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Stolen child support

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Cleanover11

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Louisiana

My ex husband pays child support, and owed back support. The support he wss ordered to pay began when we separated (my son was 10months old). It ended when my son was 6 and a half. He did not begin paying until my son was 5. Therefore, he owed me quite a bit.

During this period, my parents were awarded custody. They began taking the support he was paying , stating they deserved it.

My child support case was recently closed due to the completion of my ex paying the back support I was owed.

My parents have now filed for support from him, and he is ordered to pay back support from the date they were awarded custody.

I had been telling them that they were taking my back support, but they would always respond the same way... that what I was saying was ridiculous because the state would not order him to pay me support when they had custody.

Long story short, they received and spent 27 months of support that I was supposed to be receiving. Around $11,000 worth.

This money was for me because of me raisin my son while receiving no sipport.I feeel as though they stole it from me.

What are my rights in this situation?
Can they be ordered to repay me since they were taking the money that was supposed to be given to me?
I dont want to take money away from my son...but their argument is always "wr deserve it because wr are raisimg (my son) and (my ex) should help out financially since he does nothing else." Well...shouldn't this also apply to when I had custody and was raising my son?



I don't know if this matters, but I have always been a very active and involved part of my child's life even though I don't have custody. Even during the times i technically don't live here, with them, I am literally always here....like i am.not even seen at my place for weeks except when I show up to get a new bag of clothes , do laundry, etc. I care for my son over 50% of the time - bathing, feeding, doimg.homework with, studying with, playing, etc...

I just find it unfair that they are basically collecting double child support.. they took the support meant for me AND will now be receiving back support for that exact same time frame.
 


Cleanover11

Junior Member
I cannot figure out how to edit....sorry for typos . Let me know if you are confused or need clarification on anything.
 

eerelations

Senior Member
Whoever has custody of the child is supposed to get the child support owed for that child. If your parents had custody of your child during a certain period of time, then your parents are the ones who are supposed to get child support for that child during that timeframe.

Are you saying that you think you should have been receiving child support during a time your parents had custody of the child? Or are you sayinh that your parents are accepting child support for a period of time when they did not have custody of the child?
 

Cleanover11

Junior Member
Well that is not necessarily true ....that the support goes to whomever has custody. Letters from DCFS verify that during the period I did NOT have custody, the payments he was making were mine. They were being paid to me, in my name, because he was still catching up on back support.

DCFS said the child support was back support owed from when I had custody and was not receiving it (the back support was still being paid on even the though custody arrangements changed). Just like in the event that any back support owed still needs to be paid off after a child turns 18 and is not in anyone's custody.

DCFS told me that payments are first applied to back support owed, and when that is paid up to date, the payments go toward current support owed.

Now that my back support has been paid off, payments are going to be applied toward back support owed to my parents until that is paid up to date.

So,yes, I am saying the payments received during the time I did not have custody were mine.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Well that is not necessarily true ....that the support goes to whomever has custody. Letters from DCFS verify that during the period I did NOT have custody, the payments he was making were mine. They were being paid to me, in my name, because he was still catching up on back support.

DCFS said the child support was back support owed from when I had custody and was not receiving it (the back support was still being paid on even the though custody arrangements changed). Just like in the event that any back support owed still needs to be paid off after a child turns 18 and is not in anyone's custody.

DCFS told me that payments are first applied to back support owed, and when that is paid up to date, the payments go toward current support owed.

Now that my back support has been paid off, payments are going to be applied toward back support owed to my parents until that is paid up to date.

So,yes, I am saying the payments received during the time I did not have custody were mine.
Then how did your parents get the money that was due to you?
 

Cleanover11

Junior Member
In my OP I mentioned they said it should be their money and took the card the money was loaded onto. I'm not petty enough to let my child go without. None of us knew they were going to receive support for this time frame down the road.
 

Cleanover11

Junior Member
. If your parents had custody of your child during a certain period of time, then your parents are the ones who are supposed to get child support for that child during that timeframe.
They are only now, two years later, getting the support for that timeframe even though my ex has been paying for about 4yrs now. They will get their own debit card.
 

Cleanover11

Junior Member
eerelations;3439414 Or are you sayinh that your parents are accepting child support for a period of time when they did not have custody of the child?[/QUOTE said:
Re-read and answer to that is Yes.

I am new to this forum and am trying to figure out a way to edit posts so i can quit posting consecutively.
 

