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Wife Doesn't want to work so Father pays more????

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tamilynn2003

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Florida

My husband has two kids with an ex. One is about to turn 18. The ex-wife conveniently quit her $55K +job, a year and a half ago (she's remarried), to sell real estate in the middle of a plumetting real estate market. This was just an excuse not to have to work. She's sold only 2 or 3 houses in the last year and a half. She is complaining constantly to the kids that she has no money and can't pay for this and can't pay for that. My husband pays $1500 a month for the two kids. The agreement only mentions this amount. Does not mention an amount per child or when it will end, or what happens when one turns 18. She had a lawyer in the divorce and my husband could not afford one. But yet he did have to pay her atty costs.

So now to get the child support adjusted for one child, does this mean we have to put up several thousand dollars to go to court to do this? And also will likely have to pay her atty costs when its over as well since she is sitting home watching HGTV. Also, the thing that has me so upset is the kids came over last night and said she told them their father will have to pay her the same if not more money when the oldest turns 18 because she is not making any money. That is so infuriating. She is using the money he pays for child support to live on and not 100% for the kids. Now he has to pay her MORE because she doesn't want to work at a real job. I did the math on the child support formula and it appears to be true. He will have to pay her more money now because he is actually working and she basically doesn't have to contribute at all. I have no problem paying any expenses for the kids, but aren't any of the courts doing anything to make the mothers accountable in any way shape or form for the money they get? Is there anyway to stop this or make her accountable?
 


Silverplum

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? Florida

My husband has two kids with an ex. One is about to turn 18. The ex-wife conveniently quit her $55K +job, a year and a half ago (she's remarried), to sell real estate in the middle of a plumetting real estate market. This was just an excuse not to have to work. She's sold only 2 or 3 houses in the last year and a half. She is complaining constantly to the kids that she has no money and can't pay for this and can't pay for that. My husband pays $1500 a month for the two kids. The agreement only mentions this amount. Does not mention an amount per child or when it will end, or what happens when one turns 18. She had a lawyer in the divorce and my husband could not afford one. But yet he did have to pay her atty costs.

So now to get the child support adjusted for one child, does this mean we have to put up several thousand dollars to go to court to do this? And also will likely have to pay her atty costs when its over as well since she is sitting home watching HGTV. Also, the thing that has me so upset is the kids came over last night and said she told them their father will have to pay her the same if not more money when the oldest turns 18 because she is not making any money. That is so infuriating. She is using the money he pays for child support to live on and not 100% for the kids. Now he has to pay her MORE because she doesn't want to work at a real job. I did the math on the child support formula and it appears to be true. He will have to pay her more money now because he is actually working and she basically doesn't have to contribute at all. I have no problem paying any expenses for the kids, but aren't any of the courts doing anything to make the mothers accountable in any way shape or form for the money they get? Is there anyway to stop this or make her accountable?
Rule #1: Never listen to legal *advice* from the X.

She's wrong. When one turns 18, Dad can file to modify support. He doesn't need an attorney. A few months before the last one turns 18, Dad can file to emancipate the child, and doesn't need an attorney for that, either.

Mom cannot quit a job to get more $$ in CS. Have Dad ask that her former income be imputed to her in the new calculations.

Better? :)
 

tamilynn2003

Junior Member
Yes that is the best case scenario. But will they ALWAYS impute income to her if requested? If they impute how does that work exactly. If he makes for ex., $10K (and he doesn't make that much just want a round #) a month and she used to make $5K but now only makes $1K, does that mean they base the child support at $15K per month or at the actual of $11K. And her % will be allocated based on her higher wage? I tend to believe what she tells the kids because she has a very famous, expensive attorney in town. And since my husband has never been able to afford one after he pays her bills, she always gets whatever she wants. Again, I'm all for supporting kids, but it seems the mothers can pretty much just do whatever they want. My husband is making 40% more money now than when they got divorced. So she will benefit from his hard work while she's sitting on her ass watching HGTV all day pretending like she doesn't know the real estate market has tanked. There must be some way to make them account for the money they get. And then there is the college issue pending. Seems many states are making the husbands continue to pay for child support while in college along with tuition. Does anyone know if thats becoming the norm in florida if the agreements don't mention it?
 

CJane

Senior Member
While it's completely untrue that Mom could get an increase in CS because she quit working, it IS possible that Dad will end up w/out a reduction or w/an increase in CS even with one child aging out...

Depends on how long it's been since CS was evaluated, what his income has done in the meantime, whether the judge agrees to impute her an income at her actual wage prior to leaving her job, etc.
 

CJane

Senior Member
Yes that is the best case scenario. But will they ALWAYS impute income to her if requested?
Almost always. Unless she can prove that it is impossible for her to continue making the same wage.

If they impute how does that work exactly.
In my state, it's figured in the same as an actual income would be. What would happen is they would figure in her $1000/month plus whatever needed imputed to bring her up to a reasonable income for her education level, work skills, etc.

Again, I'm all for supporting kids, but it seems the mothers can pretty much just do whatever they want.
As can he. She's not asking HIM what he does w/what's left over, is she?

My husband is making 40% more money now than when they got divorced. So she will benefit from his hard work while she's sitting on her ass watching HGTV all day pretending like she doesn't know the real estate market has tanked.
You're sounding more than a little green there darlin.

The CHILDREN will benefit from his increase in income. Her new husband is supporting her, and that's his right. But he is NOT obligated to support YOUR husband's children.

There must be some way to make them account for the money they get.
Nope.

