30 days to file response question?

[gabrielaeon]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

California

-------------------------------------------------------------
june 6: wife served me with divorce papers.


june 11: i met with wife's attorney to agree on how we should split stuff.

we agreed on everything but i thought the spousal support was pretty low: $400.

she makes about $50hr...

as of today: no papers from her attorney regarding settlement have been sent to me.

july 6: my last day to file a response.

--------------------------------------------------------------

this is the kicker....

on her petitition it is check marked:
terminate the court's jurisdiction to award spousal support to respondent.

i've been seeing a legal aid attorney
& their DissoMaster says that i should be getting about $2500!

i sent a fax from legal aid to my wife's attorney
stating that i would be happy with just $1500 month
& that if they don't want to do that,
i am going to setup a hearing with a judge.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

the main question is: thanks for your patience.

should i go file a response on monday
to protect myself from her petition that's checkmarked:
terminate the courts jurisdiction to award spousal support - just in case?

------

thank you soooo much for any help any of you can give!

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by gabrielaeon

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

California

-------------------------------------------------------------
june 6: wife served me with divorce papers.


june 11: i met with wife's attorney to agree on how we should split stuff.

we agreed on everything but i thought the spousal support was pretty low: $400.

she makes about $50hr...

as of today: no papers from her attorney regarding settlement have been sent to me.

july 6: my last day to file a response.

--------------------------------------------------------------

this is the kicker....

on her petitition it is check marked:
terminate the court's jurisdiction to award spousal support to respondent.

i've been seeing a legal aid attorney
& their DissoMaster says that i should be getting about $2500!

i sent a fax from legal aid to my wife's attorney
stating that i would be happy with just $1500 month
& that if they don't want to do that,
i am going to setup a hearing with a judge.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

the main question is: thanks for your patience.

should i go file a response on monday
to protect myself from her petition that's checkmarked:
terminate the courts jurisdiction to award spousal support - just in case?

------

thank you soooo much for any help any of you can give!

Absolutely. If you don't file a response, there's no way you'll get spousal support.

You really need an attorney. In most cases, when one party has an attorney and the other doesn't, the party without an attorney gets ripped off.

[gabrielaeon]

thank you sooooooooooooooo much Mist!

[gabrielaeon]

one other question

i contacted a legal aid center on monday but they aren't open today.

can they file an "extension" for me? how hard is that?

i called an attorney, they want $3500 for that!

-------------------------------------------------------

all in all,
i just want to make sure that i can take her to court
if she doesn't agree in the settlement to at least give $1500 month.

i am not even being greedy. i just want enough to live a minimalist lifestyle.

i want to be able to remove that checkmarked box that says:
"Terminates the courts rights to award spousal support".

-----------------------------------------------------------

thanks again!

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by gabrielaeon

one other question

i contacted a legal aid center on monday but they aren't open today.

can they file an "extension" for me? how hard is that?

i called an attorney, they want $3500 for that!

-------------------------------------------------------

all in all,
i just want to make sure that i can take her to court
if she doesn't agree in the settlement to at least give $1500 month.

i am not even being greedy. i just want enough to live a minimalist lifestyle.

i want to be able to remove that checkmarked box that says:
"Terminates the courts rights to award spousal support".

-----------------------------------------------------------

thanks again!

I don't think you're going to have time to wait for legal aid. File the response yourself objecting to everything. You can always agree to things later.

$3500 is high for a retainer, but that would not be an unusual amount to spend on a divorce.

Don't count on $2500 per month. That's a fairly high support level for someone making $50 per hour, even in CA and even if that's a full time job. It will all depend on a wide variety of factors including her income, your income, how long you were married, and a bunch of other stuff. A big factor is how long you were married. Support isn't going to last forever, so you need to get a job.

[gabrielaeon]

thanks again Mist

15 year relationship, last 6 years = marriage.

i worked & took care of things until 2001 while she got BS & MS degrees.

2001, she said i didn't have to work anymore because we are well off materially.

i've been on a 8 year spiritual sabbatical.

---------------------------------------------------------

i don't want the 2.5k. i have to much heart for that.
i just want between $1k to 1.5k...for a hermit style life....

spousal support is 3 years....

---------------------------------------------------------

the response papers are split into 3 sections:
[1] property declaration
[2] response-marriage
[3] income & expense declaration

which 1 do i fill out to cancel out her check marked
"terminate courts ability to grant spousal support".

---------------------------------------------------------

i am going into legal aid on monday at 11pm.

the court closes at 4pm...

should i get legal aid to help me with an extension or just fill out the response?

---------------------------------------------------------

thank u so much for your help. i really really appreciate it.

[Dogmatique]

Originally Posted by gabrielaeon

thanks again Mist

15 year relationship, last 6 years = marriage.

i worked & took care of things until 2001 while she got BS & MS degrees.

2001, she said i didn't have to work anymore because we are well off materially.

i've been on a 8 year spiritual sabbatical.

