Whether or not this is a joke, you came here for advice. Not sure if this will help but I have a little story that fits this question . . .
My father’s best friend of 35 years came home one day to find out that his wife had committed suicide. In her letter to him, she told him that she owed hundreds of thousands of dollars in credit card debts. He found a stack of these credit cards, nearly 30, all maxed out and an average of $20,000 each.
She said that this was the only way she could think of to end this debt, by taking her own life, since her name was the only one on the bills. And he could use her life insurance policy to help with any other financial problems like her funeral and lost income. However, she didn’t realize that even though some of the bills were in her maiden name that ALL of the bills fell onto him and he was responsible. And the life insurance was null and void because she took her own life.
My father had to help him pay the debts, the funeral, get him a job because he lost his business. He told my father that if it weren’t for him, HE would have committed suicide also. He became a broken man after that. Heartbroken from his wife not trusting him enough to confide in him. Broken financially because he went from a successful businessman with 3 bank accounts, CD’s and investments to a man that had to borrow money from friends to pay for groceries. He lost his business, his investments, his standing in the community and his wife.
It’s been 12 years and he’s STILL slowly trying to get his life back together. The most depressing thought is that if she had confided in him, they could have paid off the debts in a couple of years and she’d still be alive.
Nobody can tell you what to do with your life, but please think about my dad’s friend. We’ve had family members and friends take the “easy way out” thinking it would be easier on us but it just hurt us more. You can’t take back yesterday but you can ask for help from family or friends.
I can honestly say that things will get better. I also contemplated suicide many times. I was molested at 4; raped at 12 and 16; fondled by my father’s friends (he didn’t know); had to quit college to work and help pay for my older sister to go; a friend stole $10,000, got me evicted, and ruined my credit; was homeless for a year (slept in my car and I had 3 jobs to pay back the $10,000) . . . the list goes on and on.
But, now I’m a 33 year old happily married woman of two years with a 3-week old baby girl and I’m really REALLY happy that I chose to live. Sh*t still happens to me, but my husband helps me through it by giving me advice and standing beside me. And knowing that someone loves you no matter what happens makes you believe that you can get through anything. It's been two years since our wedding but I still get an anniversary card and present on the 23rd of EACH month and he tells me nearly ten times a day how much he loves me.
Sometimes, the simple knowledge of someone going through it with you helps to get you over the crisis and gives you the courage to go on.
You decide what’s best for you
and your family. But please keep in mind what your family and friends will go through before you decide. If your husband really loves you and believes that the both of you are united together in good times and bad - he'll understand your troubles and he'll help you through.
Hugs and Kisses,
HugABear
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A hug a day keeps the Prozac away . . .
. . . Have YOU hugged your Teddy Bear today ?