+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 22
  1. #1
    Emstrak is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13

    Proper court documents to stop child support payments??

    What is the name of your state? Virginia (active-duty Military family)

    My husband recently agreed to terminate parental rights and allow his ex-wife's current husband to adopt his daughter. I know that sounds crazy for a father to do that, but please be open minded to this situation. His ex-wife would constantly change her email/phone number and never allow my husband to have any contact with his daughter. He wanted to take her to court but we had no money to retain an attorney, but made to much money for any kind of legal aid...go figure. After three years of having little to no contact with his duaghter, he was petitioned to terminate rights and release for adoption. He felt it would be in the best interest of his daughter to not fight the petition.

    The order to terminate parental rights and for adoption was finalized April 7th in court. My question is...since the Military automaticly deducts the support from his check, what appropriate paperwork will be needed to terminate child support. The signed court order for adoption was faxed to DFAS and we have yet to hear that the payments have been stopped. The court order clearly states that my husband's rights as a father have been terminated, and that the child's surname be changed to the adoptive father's...and so on. It doesn't specificly state that child support from the biological father is to stop but I am assuming that it is implied since the child has been legally adopted.

    Thanks for taking the time to read this...and if anyone has any suggestions/comments to simplify this proccess I would greatly appreciate this.
  2. #2
    justalayman is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    in the ether
    Posts
    34,726
    he needs to file for a modification, or actually a termination of the court order that ordered the child support inititally.

    One court order does not automatically alter another order. Each needs to be treated independantly of the other. If it was not included in the order to remove his parental rights, he needs to file for the modification of the CS order to have it stopped.
  3. #3
    Emstrak is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13
    I'm confused? The order that was filed, and signed by the judge states:

    a. The parental rights of the biological father, *******, are hereby terminated as to the minor child, now and hereinafter.

    b. The petition fo Adoption for ******** by ******, joinedby her husband ****, is found welltaken, and the minor child is hereby adjudicated to be finally adopted by ****, joined by his wife and the minor child's natural mother, **** .

    It talkes about inheritance (she is to inherit from her new father, as she would if she would have been born to them out of natural wedlock. It talkes about that in quite a few paraghras so I won't write them ver batum...but you get the idea.

    Then it states...

    that the natural parent whose rights are hereby terminated and natural kindred of the child through that parent, shall not inherit by or through the child.

    The appropriate State Agency should correct the birth certificate of the respective child to reflect the names of the adopting parents; that the subject minor child's surname is change to ****

    The appropriate State Agency should change the name of the minor child ***** to ***** (new father's last name)

    It clearly states that his rights are terminated, the Attorney retained by his ex-wife seemed to think that was all that was needed, but I'm not sure he has dealt with the Military. Things need to black and white...there is no room for grey area. So a modification filed by us is what we need? Normally, does that have to be filied in the state the original order for child support (in this case Mississippi) Is that something you can normally do yourself, or is it best to retain an Attorney? Sorry I am asking a lot of questions. I tend to be a skeptic and my husband seems to "roll with the punches" I had a feeling this process would not go as easy as we were told. He works hard for his money and has never been late/missed a previous child support payment. He has tried for the last two years to have contact w/ his duaghter, but her mother made it very difficult. (Since we live in VA and they live in MS) Now that he is no longer her father, I don't think it's fair that she get a penny more than what she in intitled to. The adoption was finalized on 4/7/08. She will get May's child support b/c we could not stop the automatic deduction in time. Her Attorney is advising her to return the money, but I don't think she will. I just don't want the same thing to happen for June....

    OK, I'm rambling...sorry.
    Last edited by Emstrak; 04-26-2008 at 01:53 PM.
  4. #4
    hearts41 is offline Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    south
    Posts
    227
    Quote Originally Posted by Emstrak View Post
    I'm confused? The order that was filed, and signed by the judge states:

    a. The parental rights of the biological father, Mark James Strak Junior, are hereby terminated as to the minor child, now and hereinafter.

    b. The petition fo Adoption for ******** by ******, joinedby her husband ****, is found welltaken, and the minor child is hereby adjudicated to be finally adopted by ****, joined by his wife and the minor child's natural mother, **** .

    It talkes about inheritance (she is to inherit from her new father, as she would if she would have been born to them out of natural wedlock. It talkes about that in quite a few paraghras so I won't write them ver batum...but you get the idea.

    Then it states...

    that the natural parent whose rights are hereby terminated and natural kindred of the child through that parent, shall not inherit by or through the child.

