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hurtingmother

Junior Member
What is the name of your state?Texas


Hello, I am needing some advice on what to do. I have 2 sons with my x-husband. He has not been in there lives in the past 8 years. He was court ordered to pay child support and has only made one payment in the past 8 years. He called the police this past weekend and said he wanted his kids and showed them the divorce papers. I was told by the police i would be arrested if i did not give them to him even though he had not made any child support payments that i would be arrested for a felony for violation of court decree. Is this right???? My X-husband told me that he will not pay child support and theres nothing i can do. He said he knows his rights. I don't know what i can do. I called the attorney generals office but they said i need to pay 75.00 and hire an attorney and i will have to pay court costs to go after him for non payment. I don't have the extra money for an attorney they want 2,500. Is the laws really this bad? That after 8 years he can take my kids away at christmas and the police will do nothing to help the mother? What can i do? Does he still have rights after 8 years of no visits and no payments? Need advice please
 


stealth2

Under the Radar Member
He sure does. Until that order is modified, it is in full effect and he can pop in like this and you have to follow what it says. I'm sorry, but you have little choice until and unless you get a modification - which isn't going to happen in the next week.
 

ejmmolina

Member
If you read the state laws after 6 months to a year of no contact you can TPR in Texas. Child support is considered contact, but since he is not paying you dont have to worry about this. He does still have rights to the kids until you get your court order changed. I say if you want to chance it wait 6 months then go for TPR. If my husband had know about this trust me we would not be where we are today fighting with a mother who says she wants her kids but never calls or come to see them except on holidays. Or you can have your court ordered changed to allow for a getting to know you again phase and hope he steps up to be a dad.
 

nextwife

Senior Member
Child support and visitation are seperate legal matters. One has nothing to do with the other.

The ONLY thing that changes you visitation order is a NEW visitation order by a judge.
 
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Merry Christmas in Jail 2005

HM:

Top Secret Question: What would happen if X shows up to pick-up the kids and nobody's home? Call the police and ask them.

I know if my X hadn't had ANY contact (and additionally not supported the children) for eight years and then tried that kind of BS, I'd be in Mexico for a very festive Christmas weekend. And since nobody home = no confrontation, I bet the police would tell your X that HE would have to seek JUSTICE through the courts. Ha, ha...see you in court, jerk.

Stealth is correct, as far as the courts are concerned, nothing is going to happen as quickly as this weekend. Especially if you can't afford an atty. If you're not afraid that he'll harm your children, your best bet would be to let him visit according to the terms of the order.

Now, let's talk about next Christmas. The TX AG's office is charged with helping in the collection of support. They WILL help you make X's life miserable. It will cost you next to nothing. But the process is s l o w. It will take some time but, in the end, if your X fails to pay he will be staring at a warrant. Get started. When he shows up for X-mas next year, Santa's helpers in blue will have his name on the "NAUGHTY" list.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Is anybody paying attention to the fact that its been 8 years? He is a complete stranger to the kids at this point. What is this dad thinking? He ignores his kids for 8 years and then goes to the POLICE to drag drama into their lives? What a jerk!

There is little to no chance that a judge would hold her in contempt for not allowing him to just up and take the kids after 8 years. Judge's don't send kids off with complete strangers even if that stranger is their parent.

That business about the police and it being a felony is a bit of BS as well.

If I were her I would offer to let the dad see the kids under her supervision (with another adult present) until she can get to court and get a reunification plan ordered....AND file contempt for non-payment of child support. Otherwise I would plan to spend Christmas elsewhere if possible. These children's feelings are more important than anything else at this point.

Guys, I know that its important to tell people that court orders have to be obeyed, because there are consequences if they are not. However we all know here that mom is NOT going to get in trouble for not obeying this particular court order. We all know how a judge is going to react if he files for contempt (if he even DOES it). As soon as the judge finds out that he abandoned his kids for 8 years, and didn't pay child support either and then went to the POLICE to try to enforce 8 year old orders the judge is going to have his tush for breakfast!
 
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Tinaa

Member
It does not cost anything for the Texas OAG to go after the guy for non-payment of child support of which I am aware. They work very slowly , but you get what you pay for. Police very rarely get involved in cases like this. Did you talk to the police or are you listening to your ex? Contempt hasn't even be filed at the time you refuse the visitation attempt. Are you collecting some kind of assistance like food stamps, medicare or tanf?
 
