Please Help: Former Boyfriend Won't Return Property.

[GasmaskGirl]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Louisiana

Hey everyone,
My former boyfriend and I broke up in the fall of last year and he decided to move back to his home state. When we first got together I stayed with him and his family for 6 months and left my very expensive guitar there because we left in such a hurry. Anyway, I always intended to get my guitar back some way whether driving up to get it or pay for it to be sent back to me. I even attempted to get it back before we broke things off several times but it just never happened. Now, he claims the guitar is his mother's because it was left there for several years. They both know it's mine and I have the original receipt for it. Is it really abandoned if I made attempts to get it returned? At first he agreed to send it back (I offered several times to have ups go there and pick it up on my dime.) if I would send him things I bought during the relationship and I refused because I didn't think he deserved it considering he lived here rent free and basically didn't pay for anything. Now, I feel I have no other choice but to go ahead and send those things but he refuses to respond to me. I even contacted his mother and she won't respond either. I really don't know what to do at this point because he is in KY and I'm in LA. I didn't want to involve the law but I'm worried they are going to sell it because they just won't respond. What can I do about this? This guitar is not only sentimental it's worth thousands and they know it.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thanks.

 

[latigo]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Louisiana

Hey everyone,
My former boyfriend and I broke up in the fall of last year and he decided to move back to his home state. When we first got together I stayed with him and his family for 6 months and left my very expensive guitar there because we left in such a hurry.

Anyway, I always intended to get my guitar back some way whether driving up to get it or pay for it to be sent back to me. I even attempted to get it back before we broke things off several times but it just never happened. Now, he claims the guitar is his mother's because it was left there for several years. They both know it's mine and I have the original receipt for it. Is it really abandoned if I made attempts to get it returned?

At first he agreed to send it back (I offered several times to have ups go there and pick it up on my dime.) if I would send him things I bought during the relationship and I refused because I didn't think he deserved it considering he lived here rent free and basically didn't pay for anything.

Now, I feel I have no other choice but to go ahead and send those things but he refuses to respond to me. I even contacted his mother and she won't respond either.

I really don't know what to do at this point because he is in KY and I'm in LA. I didn't want to involve the law but I'm worried they are going to sell it because they just won't respond. What can I do about this? This guitar is not only sentimental it's worth thousands and they know it.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thanks.

Fuhgeddaboudit!

For several practical and legal reasons you've undoubtedly seen that last of your string slinger. If you are indeed so innocent as not to understand the difficulties involved in attempting to retrieve it or its value, I will be happy to explain.

 

[GasmaskGirl]

Please explain.

I have proof that the guitar is indeed mine including the original receipt, so the value is already known.

 

[quincy]

While I can see some of the possible practical reasons latigo mentions (e.g., different states make retrieval more difficult, you are an ex-girlfriend, you are holding the ex-boyfriend's property), I am not sure I see the legal reasons why you cannot seek the return of your guitar.

Although I am admittedly not comfortable with Kentucky or Louisiana laws in this area, it does not seem to me that your guitar would be considered abandoned property but rather mislaid property and, thus, the holder of the property would be obligated to return it to you, especially since you have contacted both your former boyfriend and his mom and expressed an interest in its return - and, in fact, you say you have tried in the past to make arrangements for its return.

Exactly how long has the guitar been in the mom's possession?

latigo, or anyone, is there some reason (other than, perhaps, the passage of time) that might preclude recovery?

 

[GasmaskGirl]

While I can see some of the possible practical reasons latigo mentions (e.g., different states make retrieval more difficult, you are an ex-girlfriend, you are holding the ex-boyfriend's property), I am not sure I see the legal reasons why you cannot seek the return of your guitar.

Although I am admittedly not comfortable with Kentucky or Louisiana laws in this area, it does not seem to me that your guitar would be considered abandoned property but rather mislaid property and, thus, the holder of the property would be obligated to return it to you, especially since you have contacted both your former boyfriend and his mom and expressed an interest in its return - and, in fact, you say you have tried in the past to make arrangements for its return.

Exactly how long has the guitar been in the mom's possession?

latigo, or anyone, is there some reason (other than, perhaps, the passage of time) that might preclude recovery?

The guitar has been in her possession for about 5 years and through those 5 years she always acknowledged it was mine. Only when I broke up with her son did it suddenly become "abandoned". I tried several times to work out getting it shipped here (on my expense of course) but something would always come up and at those times I wasn't really worried about not being able to not get it back at some point.

I do have some things of his that I haven't sent yet because I'm scared once I do that I will be screwed more than I already am. I have no problem in sending his personal property, the only thing I had a problem with was a computer we built together. I now don't see it as an issue, I just want my guitar back.