    The appropriate State Agency should correct the birth certificate of the respective child to reflect the names of the adopting parents; that the subject minor child's surname is change to ****

    The appropriate State Agency should change the name of the minor child ***** to ***** (new father's last name)

    It clearly states that his rights are terminated, the Attorney retained by his ex-wife seemed to think that was all that was needed, but I'm not sure he has dealt with the Military. Things need to black and white...there is no room for grey area. So a modification filed by us is what we need? Normally, does that have to be filied in the state the original order for child support (in this case Mississippi) Is that something you can normally do yourself, or is it best to retain an Attorney? Sorry I am asking a lot of questions. I tend to be a skeptic and my husband seems to "roll with the punches" I had a feeling this process would not go as easy as we were told. He works hard for his money and has never been late/missed a previous child support payment. He has tried for the last two years to have contact w/ his duaghter, but her mother made it very difficult. (Since we live in VA and they live in MS) Now that he is no longer her father, I don't think it's fair that she get a penny more than what she in intitled to. The adoption was finalized on 4/7/08. She will get May's child support b/c we could not stop the automatic deduction in time. Her Attorney is advising her to return the money, but I don't think she will. I just don't want the same thing to happen for June....

    OK, I'm rambling...sorry.


    How sad, IMO, that a father would give up his rights. Just because a mother might have made visitation difficult there are remedies for that, and it isn't that expensive! Visitation is a right of the child.
    Since you are so worried about June's child support I suggest your husband talk with someone regarding his obligations or lack thereof.
  5. #5
    Emstrak is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13
    Please, I could go into extreme detail of the things his ex-wife have done but honestly I don't have the time. Making visitation difficult was not even scraping the surface of what she has done. Every package he had sent her, Christmas, summer/winter clothes, school supplies was returned to him. When he did go to Mississippi for the SOLE purpose of seeing his daughter, she would not allow it. She would leave town and take his daughter to stay w/ her. We had spoken to a lawyer and although you may be right with the actual cost of retaining an attorney may not be too exspensive, the cost of round trips from Mississippi and Virginia would add up very quick. We both work full time (he is in the Navy) and we have a two year old as well. Money is tight for us and we just could not afford it and our credit is already stretched thin...a loan to cover these costs would have been out of the question. It has been three years since he has seen his daughter. Her mother has re-married and there is a stable "father" in her life. It would only confuse his daughter more to have him come in and out of her life when her mother "feels like letting him see her". I'm not asking you to judge the situation, I was only asking, on behalf of my husband, (I was bored last night and couldn't sleep...and happened upon this website) any suggestions that may make this process easier. Obviously I know very little on Family Law which is why I was asking a simple question. What you may think about this is your own opinion and you are entitled to that. However, until you have walked a mile in our shoes, and seen the stress and discontent our family has been through regarding this situation, please try to refrain (or keep it to yourself) from assuming that he is a dead-beat dad. He is far from that.
  6. #6
    justalayman is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    in the ether
    Posts
    34,726
    I didn't bother to read the entire novel but from what I did read, bio-dads rights have been terminated. That does not automatically terminate the standing child support order. They are seperate issues and need to be addressed as such.

    either file for the modification or be faced with paying CS as long as the original CS court order requires.

    is the order still controlled by Mississippi? if so, then you file there. If not, you file in the state that controls the order.

    It should be an easy fix considering the adoption. An attorney never hurts but an intelligent and determined person should be able to do this with minimal assistance, if any.
  7. #7
    hearts41 is offline Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    south
    Posts
    227

    Cool

    Quote Originally Posted by Emstrak View Post
    Please, I could go into extreme detail of the things his ex-wife have done but honestly I don't have the time. Making visitation difficult was not even scraping the surface of what she has done. Every package he had sent her, Christmas, summer/winter clothes, school supplies was returned to him. When he did go to Mississippi for the SOLE purpose of seeing his daughter, she would not allow it. She would leave town and take his daughter to stay w/ her. We had spoken to a lawyer and although you may be right with the actual cost of retaining an attorney may not be too exspensive, the cost of round trips from Mississippi and Virginia would add up very quick. We both work full time (he is in the Navy) and we have a two year old as well. Money is tight for us and we just could not afford it and our credit is already stretched thin...a loan to cover these costs would have been out of the question. It has been three years since he has seen his daughter. Her mother has re-married and there is a stable "father" in her life. It would only confuse his daughter more to have him come in and out of her life when her mother "feels like letting him see her". I'm not asking you to judge the situation, I was only asking, on behalf of my husband, (I was bored last night and couldn't sleep...and happened upon this website) any suggestions that may make this process easier. Obviously I know very little on Family Law which is why I was asking a simple question. What you may think about this is your own opinion and you are entitled to that. However, until you have walked a mile in our shoes, and seen the stress and discontent our family has been through regarding this situation, please try to refrain (or keep it to yourself) from assuming that he is a dead-beat dad. He is far from that.

    I stated it as such, "IMO".
    By the way, you say you have a two year old child, how about giving up that one, how would you feel if he just walked away from that child?
    It really doesn't matter if the mother felt like letting him see the child, if she made things difficult or not. Having a visitation Order that spells out everything is a place to start, and then when a custodial parent pulls tricks with visitation file contempt charges everytime. But if life is too hectic, too expensive, and your credit stretched too thin then I guess terminating parental rights is always an option! Good grief
  8. #8
    Emstrak is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13
    Thank you, Justalayman, but one more question for you if you don't mind...

