What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Minnesota
I need advice or ideas for a solution to the issues I am having with my ex. The divorce took place in Minnesota in February of 2010. We have 2 joint children who are minors, and she has 3 children from prior relationships (ages 18, 20, and 32). There are 3 major issues.
The first issue has to do with child support, medical bills, and taxes. The decree states that I am to provide insurance coverage for our joint children, medical expenses are split evenly between me and my ex, and that so long as I am current on child support, I get to claim one of the two children on taxes. I opt to have Minnesota garnish my wages so I am never behind on child support and always have a paper trail to prove it. I have never been late or missed a payment, and I have always provided insurance coverage. The issue is that she also has coverage on the children because she has a family plan to cover her other children so covering our joint children costs her nothing extra. She also takes the children to her insurance's network providers which do not honor my insurance. She then sends the entire pre-insurance bill to me and tells me I have to pay half of the full bill. I have refused because it is my understanding that medical bills are split only after insurance has paid. She refuses to tell me how much insurance has paid or even if it has been remitted to either insurance company. Since I refuse to pay half of the full medical bill, she refuses to sign the form to allow me to claim one of my children on taxes. How should this be dealt with? Should she and I split half of the bill after my insurance has paid, or should it be split after both insurances have paid?
My second issue has to do with the house. Minnesota is a joint property state, so she got the house in the divorce even though the mortgage was only in my name. The agreement at that time was that she had a year to refinance or sell, and that she would be forced to sell if she were ever 2 or months behind on payments. She made every payment 30 days late for about the next year, then she fell behind by 2 months. We went to court, and a judge ordered her to sell. She created one listing on Craigslist for 20% above market value. After that, most payments were 2 or more months late. After another year of this, we went to court again, and she was again ordered to sell. She didn't even bother listing the house this time. After about another year, we were in court again, and she was ordered to sell a 3rd time. Barring the Craigslist listing, she has never made any attempt sell or refinance it, and her attorney told mine that if I force her to sell she will move across the state with my kids. 65 of the last 72 payments have been at least 30 days late. My credit is otherwise excellent. What can I do about this? Can I take the house back? Can I sell it? Can I get any kind of damages for her destroying my credit rating?
The final issue involves custody of the children. My children will turn 12 and 13 this year. Both have expressed a desire to live with me. My ex has always been verbally and emotionally abusive. I have reported issues to CPS in the past, but they were never investigated because “reports from ex-husbands have to be taken with a grain of salt”. Last month she hit my daughter, and my daughter told the school. The school reported it to CPS, and my ex admitted to CPS that she has hit the kids on a few occasions. CPS recommended she seek counselling. She did not. Instead she grounded my daughter for telling her teacher. This last weekend my daughter reported to me that her mother hit her with a "plastic thing". I reported this to CPS, but I don't have much faith in a system that figures dads are probably lying. I know I'll have to go to court to seek a change in custody, but what is the process exactly? Do I need to hire an attorney for my kids? Will they have to testify in front of both parents? Will any kind of custody investigation take place? Should I seek a restraining order because of the physical abuse? My ex is very vindictive, so what should I do if (when) she retaliates?
Any help or ideas would be appreciated.
I need advice or ideas for a solution to the issues I am having with my ex. The divorce took place in Minnesota in February of 2010. We have 2 joint children who are minors, and she has 3 children from prior relationships (ages 18, 20, and 32). There are 3 major issues.
The first issue has to do with child support, medical bills, and taxes. The decree states that I am to provide insurance coverage for our joint children, medical expenses are split evenly between me and my ex, and that so long as I am current on child support, I get to claim one of the two children on taxes. I opt to have Minnesota garnish my wages so I am never behind on child support and always have a paper trail to prove it. I have never been late or missed a payment, and I have always provided insurance coverage. The issue is that she also has coverage on the children because she has a family plan to cover her other children so covering our joint children costs her nothing extra. She also takes the children to her insurance's network providers which do not honor my insurance. She then sends the entire pre-insurance bill to me and tells me I have to pay half of the full bill. I have refused because it is my understanding that medical bills are split only after insurance has paid. She refuses to tell me how much insurance has paid or even if it has been remitted to either insurance company. Since I refuse to pay half of the full medical bill, she refuses to sign the form to allow me to claim one of my children on taxes. How should this be dealt with? Should she and I split half of the bill after my insurance has paid, or should it be split after both insurances have paid?
My second issue has to do with the house. Minnesota is a joint property state, so she got the house in the divorce even though the mortgage was only in my name. The agreement at that time was that she had a year to refinance or sell, and that she would be forced to sell if she were ever 2 or months behind on payments. She made every payment 30 days late for about the next year, then she fell behind by 2 months. We went to court, and a judge ordered her to sell. She created one listing on Craigslist for 20% above market value. After that, most payments were 2 or more months late. After another year of this, we went to court again, and she was again ordered to sell. She didn't even bother listing the house this time. After about another year, we were in court again, and she was ordered to sell a 3rd time. Barring the Craigslist listing, she has never made any attempt sell or refinance it, and her attorney told mine that if I force her to sell she will move across the state with my kids. 65 of the last 72 payments have been at least 30 days late. My credit is otherwise excellent. What can I do about this? Can I take the house back? Can I sell it? Can I get any kind of damages for her destroying my credit rating?
The final issue involves custody of the children. My children will turn 12 and 13 this year. Both have expressed a desire to live with me. My ex has always been verbally and emotionally abusive. I have reported issues to CPS in the past, but they were never investigated because “reports from ex-husbands have to be taken with a grain of salt”. Last month she hit my daughter, and my daughter told the school. The school reported it to CPS, and my ex admitted to CPS that she has hit the kids on a few occasions. CPS recommended she seek counselling. She did not. Instead she grounded my daughter for telling her teacher. This last weekend my daughter reported to me that her mother hit her with a "plastic thing". I reported this to CPS, but I don't have much faith in a system that figures dads are probably lying. I know I'll have to go to court to seek a change in custody, but what is the process exactly? Do I need to hire an attorney for my kids? Will they have to testify in front of both parents? Will any kind of custody investigation take place? Should I seek a restraining order because of the physical abuse? My ex is very vindictive, so what should I do if (when) she retaliates?
Any help or ideas would be appreciated.