Cleanover11

Junior Member
Is that a joke?
You don't have a real answer to my question nor have you been helpful. Your contribution to this thread has been to get confused. I suppose I'll wait to get a competent answer on Monday.

What would your answer be from the other perspective: "I was just awarded custody of my grandson. His father is paying child support but it is the back pay that my daughter is owed from the 7yrs she raised her son. Should I be allowed to use it for my bills and online shopping and the like?"
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Is that a joke?
You don't have a real answer to my question nor have you been helpful. Your contribution to this thread has been to get confused. I suppose I'll wait to get a competent answer on Monday.
Hon, your posts have been very unclear, which is why you have not received good answers. All we are trying to do is pull relevant information out of you so that its clear what is actually going on.

What would your answer be from the other perspective: "I was just awarded custody of my grandson. His father is paying child support but it is the back pay that my daughter is owed from the 7yrs she raised her son. Should I be allowed to use it for my bills and online shopping and the like?"
Except that isn't what happened. What happened is that she took your back pay long before.

Do you see the "reply with quote" button? If you could use that it would be very helpful. Then we would know who you are replying to.

We are trying to understand what is going on here. Either your parents stole the debit card from you or you caved and gave it to them because they demanded that you do so.

If its the first explanation then your only solution is to try to have them arrested for stealing the debit card. If its the second explanation then there is nothing you can do at all. Personally, I would have reported the card lost when they took it and would have gotten a replacement card. I do agree that your parents are being paid twice for the same period of time, but unless you get the law involved or they have a "come to Jesus" revelation that they are being horribly unfair, there is little you can do.

We really don't like giving "if this happened then this is the answer but if that happened the answer is different" responses to posters. So we ask questions if the person posting is unclear or vague about what is going on.
 

not2cleverRed

Obvious Observer
In my OP I mentioned they said it should be their money and took the card the money was loaded onto. I'm not petty enough to let my child go without. None of us knew they were going to receive support for this time frame down the road.
Really?

All you all thought that child support would completely end at age 6?

Yes, the money was for arrears owed you, but it sounds like you GAVE them your card. They didn't steal the card from you - they guilted you into handing it over. You have no proof that they took the card without your knowledge and/or consent. You have to legal grounds for suing them.

Are you now paying child support?
 

Cleanover11

Junior Member
Hon, your posts have been very unclear, which is why you have not received good answers. All we are trying to do is pull relevant information out of you so that its clear what is actually going on.



Except that isn't what happened. What happened is that she took your back pay long before.

Do you see the "reply with quote" button? If you could use that it would be very helpful. Then we would know who you are replying to.

We are trying to understand what is going on here. Either your parents stole the debit card from you or you caved and gave it to them because they demanded that you do so.

If its the first explanation then your only solution is to try to have them arrested for stealing the debit card. If its the second explanation then there is nothing you can do at all. Personally, I would have reported the card lost when they took it and would have gotten a replacement card. I do agree that your parents are being paid twice for the same period of time, but unless you get the law involved or they have a "come to Jesus" revelation that they are being horribly unfair, there is little you can do.

We really don't like giving "if this happened then this is the answer but if that happened the answer is different" responses to posters. So we ask questions if the person posting is unclear or vague about what is going on.
Thank you for the reply.
 

Cleanover11

Junior Member
Really?

All you all thought that child support would completely end at age 6?

Yes, the money was for arrears owed you, but it sounds like you GAVE them your card. They didn't steal the card from you - they guilted you into handing it over. You have no proof that they took the card without your knowledge and/or consent. You have to legal grounds for suing them.

Are you now paying child support?
Wow. People here are a little judgy, but to answer that, they assumed the money was theirs. He was paying $50 more than he owed each month.... so they said maybe the 50 was my back support.

And when I called the child support office at one point, they said his payments were current payments (which I later found out to be incorrect). My parents told me that they were not changing the support to their name because it would be too difficult so I should give them my card. I now suspect they knew better ...and just didn't tell me.

I could not get a clear answer as to whether his payments were being applied to their case or mine.In fact, i didn't even know at the time that there would be another case opened for them.

In my ignorance, i assumed all the information regarding custody and child support was all linked. And that the child support office had it all figured out. UAntil I got the letter which stated my case was closed...that is when I realized he had been paying arrears the whole time. And that they would get their own "case" for support owed to them.

And yes, really. To assume that we all thought child support ended before age 18 is not the only explantion. I was just unaware at the time that payments were first applied to the arrears.
 

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