And then there is the college issue pending. Seems many states are making the husbands continue to pay for child support while in college along with tuition. Does anyone know if thats becoming the norm in florida if the agreements don't mention it?
It can almost never be factored in later if not addressed in the original order.
 

tamilynn2003

Junior Member
I don't even pretend not to be angry and bitter about the fact that laws allow my husbands lazy ex-wife to spend my husbands hard earned money for personal use.
 

CJane

Senior Member
I don't even pretend not to be angry and bitter about the fact that laws allow my husbands lazy ex-wife to spend my husbands hard earned money for personal use.
But she only quit her job a year ago... presumably she was using the money for personal use then since it was used to pay bills and all that jazz.

You only developed the bitterness since she quit working?
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
I don't even pretend not to be angry and bitter about the fact that laws allow my husbands lazy ex-wife to spend my husbands hard earned money for personal use.
Well, that's your choice.

Fact is, it's none of your business, legally. So if you give it the importance it's worth, which is nil, then you will not be so worried about it.

You chose to marry a man who pays CS. Don't squawk about it now. Those are his children and he is required by law to support them. That's the beginning, middle, and end of it.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
Does that mean that IF at the time of the original divorce/support agreement, if the parents did NOT specify college expenses to be paid by so-n-so, does that mean that if the parents to go back to court to modify visitation and/or support in the future, that they can NOT modify the college issue (assuming they are not in agreement on the issue of college expenses of course).
thanks
In MOST states, that's correct. I dunno about FL fer shur. :cool: Check Gracie's posts with the link I gave -- she just addressed that q a day or two ago. ;)
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I don't even pretend not to be angry and bitter about the fact that laws allow my husbands lazy ex-wife to spend my husbands hard earned money for personal use.
You are making an assumption that she is using it for personal use rather than assuming that her husband is supporting her.

Your husband's child support is covering his children's share of the household expenses...that doesn't mean that its being spent on mom.

Look...I am sorry but that kind of jealously and bitterness is not going to make life better for you.

Do a google search for an online CS calculator for FL...run the numbers as if she has a minimum wage income, then run the numbers as if she has a 55k income like she had before. See if it really makes a signficant difference.
 

tamilynn2003

Junior Member
I only developed the bitterness since she showed her true colors by telling the kids that their dad was going to have to pay her more money after one turned 18 because she wasn't working.

If she wants to struggle and do without things because she's too lazy to work thats her right. But i've been bothered by the fact that she's causing the kids to do without things and causing them quite alot of stress constantly complaining about her lack of money. They shouldn't have to hear or deal with that issue when their dad is sending that much money their way each month. Their dad also left their mom a house that was almost paid for in the divorce. Which she promptly remortgaged to many times its original loan value so she could afford her Volvo's while she bought their son a 15 year old used car that is a safety hazzard. She is a good mother and its not like she's deprving them of food or electricity, but still the point of the sliding income scale child support is that they are suppossed to have a certain standard of living based on their parents income. And they are not enjoying that, but instead having to hear about their mothers financial problems. And her solution is to SUCK more out of her ex instead of getting a real job. And the courts will likely allow it to happen to some degree. How could that not make a spouse mad?
 

Gracie3787

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? Florida

My husband has two kids with an ex. One is about to turn 18. The ex-wife conveniently quit her $55K +job, a year and a half ago (she's remarried), to sell real estate in the middle of a plumetting real estate market. This was just an excuse not to have to work. She's sold only 2 or 3 houses in the last year and a half. She is complaining constantly to the kids that she has no money and can't pay for this and can't pay for that. My husband pays $1500 a month for the two kids. The agreement only mentions this amount. Does not mention an amount per child or when it will end, or what happens when one turns 18. She had a lawyer in the divorce and my husband could not afford one. But yet he did have to pay her atty costs.

So now to get the child support adjusted for one child, does this mean we have to put up several thousand dollars to go to court to do this? And also will likely have to pay her atty costs when its over as well since she is sitting home watching HGTV. Also, the thing that has me so upset is the kids came over last night and said she told them their father will have to pay her the same if not more money when the oldest turns 18 because she is not making any money. That is so infuriating. She is using the money he pays for child support to live on and not 100% for the kids. Now he has to pay her MORE because she doesn't want to work at a real job. I did the math on the child support formula and it appears to be true. He will have to pay her more money now because he is actually working and she basically doesn't have to contribute at all. I have no problem paying any expenses for the kids, but aren't any of the courts doing anything to make the mothers accountable in any way shape or form for the money they get? Is there anyway to stop this or make her accountable?
The court WILL impute an income to the ex, even if it's only what she was earning before. In Florida an imputation of income is mandatory for any unemployed, or underemployed parent who is not disabled.

You mentioned that your husband is earning alot more now then before. using his present income and his ex's previous income, you can run the numbers on a calculator to see how much the CS might decrease. It's possible though that it will increase even for only one child, if his income has increased alot.

He doesn't need an attorney to file, he can get the forms by going to www.flcourts.org and clicking on family law forms. Other sites that will help is the CS statutes in chapter 61 at www.flsenate.gov/STATUTES .

Because the modification will be filed due to a child emanciapting, it's unlikely that the court will order him to pay his ex's attorney's fees, but it is a small possibility.

edited to add: Florida doesn't have any statutes that allow for CS past age 19 (unless child is disabled) or for college support. Even in situations where the parents agree on college support or CS past age 19, the court cannot enforce the order past age 19.
 
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tamilynn2003

Junior Member
Gracie, thank you so much for your unbiased and factual advice. I think it will be very helpful in helping us avoid un-necessary legal fees for resolving this issue!!
 

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