Closed Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 21
  1. #1
    katiekat is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    2

    do not want my debt to fall on husband when commit suicide

    What is the name of your state? North Carolina

    I am married and have large debt in my name and in my and my husbands name on credit cards. When I commit suicide will he be responsible for the credit cards that are only in my name? If so, will he be responsible if I file for divorce and move out for those cards? If I take his name off of cards he was added on, will those apply the same way? I do not want to leave him with my debt, so am trying to figure this all out so as not to make it any worse. I just need to know under what circumstances will he not be liable for credit card debt.
  2. #2
    Veronica1228 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Connecticut
    Posts
    3,591
    Quote Originally Posted by katiekat
    What is the name of your state? North Carolina

    I am married and have large debt in my name and in my and my husbands name on credit cards. When I commit suicide will he be responsible for the credit cards that are only in my name? If so, will he be responsible if I file for divorce and move out for those cards? If I take his name off of cards he was added on, will those apply the same way? I do not want to leave him with my debt, so am trying to figure this all out so as not to make it any worse. I just need to know under what circumstances will he not be liable for credit card debt.
    I really hope this is a joke. Either way, I am not answering your question. Please get help immediately and do not do what you are thinking. Below are a couple of links to get you started.

    [url]http://www.suicide-helplines.org/[/url]

    [url]http://www.suicidehotlines.com/[/url]
  3. #3
    Shay-Pari'e is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Bay Area, CA
    Posts
    10,184
    Please seek some help.
  4. #4
    loveluray is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    7

    Unhappy suicide

    Katie, if you really do this you will have left your family with far more to deal with than bills. Obviously you must care if you even posted a question like this. Utilize the links offered to you from the replies to you question. You will NOT regret it. Good luck and God bless.
  5. #5
    D2nawoman is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Posts
    11
    suicide is not a way out of anything only the beginning of eternal suffering.
    seek God! I keep you in prayers follow the links given above... or call the suicide line and get help!
  6. #6
    warmocom is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    13
    Please listen

    My wife attempted suicide on several occassions. All attempts failed for some reason or another.

    If you even attempt suicide, it has a much worse affect on your WHOLE family .. the ones you love and the one that love you.

    The abyss you are staring at looks over-whelming. There are avenue you can seek and go to that will help you get through this.

    Instead of helping your family by committing suicide, let your family help you get through this.

    I have HOPE for you and I have FAITH in you.
  7. #7
    russeal is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    28
    If your state is a shared property state, then at the time of your death, by any means, your husband would probably be responsible for those debts, even those that have in only your name on them. So suicide is not an answer to your problems, any of them.

    If your marriage is already insolvent, perhaps with a divorce settlement you could be made the main responsible person. If you fail to pay, that doesn't mean they would not still bother your husband.

    If you marriage is any where near good, you need counsel in a lot of ways.
    You may want to try budhibbs.com for some advice on your credit cards.
    Maybe someone in your church or comuunity can help you resolve other problems, and I am sure the web sites already listed can be of help.

    There is alway hope and help out there.
  8. #8
    Veronica1228 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Connecticut
    Posts
    3,591
    Quote Originally Posted by russeal
    If your state is a shared property state, then at the time of your death, by any means, your husband would probably be responsible for those debts, even those that have in only your name on them. So suicide is not an answer to your problems, any of them.

    If your marriage is already insolvent, perhaps with a divorce settlement you could be made the main responsible person. If you fail to pay, that doesn't mean they would not still bother your husband.

    If you marriage is any where near good, you need counsel in a lot of ways.
    You may want to try budhibbs.com for some advice on your credit cards.
    Maybe someone in your church or comuunity can help you resolve other problems, and I am sure the web sites already listed can be of help.

    There is alway hope and help out there.
    North Carolina is NOT a marital property state.
  9. #9
    Veronica1228 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Connecticut
    Posts
    3,591
    Quote Originally Posted by I AM ALWAYS LIABLE
    My response:

    How would YOU like it if someone told YOU how to live your life? How would YOU like it if someone told you that you couldn't get pregnant? How would YOU like it if someone told you that you couldn't have an abortion? And the list goes on and on.

    IAAL
    Um...hello. I do have someone telling me all of those things. I have a mother you know!

    Look, let's just agree to disagree. I'm not in the mood to fight today. I'm a lover not a fighter!
  10. #10
    Veronica1228 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Connecticut
    Posts
    3,591
    Quote Originally Posted by I AM ALWAYS LIABLE
    My response:

    Well, you've already said that you had a headache, and didn't want a "pickle tickle." So, what's left - - but a good old-fashioned, knock down, drag out, FIGHT?

    IAAL
    I have a headache ONE TIME (last night) and now I'm an idiot?

    I told you that I'm not going to fight with you. I decided not to give advice to this OP based on my own opinions about suicide and such. That was MY choice. You might not care if this person kills herself, but I do. If that makes me a "bleeding heart liberal idiot," then so be it.
  11. #11
    hugabear is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Louisiana
    Posts
    6
    Whether or not this is a joke, you came here for advice. Not sure if this will help but I have a little story that fits this question . . .