---------------------------------------------------------

i don't want the 2.5k. i have to much heart for that.
i just want between $1k to 1.5k...for a hermit style life....

spousal support is 3 years....

---------------------------------------------------------

the response papers are split into 3 sections:
[1] property declaration
[2] response-marriage
[3] income & expense declaration

which 1 do i fill out to cancel out her check marked
"terminate courts ability to grant spousal support".

---------------------------------------------------------

i am going into legal aid on monday at 11pm.

the court closes at 4pm...

should i get legal aid to help me with an extension or just fill out the response?

---------------------------------------------------------

thank u so much for your help. i really really appreciate it.

Were you only married for 6 years?

[CourtClerk]

There is no such thing as filing an extension. You file the response or I guarantee, they'll file a default on Tuesday.

You should find a self help center in the courthouse. Get there EARLY (like 7:30 - 8am) and wait for them to help you.

Oh, and it's time to get off of your sabbatical and get back to work or you may end up with ZERO spousal support as your wife won't be made to support you if you have no intentions of working.

[Dogmatique]

OP - perhaps I'm misinterpreting something but I still want to ask...

Are you working to support yourself?

If not..why is that?

[gabrielaeon]

can i fill out the response myself?

does it really matter if i get some things wrong?

i just want to make sure that i cancel out the check marked box:
"terminate courts jurisdiction to award spousal support".

thank you.

[Dogmatique]

Originally Posted by gabrielaeon

one other question

i contacted a legal aid center on monday but they aren't open today.

can they file an "extension" for me? how hard is that?

i called an attorney, they want $3500 for that!

-------------------------------------------------------

all in all,
i just want to make sure that i can take her to court
if she doesn't agree in the settlement to at least give $1500 month.

i am not even being greedy. i just want enough to live a minimalist lifestyle.

i want to be able to remove that checkmarked box that says:
"Terminates the courts rights to award spousal support".

-----------------------------------------------------------

thanks again!

I realize that this isn't a debate forum, but there's just something I'm really curious about.

(and I'm not being facetious when I say that)

You are not disabled, and have the capacity to work. The marriage was short term. I honestly cannot fathom why you believe your ex-wife should be supporting you. Again, this isn't meant to be argumentative in the slightest - I'm just genuinely, truly curious.

(there's every chance you'll be asked that in court, too)

Am I missing something?

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by Dogmatique

I realize that this isn't a debate forum, but there's just something I'm really curious about.

(and I'm not being facetious when I say that)

You are not disabled, and have the capacity to work. The marriage was short term. I honestly cannot fathom why you believe your ex-wife should be supporting you. Again, this isn't meant to be argumentative in the slightest - I'm just genuinely, truly curious.

(there's every chance you'll be asked that in court, too)

Am I missing something?

Every state is a bit different when it comes to alimony/spousal support. In quite a few states a short term marriage can result in short term alimony/spousal support....in others it won't.

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by Dogmatique

I realize that this isn't a debate forum, but there's just something I'm really curious about.

(and I'm not being facetious when I say that)

You are not disabled, and have the capacity to work. The marriage was short term. I honestly cannot fathom why you believe your ex-wife should be supporting you. Again, this isn't meant to be argumentative in the slightest - I'm just genuinely, truly curious.

(there's every chance you'll be asked that in court, too)

Am I missing something?

Whether or not his wife SHOULD support him isn't really relevant. What's relevant is whether the law says she must support him.

In CA, alimony can be awarded for even short term marriages (something like 1/2 the length of the marriage, IIRC). That doesn't mean it WILL, but it can be. OP needs to read up on the rules, but regardless of whether he gets alimony or not, he needs to be able to support himself. It's time to get out into the workforce and get a job.

Oh, and Bali? Note that in this case it's a man who might be receiving alimony.

[CourtClerk]

Originally Posted by gabrielaeon

can i fill out the response myself?

Yes

does it really matter if i get some things wrong?

Yes, it really matters

i just want to make sure that i cancel out the check marked box:
"terminate courts jurisdiction to award spousal support".

thank you.

You may want to respond to the petition in its entirety instead of concentrating on making sure that your soon to be ex spouse supports you.

[Dogmatique]

Originally Posted by mistoffolees

Whether or not his wife SHOULD support him isn't really relevant. What's relevant is whether the law says she must support him.

In CA, alimony can be awarded for even short term marriages (something like 1/2 the length of the marriage, IIRC). That doesn't mean it WILL, but it can be. OP needs to read up on the rules, but regardless of whether he gets alimony or not, he needs to be able to support himself. It's time to get out into the workforce and get a job.

Oh, and Bali? Note that in this case it's a man who might be receiving alimony.

Sigh..yes, you're right. I suppose I'm just wary of an able-bodied person being awarded spousal support just because they can, as opposed to them actually having a legitimate need, you know?

But that's going too far into personal opinion which is, I know, completely irrelevant. Sorry for the minor derailment.