUS interest.
GOOD LUCK!!!!