    My fatherís best friend of 35 years came home one day to find out that his wife had committed suicide. In her letter to him, she told him that she owed hundreds of thousands of dollars in credit card debts. He found a stack of these credit cards, nearly 30, all maxed out and an average of $20,000 each.

    She said that this was the only way she could think of to end this debt, by taking her own life, since her name was the only one on the bills. And he could use her life insurance policy to help with any other financial problems like her funeral and lost income. However, she didnít realize that even though some of the bills were in her maiden name that ALL of the bills fell onto him and he was responsible. And the life insurance was null and void because she took her own life.

    My father had to help him pay the debts, the funeral, get him a job because he lost his business. He told my father that if it werenít for him, HE would have committed suicide also. He became a broken man after that. Heartbroken from his wife not trusting him enough to confide in him. Broken financially because he went from a successful businessman with 3 bank accounts, CDís and investments to a man that had to borrow money from friends to pay for groceries. He lost his business, his investments, his standing in the community and his wife.

    Itís been 12 years and heís STILL slowly trying to get his life back together. The most depressing thought is that if she had confided in him, they could have paid off the debts in a couple of years and sheíd still be alive.

    Nobody can tell you what to do with your life, but please think about my dadís friend. Weíve had family members and friends take the ďeasy way outĒ thinking it would be easier on us but it just hurt us more. You canít take back yesterday but you can ask for help from family or friends.

    I can honestly say that things will get better. I also contemplated suicide many times. I was molested at 4; raped at 12 and 16; fondled by my fatherís friends (he didnít know); had to quit college to work and help pay for my older sister to go; a friend stole $10,000, got me evicted, and ruined my credit; was homeless for a year (slept in my car and I had 3 jobs to pay back the $10,000) . . . the list goes on and on.

    But, now Iím a 33 year old happily married woman of two years with a 3-week old baby girl and Iím really REALLY happy that I chose to live. Sh*t still happens to me, but my husband helps me through it by giving me advice and standing beside me. And knowing that someone loves you no matter what happens makes you believe that you can get through anything. It's been two years since our wedding but I still get an anniversary card and present on the 23rd of EACH month and he tells me nearly ten times a day how much he loves me.

    Sometimes, the simple knowledge of someone going through it with you helps to get you over the crisis and gives you the courage to go on.

    You decide whatís best for you and your family. But please keep in mind what your family and friends will go through before you decide. If your husband really loves you and believes that the both of you are united together in good times and bad - he'll understand your troubles and he'll help you through.

    Hugs and Kisses,

    HugABear

    _____

    A hug a day keeps the Prozac away . . .
    . . . Have YOU hugged your Teddy Bear today ?
  12. #12
    Mister Darcy is offline Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Pemberly
    Posts
    476
    Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
  13. #13
    Karankawan is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    21
    Quote Originally Posted by I AM ALWAYS LIABLE
    My response:

    Oh, please. All of you "bleeding heart" liberals are driving this country right into the ground.

    If the woman wants to "off" herself, who the hell are we to convince her otherwise? Life is tough for some people. That's a fact. Some people are better off dead, and who, but themselves, know this better than any of us?

    Besides, this country has over 280 MILLION people. Do you really believe this one woman is going to make a dent or a difference whether she lives or dies?

    Leave her alone, you bunch of Liberal idiots!

    IAAL

    Once again that legal mind was overridden by the alligator mouth...

    Your views are more liberal than any other post in this forum...

    You offer no valid advice substanciated by legal proceedings or legal laws...

    For someone that has 35.5k posts in this advice forum and 30+ years as a lawyer your track record is plain to see...You live by an unethical code of behavior just to cause confusion...

    If you do not have something good to say and substanciate your claims you should not say anything...

    I have been analysing your post and nothing I have read so far merits the worth to print on toilet paper much less stand in a court of law. I really fell sorry for all of those you represent and that explains why the left coast has no justice system to speak of and Defense attorneys continue to garner large victories there by continually showing Prosecution the way to the door...

    I feel you are working on a different planet than what this forum advertises to be...but, I do respect the impressive years you have within the legal industry...I wish you would put the experience to work within the forum with documented/legal representation unless that is a farce you have profiled...

    By the way, you do not have to help on my post, I feel more comfortable researching myself...besides, credit card debt is left to the surviving spouse on all occassions...the best current option is to seek out a home equity line of credit to get the lower interest rate, go to debt counseling for one low monthly fee, or let them go to the collector to negotiate lower rates and payments. She is not the first to ever comtemplate the issue of suicide when in debt but, there are a lot more things to consider than just do it!!!