 

[quincy]

The guitar has been in her possession for about 5 years and through those 5 years she always acknowledged it was mine. Only when I broke up with her son did it suddenly become "abandoned". I tried several times to work out getting it shipped here (on my expense of course) but something would always come up and at those times I wasn't really worried about not being able to not get it back at some point.

I do have some things of his that I haven't sent yet because I'm scared once I do that I will be screwed more than I already am. I have no problem in sending his personal property, the only thing I had a problem with was a computer we built together. I now don't see it as an issue, I just want my guitar back.

Maybe it is time for a road trip.

Here is a suggestion: Pack up all of your ex-boyfriend's belongings that you still have, contact the mom and the ex-boyfriend and inform them of your expected arrival date and time and location for exchange. For the location, call ahead to the local sheriff's department and use that department for the property-exchange. If the ex-boyfriend or mom do not meet for the exchange at the designated time on the designated date, have a sheriff accompany you to the mom's home to pick up your guitar.

Make sure you take with you your proof of ownership in the guitar (and it might be smart before your trip to make sure the mom has not already disposed of the guitar).

Or you can consult with an attorney in your area and have the attorney send off a letter to the mom, demanding the return of the guitar.

Again, I am not aware of any law that prevents you from seeking the return of your guitar. An attorney in Kentucky or in your area can advise you better on your rights.

 

[latigo]

While I can see some of the possible practical reasons latigo mentions (e.g., different states make retrieval more difficult, you are an ex-girlfriend, you are holding the ex-boyfriend's property), I am not sure I see the legal reasons why you cannot seek the return of your guitar.

Although I am admittedly not comfortable with Kentucky or Louisiana laws in this area, it does not seem to me that your guitar would be considered abandoned property but rather mislaid property and, thus, the holder of the property would be obligated to return it to you, (?) especially since you have contacted both your former boyfriend and his mom and expressed an interest in its return - and, in fact, you say you have tried in the past to make arrangements for its return.

Exactly how long has the guitar been in the mom's possession?

latigo, or anyone, is there some reason (other than, perhaps, the passage of time) that might preclude recovery?

Well of course there is Kentucky's two year statute of limitation on actions to recover possession of personal property. *

I can't come up with anything else other than, perhaps the "doctrine of laches" . (Assuming, it is alive and well in those Appalachian "hollers".)

(Not that we are given to know how long it has been since OP and her then "sweetie pie" left Kentucky and "mom's apron" in the middle of the night.)
____________________

Now, with regard to the duties of the possessor of the guitar.

Obviously the circumstances here don't reflect any intention on the part of the OP to "abandon" her "priceless" guitar. As you have recalled she has consistently proclaimed her rights of ownership.

But I'm uncertain as to your meaning where you write that if the item is not deemed abandoned that "the holder of the property" would be obligated to return it to the rightful owner.

If by that expression you mean that the holder is legally obligated to exercise any special effort to see to its return - other than to personally hand it over to the OP (or her authorized agent) if she calls for it - then I must disagree.

My feeling is that the OP is of the opinion that "mom" or whomever is under some legal duty to go to the trouble of packaging up the instrument and arrange for a carrier to deliver it to her.

In this she is much mistaken and would be equally mistaken to assume that such an obligation would be imposed were the OP to advance "mom" the money required to defray the costs.
_________________


[*] "Kentucky Revised Statutes Section 413.125 . . . . . . An action for the taking, detaining or injuring of personal property, including an
action for specific recovery shall be commenced within two (2) years from the time the cause of action accrued."

 

[quincy]

Well of course there is Kentucky's two year statute of limitation on actions to recover possession of personal property. *

I can't come up with anything else other than, perhaps the "doctrine of laches" . (Assuming, it is alive and well in those Appalachian "hollers".)

(Not that we are given to know how long it has been since OP and her then "sweetie pie" left Kentucky and "mom's apron" in the middle of the night.)
____________________

Now, with regard to the duties of the possessor of the guitar.

Obviously the circumstances here don't reflect any intention on the part of the OP to "abandon" her "priceless" guitar. As you have recalled she has consistently proclaimed her rights of ownership.

But I'm uncertain as to your meaning where you write that if the item is not deemed abandoned that "the holder of the property" would be obligated to return it to the rightful owner.

If by that expression you mean that the holder is legally obligated to exercise any special effort to see to its return - other than to personally hand it over to the OP (or her authorized agent) if she calls for it - then I must disagree.

My feeling is that the OP is of the opinion that "mom" or whomever is under some legal duty to go to the trouble of packaging up the instrument and arrange for a carrier to deliver it to her.

