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Tanf issue

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workingvadad

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia


Ok here is the deal i have going on. The mother of my daughter orginal had custody of my daughter and i just had visitation. Then she got in trouble for drugs and other things and my daughter was placed in emergency custody with my daughters great grandmother. I found out that during that time i should not have been paying Tanf(is there a way for me to get that money back) i got it stopped in November. The great grand mother had custody from about May until December. At the support hearing for my arrears in December the State was made aware of the custody situation as it had been stopped by the CS office and i was almost all the way caught up on my support and the state said just pay the remaining amount you owe the case was closed that day. The judge was happy and removed it from the docket. Also in December i finaly gained 50/50 physical custody. There is also a order of joint legal custody between myself, the mother and the great grand mother. Shortly after the custody hearing the mother went back to dss and reapplied for TANF. The thing is my daughter is not with the mother a full 26 weeks of her half of the year due to the fact she must be supervised while around my daughter. When my daughters mother goes back to work during amusment park season on those days my daughter stays with the great grand mother. So due to those factors my daughter is with me all of my 26 weeks out of the year. The mother does not work she collects a check for disability for mental problems. Is there any thing i can do about this with these factors it makes me 100% financially liable for my daughter.



Any help would be appreciated. Hope i have enough info for help with this issue.
 


mistoffolees

Senior Member
1. Even with 50:50 physical custody, one party often pays child support if the incomes are different.

2. I doubt very much that "There is also a order of joint legal custody between myself, the mother and the great grand mother". Grandma is almost certainly not on the custody order (although it's possible that she has visitation). Get out the court order and tell us exactly what it says about custody.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
1. Even with 50:50 physical custody, one party often pays child support if the incomes are different.

2. I doubt very much that "There is also a order of joint legal custody between myself, the mother and the great grand mother". Grandma is almost certainly not on the custody order (although it's possible that she has visitation). Get out the court order and tell us exactly what it says about custody.


Misto..in this OP's case, GMA may actually have some form of custody.

Post hx suggests that's the case - Dad may have agreed to it, given the circumstances.
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
Misto..in this OP's case, GMA may actually have some form of custody.

Post hx suggests that's the case - Dad may have agreed to it, given the circumstances.
That may be the case, but I still think it's unlikely that the court granted 3 way custody to Dad AND Mom AND Grandma.

But OP can clarify the issue by posting the exact wording of the custody part of the decree (without names, of course).
 

BL

Senior Member
Post is a bit confusing , but here's your defense to any petition for CS from the mother.

The thing is my daughter is not with the mother a full 26 weeks of her half of the year due to the fact she must be supervised while around my daughter.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Post is a bit confusing , but here's your defense to any petition for CS from the mother.
Why is that a defense? Are you assuming that the child needs no support during mom's time because mom has a supervisor?
 

BL

Senior Member
Why is that a defense? Are you assuming that the child needs no support during mom's time because mom has a supervisor?
As I said , the post is confusing .

Most supervisions are that of visitations .

The court terminated CS for Dad.

If Mom lives with granny who supervises ( ? ) , who knows .

It would not appear that Mom would have standing as she is supervised .

The question was about Mom and the Petition.
 

workingvadad

Junior Member
ok sorry about the confusion of my post been a bit busy but here is what the court order says.


Father,mother and great grand mother shall have have joint legal custody of the child. father and mother shall have 50/50 shared physical custody. they shall have week to week sharing with exchanges to be at 4pm on sundays with the delivering parent providing transportation. how ever the mothers custodial time with the child shall be supervised at all times by her mother or grandmother. father shhall as his schedule allows complete an anger managment class. father and mother shall update oen another at least every other day via email of the the childs status. visitation exchanges may be altered due to truly incliment weather though the winter.



hope this helps out more
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
ok sorry about the confusion of my post been a bit busy but here is what the court order says.


Father,mother and great grand mother shall have have joint legal custody of the child. father and mother shall have 50/50 shared physical custody. they shall have week to week sharing with exchanges to be at 4pm on sundays with the delivering parent providing transportation. how ever the mothers custodial time with the child shall be supervised at all times by her mother or grandmother. father shhall as his schedule allows complete an anger managment class. father and mother shall update oen another at least every other day via email of the the childs status. visitation exchanges may be altered due to truly incliment weather though the winter.



hope this helps out more
That's such a bizarre order, I don't know what to say. Frankly, if the order really says all of that, it's anyone's guess how a judge would rule on anything. If they issued such an order, their response is completely unpredictable.
 

workingvadad

Junior Member
yes it is very bizzare to me.....i was just informed yesterday that the mother wants to enroll my daughter in pre school now and she is not even 2 years old yet**************i see this has her trying to gain control over my daughter and me and keep her away from me and use the pre school as some sort of day care for her......if i could afford a lawyer i would go that route but i have no options of assistance on that matter so fighting all on my own and think i am fighting a loosing battle being in VA and the way that things are done in this common wealth
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
yes it is very bizzare to me.....i was just informed yesterday that the mother wants to enroll my daughter in pre school now and she is not even 2 years old yet**************i see this has her trying to gain control over my daughter and me and keep her away from me and use the pre school as some sort of day care for her......if i could afford a lawyer i would go that route but i have no options of assistance on that matter so fighting all on my own and think i am fighting a loosing battle being in VA and the way that things are done in this common wealth
I would definitely see an attorney to see what can be done.

However, wanting to enroll the child in pre-school at age 2 is not something that should be a concern. Lots of kids are in pre-school at that age and do very well.
 

workingvadad

Junior Member
yeah i know its a good thing.....i am just mad that she is doing it without my consent and using it to keep my time with my daughter limited
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
yeah i know its a good thing.....i am just mad that she is doing it without my consent and using it to keep my time with my daughter limited
You really need to stick to facts and not let your emotions carry you away.

You don't know that she's doing it just to hurt you. She might well be doing it because it's best for the child (a view that you are agreeing with).

Do NOT try to ascribe motives to peoples' actions. It will come back to bite you.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
So, the child goes to 2 year old preschool when she's with mom and you do your thing on your 50%. She can't "ding" you cuz preschool is NOT mandatory for 1 and secondly, she didn't consult you.
 

workingvadad

Junior Member
doing my best to stick to the facts**************my case us very complicated and communication with the mother is almost impossible. any court date we have its me fighting for myself. while its her,her mother and grand mother on the other side fighting me but they always say they are not trying to keep me from my daughter but they never wanted me to get the 50% i finally did get......the judge had to force them to give me a copy of the SS card and i still cant get the BC cause she says she will never sign papers to let me get the BC and she will not let me know the docs name so i can get my own hard copy of the SS card......just hope that i find a way to get a lawyer by december
 

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