    Do not forget the financial burden of funeral cost, day care added to monthly of a single parent, and the loved ones you will leave behind that care for you...those are the ones that will suffer, not the easy road out of suicide...
  14. #14
    Veronica1228 is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Connecticut
    Posts
    3,591
    Quote Originally Posted by Karankawan
    ...besides, credit card debt is left to the surviving spouse on all occassions...the best current option is to seek out a home equity line of credit to get the lower interest rate, go to debt counseling for one low monthly fee, or let them go to the collector to negotiate lower rates and payments. She is not the first to ever comtemplate the issue of suicide when in debt but, there are a lot more things to consider than just do it!!!

    Do not forget the financial burden of funeral cost, day care added to monthly of a single parent, and the loved ones you will leave behind that care for you...those are the ones that will suffer, not the easy road out of suicide...
    Aw shoot. I wasn't going to post on this thread anymore, and then you had to come along with a bunch of fallacies that I just can't let slide.

    First of all, credit card debt is NOT left to the surviving spouse on all occasions. Most states are not community property states which means that the spouse is not obligated to pay on it. If someone dies with debt, and there is an estate then the proceeds from this estate must be used to pay off any outstanding obligations first. If the estate is insolvent, then the debt collectors get zip.

    Second of all, why would anyone want to put their house up to cover unsecured debts? Do you want to lose your house? Believe me this is the worst idea.

    I take it back. The worst idea is to go to credit counseling or debt consolidation companies. I have not heard ONE positive thing on any of these establishments. Usually what happens is that you get ripped off and end up in a worse position than you were before.

    You can just let them go to collections, but that doesn't mean that the CCC or the CA will negotiate a lower amount. They don't have to and often don't. They want their money, just as you would if you loaned your cousin $5,000 and he refused to pay you back.

    I'm not sure where you got all of these ideas from, but believe me you are headed in the wrong direction.
    Last edited by Veronica1228; 06-26-2005 at 04:10 PM.
  15. #15
    Karankawan is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    21

    Wink

    Quote Originally Posted by Veronica1228
    Aw shoot. I wasn't going to post on this thread anymore, and then you had to come along with a bunch of fallacies that I just can't let slide.

    First of all, credit card debt is NOT left to the surviving spouse on all occasions. Most states are not community property states which means that the spouse is not obligated to pay on it. If someone dies with debt, and there is an estate then the proceeds from this estate must be used to pay off any outstanding obligations first. If the estate is insolvent, then the debt collectors get zip.

    If the debted credit cards contain both names there is no way around it unless the cards are insured...and the insurance doesn't cover suicide...plus an insolvent estate would not include a husband wife team...


    Quote Originally Posted by Veronica1228
    Second of all, why would anyone want to put their house up to cover unsecured debts? Do you want to lose your house? Believe me this is the worst idea.
    I beg to differ on this option. If the house has equity value then they could borrow against the house to lower interest rates and minimal payments by as much as 20%+...and to think yet of a house verses a life...Did I miss something here?
    Quote Originally Posted by Veronica1228
    I take it back. The worst idea is to go to credit counseling or debt consolidation companies. I have not heard ONE positive thing on any of these establishments. Usually what happens is that you get ripped off and end up in a worse position than you were before.

    Wow!!! just because you have not heard of success with credit counseling or debt consolidation does not mean it doesn't work? Often times once again you can reduce your debt by thousands of dollars by making a few right decisions. A lot of these companies actually assist individuals in lowering their debt by setting a minimum low payment and doing away with the credit cards all together, which in essence, this person needs...and you don't get ripped in the process...do the research your answer stands with no merit...


    Quote Originally Posted by Veronica1228
    You can just let them go to collections, but that doesn't mean that the CCC or the CA will negotiate a lower amount. They don't have to and often don't. They want their money, just as you would if you loaned your cousin $5,000 and he refused to pay you back.

    I'm not sure where you got all of these ideas from, but believe me you are headed in the wrong direction.

    Collection is the last options and only because the federal government does not allow credit card debt bankruptcy now...we have a big business government in charge now...This option definitly beats the original idea of bangin' the monkey...

Similar Threads

  1. husband threatening to commit me
    By r3divory in forum Divorce, Separation & Annulment
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 04-07-2010, 01:33 PM
  2. Divorced with 50/50 placement, my boyfriend tried to commit suicide
    By angelainwi in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 09-28-2009, 02:13 PM
  3. Custody for husband after 2 suicide attempts??
    By newstart39 in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 07-12-2009, 05:34 AM
  4. Is enticing someone to commit suicide a crime?
    By snickers57 in forum Other Personal Injury and Wrongful Death
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 06-20-2009, 11:07 AM
  5. Mom tried to commit suicide
    By P McC in forum Child Custody & Visitation
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 06-24-2005, 05:47 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

© 1995-2012 Advice Company, All Rights Reserved

FreeAdvice® has been providing millions of consumers with outstanding advice, free, since 1995. While not a substitute for personal advice from a licensed professional, it is available AS IS, subject to our Disclaimer and Terms & Conditions Of Use.