"Don't Mess With TX"

Been to TX, lately? It's a different world from the one we live in. When I travel down there, I mind my P's & Q's. How many people were executed in your state last year? Don't get me wrong...I love TX...it's a great place to visit.

Standard language in EVERY TX decree has an accompanying "Notice To Peace Officers" which is two paragraphs and is in BOLD, ALL CAPS which gives them "immunity against any claim, civil or otherwise" resulting from their use of reasonable efforts to enforce the terms of the child custody order. Trust me, they WILL enforce. There are an additional TWO PAGES of all caps warnings of jail/monitary fines that may accompany violation of the order.

Do not try and have a show-down at the O.K. Corral (meaning your front door.) If you do, the police will enforce the order. I'm a NCP with kids in TX -- they don't like me, but they do enforce. However, if your not at home, they're not going to have a stakeout, etc. They'll tell dad to go to court. Take care.
 
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Tinaa

Member
I live smack dab in the middle of Texas. My divorce papers have no such clause (I got it out to make sure), my husband's papers have nothing of the sort written in his either. Maybe this is something new?
 
Tinaa:
This is the most current TX Family Statute which relates to mandatory contents of final order...Good bedtime reading...nite-nite. Chapters 161/162 are specific to TPR and Adoption respectively.

§ 105.006. CONTENTS OF FINAL ORDER. (a) A final order,
other than in a proceeding under Chapter 161 or 162, must contain:
(1) the social security number and driver's license
number of each party to the suit, including the child, except that
the child's social security number or driver's license number is not
required if the child has not been assigned a social security number
or driver's license number; and
(2) each party's current residence address, mailing
address, home telephone number, name of employer, address of
employment, and work telephone number, except as provided by
Subsection (c).
(b) Except as provided by Subsection (c), the court shall
order each party to inform each other party, the court that rendered
the order, and the state case registry under Chapter 234 of an
intended change in any of the information required by this section
as long as any person, as a result of the order, is under an
obligation to pay child support or is entitled to possession of or
access to a child. The court shall order that notice of the
intended change be given at the earlier of:
(1) the 60th day before the date the party intends to
make the change; or
(2) the fifth day after the date that the party knew of
the change, if the party did not know or could not have known of the
change in sufficient time to comply with Subdivision (1).
(c) If a court finds after notice and hearing that requiring
a party to provide the information required by this section to
another party is likely to cause the child or a conservator
harassment, abuse, serious harm, or injury, the court may:
(1) order the information not to be disclosed to
another party; or
(2) render any other order the court considers
necessary.
(d) An order in a suit that orders child support or
possession of or access to a child must contain the following
prominently displayed statement in boldfaced type, capital
letters, or underlined:
"FAILURE TO OBEY A COURT ORDER FOR CHILD SUPPORT OR FOR
POSSESSION OF OR ACCESS TO A CHILD MAY RESULT IN FURTHER LITIGATION
TO ENFORCE THE ORDER, INCLUDING CONTEMPT OF COURT. A FINDING OF
CONTEMPT MAY BE PUNISHED BY CONFINEMENT IN JAIL FOR UP TO SIX
