Modification

[cstoohigh]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

I live in California. My kids live with their mother in North Carolina. We got divorced in Tennessee. I got out of the army in 2012. Since then I have not been able to find a job here. I am behind on my support because I don't have the money to pay it. Right now I am not sure how much I owe exactly but I know it is more than 20,000. I am supposed to pay $903 per month. I got unemployment for part of 2012 and they garnished it so some payment was made then, until February of 2013. That was the last payment. I tried to get it modified but it went to court in North Carolina and I couldn't go. The judge there denied the modification. I am scheduled for court for contempt in August. Will I be able to get my support modified at that court date? Right now I cannot pay anything because I don't work. I would like to have it set to 0 until I find a job, and have the back support wiped out if possible. The mother works, and her new husband works, and they don't need this money from me, I feel like she is taking me to court just to be spiteful. Also, will I be able to get a free lawyer for this hearing to help get it modified? Thanks.

 

[Silverplum]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

I live in California. My kids live with their mother in North Carolina. We got divorced in Tennessee. I got out of the army in 2012. Since then I have not been able to find a job here. I am behind on my support because I don't have the money to pay it. Right now I am not sure how much I owe exactly but I know it is more than 20,000. I am supposed to pay $903 per month. I got unemployment for part of 2012 and they garnished it so some payment was made then, until February of 2013. That was the last payment. I tried to get it modified but it went to court in North Carolina and I couldn't go. The judge there denied the modification. I am scheduled for court for contempt in August. Will I be able to get my support modified at that court date? Right now I cannot pay anything because I don't work. I would like to have it set to 0 until I find a job, and have the back support wiped out if possible. The mother works, and her new husband works, and they don't need this money from me, I feel like she is taking me to court just to be spiteful. Also, will I be able to get a free lawyer for this hearing to help get it modified? Thanks.

A contempt hearing is not a modification hearing. So no, you won't be able to modify CS then.

The answer to the rest of your questions is simply no. No, no, no. No.

 

[Ladyback1]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? The mother works, and her new husband works, and they don't need this money from me, I feel like she is taking me to court just to be spiteful.

While Mom and Stepdad may not NEED this money, YOUR KIDS DO! Hello??

Gawd at the audacity and stupidity!

 

[single317dad]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

I live in California. My kids live with their mother in North Carolina. We got divorced in Tennessee. I got out of the army in 2012. Since then I have not been able to find a job here. I am behind on my support because I don't have the money to pay it. Right now I am not sure how much I owe exactly but I know it is more than 20,000. I am supposed to pay $903 per month. I got unemployment for part of 2012 and they garnished it so some payment was made then, until February of 2013. That was the last payment. I tried to get it modified but it went to court in North Carolina and I couldn't go. The judge there denied the modification. I am scheduled for court for contempt in August. Will I be able to get my support modified at that court date? Right now I cannot pay anything because I don't work. I would like to have it set to 0 until I find a job, and have the back support wiped out if possible. The mother works, and her new husband works, and they don't need this money from me, I feel like she is taking me to court just to be spiteful. Also, will I be able to get a free lawyer for this hearing to help get it modified? Thanks.

If you want your support amount modified, either you or your appointed representative (read:attorney) need to show up to court. There's not much you can do until you can accomplish that much.

At court (for a CS mod), you'll be asked to explain why you're unable to find work and support your children. Short of an excellent excuse, you'll not get a modification of support.

At court (for contempt), you'll be asked why you've failed to comply with the court's order that you support your children. Short of an excellent excuse, the court will use remedies at its disposal to encourage you to pay up. Those remedies may include a stern talking-to, extra amounts weekly for arrears, interest, loss of licenses (driving and professional), revocation of passport, seizure of assets like bank account and tax refund, or jail with a purge (an amount that must be paid to gain your release).

Good luck.

 

[cstoohigh]

My kids don't need it either. They seem to go on vacation several times a year and they have expensive clothes and more than they need. Their mother stayed home while we were married and I paid for everything so how is this any different now? I guess only men are supposed to work and pay all the bills? Can I file for a modification in California then because I can't afford to go to North Carolina for court. I need to get the amount lowered.

 

[Ladyback1]

My kids don't need it either. They seem to go on vacation several times a year and they have expensive clothes and more than they need. Their mother stayed home while we were married and I paid for everything so how is this any different now? I guess only men are supposed to work and pay all the bills? Can I file for a modification in California then because I can't afford to go to North Carolina for court. I need to get the amount lowered.

Noooooo....adults who have responsibilities (like children) should work and pay bills regardless of gender.

I guess it's ok that some other man is paying for and raising your kids....I guess that you should have no responsibility for the lives you helped create? All because Mom and Stepdad bust their asses at a job every stinkin' day?

 

[CSO286]

Are you sure it's mom who's taking you to court? If the state is enforcing the court order, they could be filing contempt without mom even asking them to.

Next, it doesn't matter whether or not you think mom or the kids need the money. It's quite simply about your duty to continue providing support for the children you've helped create.

