What happens if the non-custodial parent is in another country?

[Singleparent81]

I live in New York. I have one child whose father was deported to Africa at the end of 2006. It has been a struggle since then to provide for my child. I have been doing it all by myself since then. I have reached a breaking point. I am not working at this time and need help in supporting her. I have went to ask his family for help and haven't received much help within the last five years. What can I do at this point? Is all hope lost since the child's father is in another country? Is there anything in the law that states that in the absence of the child's father, his immediate family will assume responsibilities in his place? I am looking for some advice on what step to move next because I am so frustrated at this point but I don't want to get rude with his mother/family without knowing any facts.
Thank you for your help.

singleparent81What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[Alex1176]

I live in New York. I have one child whose father was deported to Africa at the end of 2006. It has been a struggle since then to provide for my child. I have been doing it all by myself since then. I have reached a breaking point. I am not working at this time and need help in supporting her. I have went to ask his family for help and haven't received much help within the last five years. What can I do at this point? Is all hope lost since the child's father is in another country? Is there anything in the law that states that in the absence of the child's father, his immediate family will assume responsibilities in his place? I am looking for some advice on what step to move next because I am so frustrated at this point but I don't want to get rude with his mother/family without knowing any facts.
Thank you for your help.

singleparent81What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Which country in Africa?

 

[CourtClerk]

There are two people responsible for the care of a child. The mother and the (legally established) father.

If dad isn't around, then ultimately, it's your responsibility to take care of the child you made. Dad's family is NEVER responsible for the care of your child regardless of where in the world he is. So, you're going to have to do like the rest of us, pull yourself up by the bootstraps and get it together.

 

[mistoffolees]

I live in New York. I have one child whose father was deported to Africa at the end of 2006. It has been a struggle since then to provide for my child. I have been doing it all by myself since then. I have reached a breaking point. I am not working at this time and need help in supporting her. I have went to ask his family for help and haven't received much help within the last five years. What can I do at this point? Is all hope lost since the child's father is in another country? Is there anything in the law that states that in the absence of the child's father, his immediate family will assume responsibilities in his place? I am looking for some advice on what step to move next because I am so frustrated at this point but I don't want to get rude with his mother/family without knowing any facts.
Thank you for your help.

singleparent81What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

No, his family is not legally responsible. Don't even think of going there.

Now, his family may voluntarily wish to contribute and there's nothing wrong with that, but you shouldn't count on it.

Was paternity ever established? If paternity was legally established, you can still open a child support case. If he's in a country which has appropriate treaties with the U.S., you may even be able to collect (but don't count on it). Start by going to your child support enforcement agency to ask what they can do to help.

 

[Singleparent81]

Response to post.

Thank you all for your advice and replies. For that person who said to pull myself up from my bootstrap..uhhhh...been doing that since the day my daughter was born and she is doing well and healthy. I am the only person who has supported my daughter without a break. At some point I need a break. Single parents need a break from time to time so they don't lose it and do anything crazy. It's a way to clear the head and get rid of the built up frustration. But when it comes to my daughter she is well taken care of BY ME!!!!!! Don't get it twisted I was just asking for advice on how to deal with his mother. When it comes to my daughter though I do what I need to do...whether "hook or crook" if need be..... to make sure my daughter has clothes on her back and food in her mouth. I feed her before I feed myself. Don't give me that pull yourself up by the bootstrap crap cause if anything I've made it this far without much of their help. It comes a time in our lives that we hit a snag and need the help whether we have pride or not. Well I set my pride aside crying and all and asked for help and never received it. So this is where my mental is at...ITS MAD AND FRUSTRATED AND WANTS TO BE BITTER but I know I can't really express it because I don't want my baby to see that frustration in me. Thanks again.

 

[Antigone*]

Thank you all for your advice and replies. For that person who said to pull myself up from my bootstrap..uhhhh...been doing that since the day my daughter was born and she is doing well and healthy. I am the only person who has supported my daughter without a break. At some point I need a break. Single parents need a break from time to time so they don't lose it and do anything crazy. It's a way to clear the head and get rid of the built up frustration. But when it comes to my daughter she is well taken care of BY ME!!!!!! Don't get it twisted I was just asking for advice on how to deal with his mother. When it comes to my daughter though I do what I need to do...whether "hook or crook" if need be..... to make sure my daughter has clothes on her back and food in her mouth. I feed her before I feed myself. Don't give me that pull yourself up by the bootstrap crap cause if anything I've made it this far without much of their help. It comes a time in our lives that we hit a snag and need the help whether we have pride or not. Well I set my pride aside crying and all and asked for help and never received it. So this is where my mental is at...ITS MAD AND FRUSTRATED AND WANTS TO BE BITTER but I know I can't really express it because I don't want my baby to see that frustration in me. Thanks again.

Parents, in general don't get breaks until their chldren leave the fold. Sometimes there are two parents involved, sometimes not. It is what it is and before you say it isn't fair ~ buddy life isn't fair.

 

[CSO286]

Thank you all for your advice and replies. For that person who said to pull myself up from my bootstrap..uhhhh...been doing that since the day my daughter was born and she is doing well and healthy. I am the only person who has supported my daughter without a break. At some point I need a break. Single parents need a break from time to time so they don't lose it and do anything crazy. It's a way to clear the head and get rid of the built up frustration. But when it comes to my daughter she is well taken care of BY ME!!!!!! Don't get it twisted I was just asking for advice on how to deal with his mother. When it comes to my daughter though I do what I need to do...whether "hook or crook" if need be..... to make sure my daughter has clothes on her back and food in her mouth. I feed her before I feed myself. Don't give me that pull yourself up by the bootstrap crap cause if anything I've made it this far without much of their help. It comes a time in our lives that we hit a snag and need the help whether we have pride or not. Well I set my pride aside crying and all and asked for help and never received it. So this is where my mental is at...ITS MAD AND FRUSTRATED AND WANTS TO BE BITTER but I know I can't really express it because I don't want my baby to see that frustration in me. Thanks again.

Nope.Whether or not people deserve a break doesn't mean we get one.

And once you become a parent, you give up the right to "take a break".


So says another single parent who rarely sees child support. (And that "rarely"? Means that I get child support more frequently than some other Seniors who haven't rcvd a dime in support.)

 

[CourtClerk]

Thank you all for your advice and replies. For that person who said to pull myself up from my bootstrap..uhhhh...been doing that since the day my daughter was born and she is doing well and healthy. I am the only person who has supported my daughter without a break. At some point I need a break. Single parents need a break from time to time so they don't lose it and do anything crazy. It's a way to clear the head and get rid of the built up frustration. But when it comes to my daughter she is well taken care of BY ME!!!!!! Don't get it twisted I was just asking for advice on how to deal with his mother. When it comes to my daughter though I do what I need to do...whether "hook or crook" if need be..... to make sure my daughter has clothes on her back and food in her mouth. I feed her before I feed myself. Don't give me that pull yourself up by the bootstrap crap cause if anything I've made it this far without much of their help. It comes a time in our lives that we hit a snag and need the help whether we have pride or not. Well I set my pride aside crying and all and asked for help and never received it. So this is where my mental is at...ITS MAD AND FRUSTRATED AND WANTS TO BE BITTER but I know I can't really express it because I don't want my baby to see that frustration in me. Thanks again.

Whatever little girl....
I've seen 2 1/2 years of child support in my child's almost 16 years on this earth, and I haven't had a break since I was pregnant.

So go on somewhere with all that whining.