She wants child support but...

[HisDad0810]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Maryland

ok so we do have joint custody. she has not let me see my son in 8 months since the order was put in place. we were never married. we go to court for custody soon. she is asking for child support. the thing is when she left I knew where she went and I tried sending her diapers wipes toys etc and she would never answer the door for the ups man so a lot of things got left at the door or sent back so I stopped sending them because I felt like she was throwing the stuff away. I do have receipts for all. my question is....even though they base this stuff on your income...will the judge lower the child support due to the fact that I tried sending things and she just denies them all the time? or they do not care?

 

[Zigner]

Short answer: No.

Longer answer: Those items were "gifts" that you gave in support of your child. Even if there was a current order (which it doesn't seem there is) those gifts wouldn't "count" towards child support.

 

[HisDad0810]

wow

Lol, its sad the type of bs that males have to go through when these females are playing the game. You try to be a father and you still end up being jerked.

 

[Silverplum]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Maryland

ok so we do have joint custody. she has not let me see my son in 8 months since the order was put in place. we were never married. we go to court for custody soon. she is asking for child support. the thing is when she left I knew where she went and I tried sending her diapers wipes toys etc and she would never answer the door for the ups man so a lot of things got left at the door or sent back so I stopped sending them because I felt like she was throwing the stuff away. I do have receipts for all. my question is....even though they base this stuff on your income...will the judge lower the child support due to the fact that I tried sending things and she just denies them all the time? or they do not care?

Nope. CS is set by formula. Gifts before the court order are gifts. Wait till you are court-ordered, and pay that.

 

[Silverplum]

Lol, its sad the type of bs that males have to go through when these females are playing the game. You try to be a father and you still end up being jerked.

Okey-dokey.

 

[Zigner]

Lol, its sad the type of bs that males have to go through when these females are playing the game. You try to be a father and you still end up being jerked.

Yeah - I mean, why should both parents have to support their child, right?

(I was a single father with sole custody of my 3 children and received no help from the mother...)

 

[ecmst12]

If you want to see your child, you need to go to court and get an enforceable visitation schedule ordered. Child support has nothing to do with gender, it is payable to the custodial parent whomever that may be (there are plenty of single dads with custody getting child support, or ordered to be getting child support). And support is a completely separate issue from visitation and custody.

 

[Just Blue]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Maryland

ok so we do have joint custody. she has not let me see my son in 8 months since the order was put in place. we were never married. we go to court for custody soon. she is asking for child support. the thing is when she left I knew where she went and I tried sending her diapers wipes toys etc and she would never answer the door for the ups man so a lot of things got left at the door or sent back so I stopped sending them because I felt like she was throwing the stuff away. I do have receipts for all. my question is....even though they base this stuff on your income...will the judge lower the child support due to the fact that I tried sending things and she just denies them all the time? or they do not care?

Px Hx....

 

[single317dad]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Maryland

ok so we do have joint custody. she has not let me see my son in 8 months since the order was put in place. we were never married. we go to court for custody soon. she is asking for child support. the thing is when she left I knew where she went and I tried sending her diapers wipes toys etc and she would never answer the door for the ups man so a lot of things got left at the door or sent back so I stopped sending them because I felt like she was throwing the stuff away. I do have receipts for all. my question is....even though they base this stuff on your income...will the judge lower the child support due to the fact that I tried sending things and she just denies them all the time? or they do not care?

Why have you not taken Mom back to court for contempt of the custody order? I guarantee she will do the same to you when you fail to pay your support.

 

[Ohiogal]

Why have you not taken Mom back to court for contempt of the custody order? I guarantee she will do the same to you when you fail to pay your support.

I don't think there is an order as he says they are going to court for custody soon.

 

[single317dad]

I don't think there is an order as he says they are going to court for custody soon.

I was basing the question on this:

ok so we do have joint custody. she has not let me see my son in 8 months since the order was put in place.

And yes, directly after that, he states they're "going to court for custody soon". So, which is it, OP? Do you have a court order, and if so, what does it say?

 

[BL]

If you want to see your child, you need to go to court and get an enforceable visitation schedule ordered. Child support has nothing to do with gender, it is payable to the custodial parent whomever that may be (there are plenty of single dads with custody getting child support, or ordered to be getting child support). And support is a completely separate issue from visitation and custody.

I don't know about that State ,but underlined is generally true , not in all cases .

My State is one , BTDT.

Again ,is there a valid current Custody/Visitation order?

 

[HisDad0810]

I have a protective order on her where we have joint custody, but we are going to the big courts soon for the real custody matter. I tried to take her 2 court a millllion times for contempt and they kept denying me. also I have sent her numerous emails asking can I help and if I send money will she accept it because she has not before. once again ignored. I was being ignored when trying to support my son for over 8 months. I have every one of the 400+ emails I sent her. also please stop with the smart remarks im not saying that only one parent should support the child what I am saying is that I am trying to support him and she wont let me instead she wants MONEY instead of just letting me give him the stuff he really needs but wont let me be in his life. also she has a warrant out finally that I saw today for her arrest for detaining him out of state when we have joint custody through the protective order and now she is trying to make an agreement which is me seeing him 2 weeks a year. I don't agree to that. I cant establish a relationship with him for 14 days a year. once again im asking how does this work? if she has a warrant are my chances greater of getting him? the cops said they are going to arrest her on that day. thanks again for the advice in advance guys. and now she suddenly put him in daycare and got him private health insurance a month before the court date and he is going to a private daycare which is 7500 a year. isn't it obvious she is just trying to take me to the bank. I mean I want to support my child but I also need to support myself not get robbed

 

[Proserpina]

I have a protective order on her where we have joint custody, but we are going to the big courts soon for the real custody matter. I tried to take her 2 court a millllion times for contempt and they kept denying me. also I have sent her numerous emails asking can I help and if I send money will she accept it because she has not before. once again ignored. I was being ignored when trying to support my son for over 8 months. I have every one of the 400+ emails I sent her. also please stop with the smart remarks im not saying that only one parent should support the child what I am saying is that I am trying to support him and she wont let me instead she wants MONEY instead of just letting me give him the stuff he really needs but wont let me be in his life. also she has a warrant out finally that I saw today for her arrest for detaining him out of state when we have joint custody through the protective order and now she is trying to make an agreement which is me seeing him 2 weeks a year. I don't agree to that. I cant establish a relationship with him for 14 days a year. once again im asking how does this work? if she has a warrant are my chances greater of getting him? the cops said they are going to arrest her on that day. thanks again for the advice in advance guys. and now she suddenly put him in daycare and got him private health insurance a month before the court date and he is going to a private daycare which is 7500 a year. isn't it obvious she is just trying to take me to the bank. I mean I want to support my child but I also need to support myself not get robbed

Do you actually understand the concept of child support?

 

[HisDad0810]

lol no how bout u help me understand? its like you guys are ignoring everything else I am saying and just trying to dwell on the fact that im asking about the child support matter n its making me a little angry. not every guy is a dead beat dad but I also don't want to have to live my life like a bum because my sons mother decided to leave. don't bash me just help me. if you feel I don't understand then help me understand but please also answer my other questions. thank you