Unreimbursed Medical Expenses

[kat308]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New York

Recently my husband's ex stopped accepting any emails from him because she thought it I was sending them. That wasn't true. I don't get involed since this is not my battle. So he started to communicate with her via mail. She is extremely vile and nasty so he won't speak with her by phone on the advice of his attorney. In his last letter to her, he suggested she speak with their son because he was making claims to his grandmother about seeing naked pictures of her and sex acts he claimed he saw her doing and that he seemed upset. My husband did not say these things or that he believed them. He just felt she should speak to her son.

Anyway, she left six horrible messages today cursing and screaming and in the last one she said she was going to withhold all medical and daycare expenses for a year so she could tell the court to take his entire salary because he wouldn't pay. Can she legally do this? Their support order states she is to send them to him in a timely manner. I told him to keep the message and all copies of his letters asking that the bills be mailed since she didn't want to communicate via email. He has always paid on time.

He has a call into his attorney but hasn't heard back yet.

[Humusluvr]

Originally Posted by kat308

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New York

Recently my husband's ex stopped accepting any emails from him because she thought it I was sending them. That wasn't true. I don't get involed since this is not my battle. So he started to communicate with her via mail. She is extremely vile and nasty so he won't speak with her by phone on the advice of his attorney. In his last letter to her, he suggested she speak with their son because he was making claims to his grandmother about seeing naked pictures of her and sex acts he claimed he saw her doing and that he seemed upset. My husband did not say these things or that he believed them. He just felt she should speak to her son.

Anyway, she left six horrible messages today cursing and screaming and in the last one she said she was going to withhold all medical and daycare expenses for a year so she could tell the court to take his entire salary because he wouldn't pay. Can she legally do this? Their support order states she is to send them to him in a timely manner. I told him to keep the message and all copies of his letters asking that the bills be mailed since she didn't want to communicate via email. He has always paid on time.

He has a call into his attorney but hasn't heard back yet.

That is absolutely what he should do.

Is there anything in the order that says how long she has to submit the expenses? 30 days?

How is she going to have the court "take his whole salary?" Ranting, IMHO.

[kat308]

I read his order once again and believe it or not, it does not give a time frame.

Could the court really allow her to hold these exepneses for that long and expect him to pay up within 5 days of receipt?

He does make alot and his child support payments which include daycare are 40% approximately of his take home. He can just scrape by.

[Zephyr]

definitely keep the message, if the court knows that is the game she is playing they may very well allow dad to pay it off over a much longer period of time....dad also has the option of contacting the doctors himself for the bills....or he may want to insure the child and make her doctors aware of the second (I assume) insurance and then there should be no out of pocket

[kat308]

He tapes all his messages from her. She has already one had a Restraining order on her. In fact my husband is looking at this once again since she is leaving the most horrible messages.

Zephyr, that's a great idea. Maybe he could check with the doctors monthly. But there is another problem. His son takes alot of meds for ADHD and behavior issues. Hopefully the pharmacy will release his info. Although, he could show them the court order that allows him access to all medical record. The one problem that we will run into is that recently, they were in court about daycare expenses and the support magistrate is now allowing her to pay her mother for daycare and we wouldn't know when or how much.

[Zephyr]

Originally Posted by kat308

He tapes all his messages from her. She has already one had a Restraining order on her. In fact my husband is looking at this once again since she is leaving the most horrible messages.

Zephyr, that's a great idea. Maybe he could check with the doctors monthly. But there is another problem. His son takes alot of meds for ADHD and behavior issues. Hopefully the pharmacy will release his info. Although, he could show them the court order that allows him access to all medical record. The one problem that we will run into is that recently, they were in court about daycare expenses and the support magistrate is now allowing her to pay her mother for daycare and we wouldn't know when or how much.

daycare providers must also share requested information with the parents....but what did mom tell the court she was paying for daycare to her mom? take that amount, divide it in have (or whatever dad's percentage is) and send that amount in check form with daycare in the memo section to the grandma each week

[MrsK]

Your husband should ignore her, but keep the message & any others she leaves.

Does he carry the insurance (sorry, I may have missed where you said this). If he carries the insurance, then he should get the EOB's which will tell him when & where & how much is owed, etc. Otherwise, he should try & check with the Dr's.

But, if there are any he misses, when she takes him to court, he should ask to play the tape so the judge can see what mom was up to. The judge may tell mom she is SOL for doing that out of spite.