    The standing court order for child supoprt is in Mississippi. Would we have to physically GO to Mississippi to file this modification, or is this something that can be done via online/fax correspondence? If I am not mistaken, the Attorney that did the adoption, did mail a copy of the adoption papers to the original court where the initial child support order was drafted and signed. So I guess it could be a possibility that perhaps this process is already happening???

    As for hearts41, you know my situation from the three posts I have made...that's it. Thank you for your opinion. Like I said before, I'm not here to find out whether or not you approve of the situation, I just simply asked what specific documents we needed to stop support. If you are looking for a "rise" out of me, I am sorry to inform you that you have the wrong girl.
  9. #9
    justalayman is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    in the ether
    Posts
    34,726
    You are right, it may be in process but it may have simply beena notification by the attorney so you would not try or be able to do anything in those courts.

    I do not know if you could do this via phone/fax. I have my doubts but you may be able to hire a local attorney (local to the Mississippi courts) to act on your behalf. You might get away without actually ever having to go to Miss.
  10. #10
    Emstrak is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13
    Thanks again! We will start working on it first thing Monday morning, but hopefully I am right and the process may have already begun. I wonder how long the process may take and what happens to the money that she will still receive until it is resolved. As of April 7th he is no longer the father but she did receive the full payment for April and she will receive a direct deposit payment for May's as well. Are we legally entitled to the money back?
  11. #11
    Silverplum is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Golden, CO
    Posts
    26,009
    Be quiet, hearts.

    This poster is not your child, so quit acting like you have some sort of moral high ground here from whence to pontificate.

    The legal question/s are answered: and not by you, I see. No one is remotely interested in your opinion about how things shoulda/coulda/woulda been handled.

    Quote Originally Posted by hearts41 View Post
    I stated it as such, "IMO".
    By the way, you say you have a two year old child, how about giving up that one, how would you feel if he just walked away from that child?
    It really doesn't matter if the mother felt like letting him see the child, if she made things difficult or not. Having a visitation Order that spells out everything is a place to start, and then when a custodial parent pulls tricks with visitation file contempt charges everytime. But if life is too hectic, too expensive, and your credit stretched too thin then I guess terminating parental rights is always an option! Good grief
  12. #12
    Emstrak is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13
    Thank you!!! This was not something that we decided to do overnight, or just because she had made visitation difficult...there was a large series of events leading up to this point. Her and her new husband petitioned him, it's not like he asked to give up his rights and allow another man to adopt his child. It's unfortunate that this was the way it had to be, but in the interest of both family involved, it is the best thing for everybody.
  13. #13
    2Mistakes is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    1,610
    What county in MS is the case in? If it is Harrison, is it 1st JD or 2nd JD?

    If it is Harrison County, feel free to PM me and I'll provide you with some contact info. for some very helpful clerks at the Chancery Court Clerk's office.

    You won't do much via online with any of the Chancery Clerks in MS, as they don't have that capability, but you may be able to handle most of it via fax/snail mail.
  14. #14
    Emstrak is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13
    The adoption was in Rankin County, but the original Child Support order was done in Jackson County. We did our research today and the Attorney who handled the adoption is going to draft up the termination papers and overnight it to Jackson County Courts. It seems like an easy process, although I can't help but admit that it irks me that she will get May's payment and more than likely June's sent straight into her checking acct from DFAS. Now we have to hope that when her attorney advises her to return the money to us, she will actually do it. Looking at her previous track record...that will be highly unlikely.
  15. #15
    hearts41 is offline Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    south
    Posts
    227
    Quote Originally Posted by Silverplum View Post
    Be quiet, hearts.

    This poster is not your child, so quit acting like you have some sort of moral high ground here from whence to pontificate.

    The legal question/s are answered: and not by you, I see. No one is remotely interested in your opinion about how things shoulda/coulda/woulda been handled.
    Plum: I have every right to voice an opinion, never stopped anyone on this board before to say what they feel/think. Because you don't like me doesn't mean I can't or should not comment, your opinions you can keep to yourself or post em, who cares....

    p.s. don't ya think its rather redundant to tell someone to "be quiet" on a public forum" Eye roll right back at ya....

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 2
    Last Post: 02-26-2011, 11:52 AM
  2. Steps to stop child support payments
    By luckymorgan in forum Child Support
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 06-27-2008, 03:48 PM
  3. Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-26-2005, 05:15 PM
  4. stop child support payments
    By dirtyratjim in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 09-16-2002, 03:38 PM
  5. when do child support payments stop?
    By sissis in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 07-29-2002, 07:03 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

© 1995-2012 Advice Company, All Rights Reserved

FreeAdvice® has been providing millions of consumers with outstanding advice, free, since 1995. While not a substitute for personal advice from a licensed professional, it is available AS IS, subject to our Disclaimer and Terms & Conditions Of Use.