MONTHS, A FINE OF UP TO $500 FOR EACH VIOLATION, AND A MONEY
JUDGMENT FOR PAYMENT OF ATTORNEY'S FEES AND COURT COSTS."
"FAILURE OF A PARTY TO MAKE A CHILD SUPPORT PAYMENT TO THE
PLACE AND IN THE MANNER REQUIRED BY A COURT ORDER MAY RESULT IN THE
PARTY NOT RECEIVING CREDIT FOR MAKING THE PAYMENT."
"FAILURE OF A PARTY TO PAY CHILD SUPPORT DOES NOT JUSTIFY
DENYING THAT PARTY COURT-ORDERED POSSESSION OF OR ACCESS TO A
CHILD. REFUSAL BY A PARTY TO ALLOW POSSESSION OF OR ACCESS TO A
CHILD DOES NOT JUSTIFY FAILURE TO PAY COURT-ORDERED CHILD SUPPORT
TO THAT PARTY."
(e) Except as provided by Subsection (c), an order in a suit
that orders child support or possession of or access to a child must
also contain the following prominently displayed statement in
boldfaced type, capital letters, or underlined:
"EACH PERSON WHO IS A PARTY TO THIS ORDER IS ORDERED TO NOTIFY
EACH OTHER PARTY, THE COURT, AND THE STATE CASE REGISTRY OF ANY
CHANGE IN THE PARTY'S CURRENT RESIDENCE ADDRESS, MAILING ADDRESS,
HOME TELEPHONE NUMBER, NAME OF EMPLOYER, ADDRESS OF EMPLOYMENT,
DRIVER'S LICENSE NUMBER, AND WORK TELEPHONE NUMBER. THE PARTY IS
ORDERED TO GIVE NOTICE OF AN INTENDED CHANGE IN ANY OF THE REQUIRED
INFORMATION TO EACH OTHER PARTY, THE COURT, AND THE STATE CASE
REGISTRY ON OR BEFORE THE 60TH DAY BEFORE THE INTENDED CHANGE. IF
THE PARTY DOES NOT KNOW OR COULD NOT HAVE KNOWN OF THE CHANGE IN
SUFFICIENT TIME TO PROVIDE 60-DAY NOTICE, THE PARTY IS ORDERED TO
GIVE NOTICE OF THE CHANGE ON OR BEFORE THE FIFTH DAY AFTER THE DATE
THAT THE PARTY KNOWS OF THE CHANGE."
"THE DUTY TO FURNISH THIS INFORMATION TO EACH OTHER PARTY,
THE COURT, AND THE STATE CASE REGISTRY CONTINUES AS LONG AS ANY
PERSON, BY VIRTUE OF THIS ORDER, IS UNDER AN OBLIGATION TO PAY CHILD
SUPPORT OR ENTITLED TO POSSESSION OF OR ACCESS TO A CHILD."
"FAILURE BY A PARTY TO OBEY THE ORDER OF THIS COURT TO PROVIDE
EACH OTHER PARTY, THE COURT, AND THE STATE CASE REGISTRY WITH THE
CHANGE IN THE REQUIRED INFORMATION MAY RESULT IN FURTHER LITIGATION
TO ENFORCE THE ORDER, INCLUDING CONTEMPT OF COURT. A FINDING OF
CONTEMPT MAY BE PUNISHED BY CONFINEMENT IN JAIL FOR UP TO SIX
MONTHS, A FINE OF UP TO $500 FOR EACH VIOLATION, AND A MONEY
JUDGMENT FOR PAYMENT OF ATTORNEY'S FEES AND COURT COSTS."
(e-1) An order in a suit that provides for the possession of
or access to a child must contain the following prominently
displayed statement in boldfaced type, in capital letters, or
underlined:
"NOTICE TO ANY PEACE OFFICER OF THE STATE OF TEXAS: YOU MAY
USE REASONABLE EFFORTS TO ENFORCE THE TERMS OF CHILD CUSTODY
SPECIFIED IN THIS ORDER. A PEACE OFFICER WHO RELIES ON THE TERMS OF
A COURT ORDER AND THE OFFICER'S AGENCY ARE ENTITLED TO THE
APPLICABLE IMMUNITY AGAINST ANY CLAIM, CIVIL OR OTHERWISE,
REGARDING THE OFFICER'S GOOD FAITH ACTS PERFORMED IN THE SCOPE OF
THE OFFICER'S DUTIES IN ENFORCING THE TERMS OF THE ORDER THAT RELATE
TO CHILD CUSTODY. ANY PERSON WHO KNOWINGLY PRESENTS FOR ENFORCEMENT
AN ORDER THAT IS INVALID OR NO LONGER IN EFFECT COMMITS AN OFFENSE
THAT MAY BE PUNISHABLE BY CONFINEMENT IN JAIL FOR AS LONG AS TWO
YEARS AND A FINE OF AS MUCH AS $10,000."
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Since her orders were written a minimum of 8 years ago, they probably don't contain any of the language that has been mentioned.

Mom simply needs to not be home. The kids don't need this. It would be great for them to be reintroduced to their dad, if he truly is prepared to be a dad, but not this way.

We also know now that the police lied about the "felony" bit. It says that they may use "reasonable efforts" to enforce the order. Clearly they cannot "arrest" mom.
 
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