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cippolina

Junior Member
Good afternoon! My husband pays support to his daughter from the first marriage. According to the divorce paper he has to pay for her college also 50%. His daughter now in junior high school. Her mother, my husbands ex-wife wants to send her to private tutor for preparation for SAT test. My question is, is a private tutor a part of college expenses or does his ex-wife want to abuse my husband? Thank you for you help.
 


Banned_Princess

Senior Member
Good afternoon! My husband pays support to his daughter from the first marriage. According to the divorce paper he has to pay for her college also 50%. His daughter now in junior high school. Her mother, my husbands ex-wife wants to send her to private tutor for preparation for SAT test. My question is, is a private tutor a part of college expenses or does his ex-wife want to abuse my husband? Thank you for you help.
If it is afternoon to you, you are on pacific time.

not good enough WHAT STATE ARE YOU IN?

Does his ex wife want to "abuse" him? give me a break. :rolleyes: Maybe shes thinking of their daughters future! he should help pay it.

If he wants to know, then direct him to ask. he was her husband first, and their issues are none of your business. and don't give me that "but it is my business, hes my husband, and we have our own kids to worry about" BS, because we don't take that garbage here.
 

cippolina

Junior Member
I hear what you are saying. I do understand everything about personal relations. I did not say anything incorrect and did not make nobody suffer. I have asked only a question and I assume it is supposed to have an answer but not personal opinion. And if you are lawyer you are not allowed to express you personal thought about a case, I guess we do not know each other to talk to me in such a way.
 

Banned_Princess

Senior Member
I hear what you are saying. I do understand everything about personal relations. I did not say anything incorrect and did not make nobody suffer. I have asked only a question and I assume it is supposed to have an answer but not personal opinion. And if you are lawyer you are not allowed to express you personal thought about a case, I guess we do not know each other to talk to me in such a way.
Why have you ignored our question several times.


WHAT STATE ARE YOU IN??????? (US LAW ONLY)
 

Isis1

Senior Member
I hear what you are saying. I do understand everything about personal relations. I did not say anything incorrect and did not make nobody suffer. I have asked only a question and I assume it is supposed to have an answer but not personal opinion. And if you are lawyer you are not allowed to express you personal thought about a case, I guess we do not know each other to talk to me in such a way.
Please read the TOS. You are not a client. There is no attorney prophets requirement.

Dad is not required to pay anything not required in the court order. So it depends on the exact wording of the court order. Pay half of theses expenses is not abuse. Demanding to pay for ALL of the tutoring would be unreasonable. There is no abuse anywhere in this situation.
 

cippolina

Junior Member
We live in New York. She moved in New Jersey. I am sorry because I am a little bit nervous because she sent this letter today. I appreciate you help very much. I just mad with this woman. I do understand he is a father. He left everything to them after divorce. The problem is that he has not see his daughter already 3 years. She never calls him. They moved and did not give any adress, phone number. You know, she just sent him letters to pay for this, and this and this. But he does not even know what he is paying for because he cannot even talk to daughter. I do not think it is right. That it. He suffers, and you know it is a little hard to give almost the half of his salary to somebody who does not even care about you.
Thank you for understanding.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
We live in New York. She moved in New Jersey. I am sorry because I am a little bit nervous because she sent this letter today. I appreciate you help very much. I just mad with this woman. I do understand he is a father. He left everything to them after divorce. The problem is that he has not see his daughter already 3 years. She never calls him. They moved and did not give any adress, phone number. You know, she just sent him letters to pay for this, and this and this. But he does not even know what he is paying for because he cannot even talk to daughter. I do not think it is right. That it. He suffers, and you know it is a little hard to give almost the half of his salary to somebody who does not even care about you.
Thank you for understanding.


What has your husband done to pursue visitation with his child?

He suffers because he's choosing to do so.

(The Dalai Lama would back me up there)
 

cippolina

Junior Member
He has. She said she did not want to see him anymore and he is not her father anymore. When he wanted to see her, her mother did not allowed saying it was bad for her health and sent the bill from psychiatrist. And made order protection with the help of wonderful court system.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
He has. She said she did not want to see him anymore and he is not her father anymore. When he wanted to see her, her mother did not allowed saying it was bad for her health and sent the bill from psychiatrist. And made order protection with the help of wonderful court system.


Ah, no.

You see, the court system is not going to restrain a parent from the seeing the child unless there is actually evidence that doing so would damage the child.

They're not going to go on Mom's word.

So, what do you think you haven't been told?

Did Dad go to court to enforce visitation? Did he ask that a GAL be appointed to represent the child's best interests?
 

OHRoadwarrior

Senior Member
Going to an SAT prep, is premature until she has taken the SAT at least once. Based on her results, they can determine the areas she needs to focus on. It certainly is not a necessity. If your daughter has average scores and is planning on an average school, she is fine without it. If she has high aspirations, she should have the test scores to qualify already. I did not pay for my stepdaughter too, because she is going to a college her score should be fine to gain admittance too.
 

cippolina

Junior Member
Hon, if he really gave a crap about his child, he'd move heaven and earth to find her and try to have a relationship with her.
I know this. I told him. But he is stubborn and think if he did not do anything wrong why he should do the steps. Its all about mother. Unfortunately these 2 grown up people, fighting and arguing with each other, do not understand that they make suffer their kids.
 

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