Waiving Back Child Support Help

[Bethosu7]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[Bethosu7]

I think I messed it up- original post

Hello,

I have been divorced since March 2013. I made the papers on a computer program and he signed everything away to me. He didn't even show up to court because he already moved states. He also still has yet to take his parenting classes. Over the past years he has struggled to keep a job and has never actually paid child support timely. Some times he skips months and sometimes it's only half a months worth. Child support is set to the minimum of $321.50 for us right now. He has lived in 5 different states since December 2012. He sees his kids once a year at Christmas. Twice if they're lucky. And talks to them on the phone every few months. Just recently he moved to Nevada. In Nevada you have to have a license to work. He can't get one because of back child support. He originally wanted me to waive the back child support of $3,100 so he could be able to get a job and start paying again. Now he is willing to pay $1,300 towards it and is wanting me to waive the rest. I am worried that this could effect things in the future with my kids. I was told if I waive it, they could get kicked of Soonercare. He was told the amount was below the threshold, and it would be fine. I am also worried that if he threatens me, yet again, to take full custody of my children, waiving it would look bad on my part. And lastly, I am afraid that waiving it could negatively effect the outcome of any future chance of increasing child support.

Is this something that wont affect anything? Or should I just steer clear of it, because there is the possibility, down the road, it would look bad on me. I want to help him, I don't want him to suffer. And him getting a job is in the best interest of the kids. But, I need to make sure my children wont suffer as a result. His mom is swearing that if he doesn't pay back the rest like he promises, she will. If he really can't get a job like he says, it would be better to waive it so he can start working and I can get child support again. I'm just so scared that I'm going to screw myself down the line if I do.

Thank you so much for your time.

 

[LdiJ]

Hello,

I have been divorced since March 2013. I made the papers on a computer program and he signed everything away to me. He didn't even show up to court because he already moved states. He also still has yet to take his parenting classes. Over the past years he has struggled to keep a job and has never actually paid child support timely. Some times he skips months and sometimes it's only half a months worth. Child support is set to the minimum of $321.50 for us right now. He has lived in 5 different states since December 2012. He sees his kids once a year at Christmas. Twice if they're lucky. And talks to them on the phone every few months. Just recently he moved to Nevada. In Nevada you have to have a license to work. He can't get one because of back child support. He originally wanted me to waive the back child support of $3,100 so he could be able to get a job and start paying again. Now he is willing to pay $1,300 towards it and is wanting me to waive the rest. I am worried that this could effect things in the future with my kids. I was told if I waive it, they could get kicked of Soonercare. He was told the amount was below the threshold, and it would be fine. I am also worried that if he threatens me, yet again, to take full custody of my children, waiving it would look bad on my part. And lastly, I am afraid that waiving it could negatively effect the outcome of any future chance of increasing child support.

Is this something that wont affect anything? Or should I just steer clear of it, because there is the possibility, down the road, it would look bad on me. I want to help him, I don't want him to suffer. And him getting a job is in the best interest of the kids. But, I need to make sure my children wont suffer as a result. His mom is swearing that if he doesn't pay back the rest like he promises, she will. If he really can't get a job like he says, it would be better to waive it so he can start working and I can get child support again. I'm just so scared that I'm going to screw myself down the line if I do.

Thank you so much for your time.

Ok, first things first. Based on the fact that he has only seen the children once or twice a year since 2012, there is NO WAY that he could ever possibly get full custody unless you do something truly horrendous, get the children taken away from you by the state AND do not follow the reunification plan to get them back. Those kinds of threats from him are 100% empty.

Yes, its possible that if you waive back child support your children could lose state benefits.

If his mother wants him to be able to get a job so badly, let HER pay his back child support and let him pay HER back. You should not waive the back support at all in my opinion.

 

[Proserpina]

Ok, first things first. Based on the fact that he has only seen the children once or twice a year since 2012, there is NO WAY that he could ever possibly get full custody unless you do something truly horrendous, get the children taken away from you by the state AND do not follow the reunification plan to get them back. Those kinds of threats from him are 100% empty.

Yes, its possible that if you waive back child support your children could lose state benefits.

If his mother wants him to be able to get a job so badly, let HER pay his back child support and let him pay HER back. You should not waive the back support at all in my opinion.

This. A million times.

 

[torimac]

I would definitely not waive back support. You may not get it now, but you will eventually. I personally think I will get my back child support when my ex starts collecting social security.

Regarding the license to work? Only in special field is that required. I used to live in NV and worked in the computer industry. I did not need a license to work, only to drive my car. So, depending on his skills, he might not be telling you the truth. Never trust your ex, especially when they owe you money.