Next, since it appears that NC has jurisdiction over the matter, you file for modification there, and request to appear at the hearing by phone.

As far as the contempt matter, depending on what stage contempt you are at, you *might* be eligible for a court appointed attorney.

Now, some general child support comments/questions:
Have you been actively job seeking? Can you prove it? Job applications, interviews, etc?
Have you been in touch with your child support caseworker to keep him/her appraised of your situation?
Have you accepted or applied for any/all jobs you could be able to do, and not just those you are "willing to accept"? For example, have you looked into basic labor jobs, convenience stores, fast food or other min wage jobs and not just what you might like to do or have been trained to do?

Child support is menat ot reimburse the custodial parent for money he or she has already spent providing for the children. to reiterate a previous posters point: Why should you not be required to provide for your children?

 

[CSO286]

My kids don't need it either. They seem to go on vacation several times a year and they have expensive clothes and more than they need.

You have a legal duty to provide for your children. Regardless of whether or no you feel they need it.
And who ar you to say they do or do no need the support?

Their mother stayed home while we were married and I paid for everything so how is this any different now? I guess only men are supposed to work and pay all the bills?

The state doesn't care whether or not the CP is working, they simply care that the kids are being provided for not at the expense of the state. And once an order for support is issued that they need to enforce, they will do so by all legal means necessary to ensure that the children do not require the financial support of the state's taxpayers.
Do not go into court with that attitude unless you want your backside handed to you by the judge/magistrate.

Can I file for a modification in California then because I can't afford to go to North Carolina for court.

No, you need to file in NC. If need be, request a fee waiver and you can also request to appear in court by phone. However, this will not help you in your contempt hearing.

I need to get the amount lowered.

And see my previous post for add'l info/questions.

 

[cstoohigh]

I just think it is very unfair that she got to sit home and not work through most of the marriage, and be lazy. I went to school after I got out, in a program for diesel mechanics, but there aren't any jobs I can find here. I need to make at least $15 an hour at this point to even make it worth it to have a job. If I make minimum wage and the state takes half, that would leave me with something like $600 a month. Hardly worth going to work all month for. I have been applying for some jobs. I have had a few interviews. I went to a truck driving school at one point, but did not pass the driving test.

So they will take my drivers lisene. That will definitely help me get a job! I don't have a bank account, so they can't garnish that. I haven't filed any taxes. If they tell me I have to pay more, I still won't be able to pay. I guess if they put me in jail, then I will just have to be in jail, better jail I guess then working 40 hours a week to bring home $150.

It just figures, my lazy ex-wife sat around our whole marriage and got to benefit from my hard work. Then she went to school after we got divorced on the governments dime, and makes good money, more then 70,000 a year, and her husband makes over 100,000 a year, and she still wants to sit around and profit from me. Oh, and she does have some part in this because her signature was on some of the papers that I got.

I did get to call in for the modification hearing, but the judge denied it because he thought my unemployment was voluntary, which it was not. I was not allowed to reenlist.

 

[single317dad]

If I make minimum wage and the state takes half, that would leave me with something like $600 a month. Hardly worth going to work all month for.

What if you also got to stay out of jail? Would that change your opinion of working for minimum wage?

I did get to call in for the modification hearing, but the judge denied it because he thought my unemployment was voluntary, which it was not.

It is voluntary. Just because you can't find a job that isn't beneath you doesn't mean you can't find a job.

 

[cstoohigh]

I have applied for some minimum wage jobs too, but the economy is bad. In case you didn't know, California has one of the highest unemployment rates in the country.

How likely is it that they will put me in jail if this is my first time of contempt? And there is no chance at all that the judge will just dismiss this? I am a veteran, and a lot of veterans have had a hard time finding work.

 

[cstoohigh]

In the paper it says That by reason of the facts stated and provisions of code of civil procedures section 1209.5 it is alleged that cite had the ability to make all of the payments required by said order when they became due. But this is untrue, because I didn't have a job. Isn't that a defense?

 

[Eekamouse]

Your ex was lazy and didn't work while married to you? Didn't she stay at home taking care of your children?

 

[cstoohigh]

Your ex was lazy and didn't work while married to you? Didn't she stay at home taking care of your children?

She stayed home. She worked some short term jobs in the evenings, when I was home. I would have preffered she worked, we fought about that a lot. Usually she would quit when I got deployed, she didn't like having the kids go to a daycare.

If it was fair for her to stay home, and me to support her and the kids, then why can't the kids come live with me now, so I can be a stay at home parent and she can pay the bills here? But she would never let that happen because she would rather punish me by making me broke. I can't even have a car in my name because of her.

 

[Indiana Filer]

Why don't you ask her if her husband wants to adopt the children and then you can cut off all ties to them, except for the back support you owe, since it appears you don't give a darn about the kids at all. They would no longer be your children and you wouldn't have to support them from the adoption forward.

SPIT


Worthless POS