What to do?

[wrongfather]

What is the name of your state? New York


I was with this guy for a few months starting at the end of 2000. We ended it in the beginning of 2001. right after i started talking back to this guy i knew from before then he went to canada. a couple of weeks later i found out that i was pregnant. i thought my baby belonged to the second guy. i took him to court for child support. he didn't want to take the paternity test. he said that he was the father. he has only seen my daughter twice in her life and that was in the first six months of her life. she is now 4 years old. when she was 2 1/2 i took a paternity test with the first guy and it turns out that he is the father. he is apart of her life and she knows that he is daddy. i want to change her name to his. i just don't know how to go about it. i am still receiving child support from the second guy which i do want to end. can i end it without ever having to see him again?What is the name of your state?

 

[fairisfair]

Oh boy, you have got yourself one big mess now. You may well find yourself responsible for repayment to daddy #1, you need an attorney. And by the way, changing your daughters name is the least of your problems and will be the last of your accomplishments with regard to this situation. So you have known now, for OVER A YEAR AND A HALF, that daddy #1 is not the father, and yet, you have allowed him to continue to pay??? I hope you are familiar with the word FRAUD.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

K-Dar**************************************************************************************************......

 

[Shawna]

The 2nd guy should go to court to disestablish paternity. You should have had him do the paternity test anyway just to be sure being that you were with 2 men in such a short period of time.

 

[fairisfair]

K-Dar**************************************************************************************************......

Oh, I don't know, you mean with no smiley faces or anything??

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

Oh, I don't know, you mean with no smiley faces or anything??

She hasn't used to many of those lately, and the way she jumped in on another thread makes it more likely.

Either way OP is pretty scummy for what she did and is doing.

 

[wrongfather]

Oh boy, you have got yourself one big mess now. You may well find yourself responsible for repayment to daddy #1, you need an attorney. And by the way, changing your daughters name is the least of your problems and will be the last of your accomplishments with regard to this situation. So you have known now, for OVER A YEAR AND A HALF, that daddy #1 is not the father, and yet, you have allowed him to continue to pay??? I hope you are familiar with the word FRAUD.

I am familiar with the word FRAUD. The judge made it very clear to him that he can take a paternity test and he chose not to. The judge asked about three times to make sure that was what he wanted. The judge also told him that he couldn't come back to her afterward if he was not the father. once he says he is the father - the courts have him as the father of my daughter. i am not responsible for having to pay him back because he said he is my daughter's father. I want to drop the case because I know it's not morally correct.

 

[AHA]

I am familiar with the word FRAUD. The judge made it very clear to him that he can take a paternity test and he chose not to. The judge asked about three times to make sure that was what he wanted. The judge also told him that he couldn't come back to her afterward if he was not the father. once he says he is the father - the courts have him as the father of my daughter. i am not responsible for having to pay him back because he said he is my daughter's father. I want to drop the case because I know it's not morally correct.

But did he and the judge know that you had had unprotected sex with 2 different men during that very short period of time?
If he didn't, then of course he would feel no doubt in being the father. And if the judge didn't know, then he would have no reason to doubt the certainty of the "alleged" father.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

I am familiar with the word FRAUD. The judge made it very clear to him that he can take a paternity test and he chose not to. The judge asked about three times to make sure that was what he wanted. The judge also told him that he couldn't come back to her afterward if he was not the father. once he says he is the father - the courts have him as the father of my daughter. i am not responsible for having to pay him back because he said he is my daughter's father. I want to drop the case because I know it's not morally correct. Morally correct? You just stated you are not responsible to pay him back. You are pathetic.

 

[AHA]

i am not responsible for having to pay him back because he said he is my daughter's father.

But what will the judge say when he finds out that you have known, with 100% certainty, that he ISN'T the father for 2,5 YEARS? You never know, you might just end up having to pay back what you have received fraudulenty for the past 2,5 years. How much have you been receiving every month in cs?

 

[Neal1421]

What is the name of your state? New York


I was with this guy for a few months starting at the end of 2000. We ended it in the beginning of 2001. right after i started talking back to this guy i knew from before then he went to canada. a couple of weeks later i found out that i was pregnant. i thought my baby belonged to the second guy. i took him to court for child support. he didn't want to take the paternity test. he said that he was the father. he has only seen my daughter twice in her life and that was in the first six months of her life. she is now 4 years old. when she was 2 1/2 i took a paternity test with the first guy and it turns out that he is the father. he is apart of her life and she knows that he is daddy. i want to change her name to his. i just don't know how to go about it. i am still receiving child support from the second guy which i do want to end. can i end it without ever having to see him again?What is the name of your state?

I'm just curious, if you stop the child support from legal daddy because of the bio dad supporting the child and then the bio dad decides he doesn't want anything to do with the child later on, what will you then? Will you go running back to court for child support from the other one because he is the legal daddy?

That's where the problems arise. Legal daddy will need to disestablish paternity via DNA test if you don't want anything to do with him.

You can't just play musical daddies with your child.

 

[CJane]

If this was one of those 'at home' tests, it's likely not even going to be allowed as evidence in court. So, you'll need to figure out how to file in court for disestablishment of Daddy #1's paternity, then establish Daddy #2's paternity, and then file for child support from Daddy #2 and get the case against Daddy #1 dismissed/closed.

THEN you can petition to change the child's name.

 

[nextwife]

I am familiar with the word FRAUD. The judge made it very clear to him that he can take a paternity test and he chose not to. The judge asked about three times to make sure that was what he wanted. [/I][/B]

And did YOU make it very clear it was likely there was another man with equal odds of being the father? HOW could you stand there and even allow a man who might not be daddy to be made responsibly to support your child? How could you continue to accept money KNOWING that YOU had decieved the man, and were still decieving him about PARENTAGE of "his" child? How can you live with yourself?

The faxt that you were sleeping with too many men simultaneously to know who your child's daddy was, should not be made HIS burden.

 

[AHA]

And did YOU make it very clear it was likely there was another man with equal odds of being the father? HOW could you stand there and even allow a man who might not be daddy to be made responsibly to support your child? How could you continue to accept money KNOWING that YOU had decieved the man, and were still decieving him about PARENTAGE of "his" child? How can you live with yourself?

The faxt that you were sleeping with too many men simultaneously to know who your child's daddy was, should not be made HIS burden.

I've asked the same questions, but of course OP isn't answering them. What a surprise!!!

 

[wrongfather]

And did YOU make it very clear it was likely there was another man with equal odds of being the father? HOW could you stand there and even allow a man who might not be daddy to be made responsibly to support your child? How could you continue to accept money KNOWING that YOU had decieved the man, and were still decieving him about PARENTAGE of "his" child? How can you live with yourself?

The faxt that you were sleeping with too many men simultaneously to know who your child's daddy was, should not be made HIS burden.

Yes, Idid make it clear that there was another man. When I found out that I was pregnant, they told me my conception date was on the same day that I slept with the second guy. I did tell him that. He was the one that chose to say he was the father. I am not saying that I am not in the wrong for the FACT (not faxt) that I slept with the both of them too close together. I know I made a mistake and I am trying to rectify it. I'm trying now to stop the checks. I am not making anything HIS burden. I haven't spoken to him in over two years. He does not give a DAMN! about the child that he thinks is his.