In this she is much mistaken and would be equally mistaken to assume that such an obligation would be imposed were the OP to advance "mom" the money required to defray the costs.
_________________


[*] "Kentucky Revised Statutes Section 413.125 . . . . . . An action for the taking, detaining or injuring of personal property, including an
action for specific recovery shall be commenced within two (2) years from the time the cause of action accrued."

Thanks for the information, latigo.

I could only find a statute for "theft of property lost, mislaid or delivered by mistake." The elements of this Class D misdemeanor (for property valued at between $500 and $10,000) include an intent to deprive an owner of his/her property or a failure to take reasonable measures to restore the property to the owner.

And I was pretty sure that did not apply to the situation described here because, just as I do not see the guitar as having been abandoned, I do not see the guitar as being stolen.

I believe the retrieval of the guitar rests on GasmaskGirl and not on the mom, which was the major reason for my "road trip" suggestion.

 

[Just Blue]

Thanks for the information, latigo.

I could only find a statute for "theft of property lost, mislaid or delivered by mistake." The elements of this Class D misdemeanor (for property valued at between $500 and $10,000) include an intent to deprive an owner of his/her property or a failure to take reasonable measures to restore the property to the owner.

And I was pretty sure that did not apply to the situation described here because, just as I do not see the guitar as having been abandoned, I do not see the guitar as being stolen.

I believe the retrieval of the guitar rests on GasmaskGirl and not on the mom, which was the major reason for my "road trip" suggestion.

I have to wonder why OP did not take the big bucks geetar with her when she left the home.

 

[latigo]

I have to wonder why OP did not take the big bucks geetar with her when she left the home.

Maybe the law was at the front door and they left by the back. . . . . somewhat "strung out".

 

[GasmaskGirl]

First of all, I have never expected his mother nor him to foot the bill on anything. I've offered to pay for everything, even arrange for UPS to pick up the guitar at a convenient time for them. All I asked was that they get it packed properly so that the guitar wouldn't be damaged in shipment. (I offered to reimburse for packing costs as well.) Even before we broke it off, I've always took responsibility for costs. So, I don't know where you're getting that I'm trying to push costs onto them.

Second, I left there in a hurry because of a family death and I couldn't very well take EVERY single thing I brought back at the time. It wasn't anything as scandalous as you're making it seem. I intended on getting it back way sooner, but like I said the issue was never forced because I always thought I could get it back anytime I wanted it.

Anyways, what I'm getting is the only way to get it back is to physically go there and swap things.
Thanks for all your help.

 

[quincy]

First of all, I have never expected his mother nor him to foot the bill on anything. I've offered to pay for everything, even arrange for UPS to pick up the guitar at a convenient time for them. All I asked was that they get it packed properly so that the guitar wouldn't be damaged in shipment. (I offered to reimburse for packing costs as well.) Even before we broke it off, I've always took responsibility for costs. So, I don't know where you're getting that I'm trying to push costs onto them.

Second, I left there in a hurry because of a family death and I couldn't very well take EVERY single thing I brought back at the time. It wasn't anything as scandalous as you're making it seem. I intended on getting it back way sooner, but like I said the issue was never forced because I always thought I could get it back anytime I wanted it.

Anyways, what I'm getting is the only way to get it back is to physically go there and swap things.
Thanks for all your help.

That may not be the only way to get back your guitar but it could very well be the easiest way.

Good luck.

 

[Just Blue]

First of all, I have never expected his mother nor him to foot the bill on anything. I've offered to pay for everything, even arrange for UPS to pick up the guitar at a convenient time for them. All I asked was that they get it packed properly so that the guitar wouldn't be damaged in shipment. (I offered to reimburse for packing costs as well.) Even before we broke it off, I've always took responsibility for costs. So, I don't know where you're getting that I'm trying to push costs onto them.

Second, I left there in a hurry because of a family death and I couldn't very well take EVERY single thing I brought back at the time. It wasn't anything as scandalous as you're making it seem. I intended on getting it back way sooner, but like I said the issue was never forced because I always thought I could get it back anytime I wanted it.

Anyways, what I'm getting is the only way to get it back is to physically go there and swap things.
Thanks for all your help.

I live with a someone who owns a 20K geetar. He would not leave it behind. He might leave the tightywhiteies in the drawer...but not the geetar.

Why didn't you just plop it on you shoulder and take it with you??

 

[quincy]

She explained there was a family death - a guitar was probably not needed.

Plus, it would not be unusual to leave behind belongings if you were still in a relationship and felt you could pick up the guitar at any time. The relationship did not end until later.