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Accustomed Standard of Living

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What is the name of your state? Florida

My fiance will be representing himself in court shortly as his ex of 2 years wants more alimony. They were married 12 years and no children.

Background:

Fiance had a professional interim position for 2 years and was going to get the permanent position when his ex wife sabotaged it by sending slander to the president of the company when he wanted a divorce. He was asked to withdraw his application and now has a lesser paying position.

Owned a $140K house with ex and decided to build a $500K house due to the new position he thought he would be getting. They lived in an apt for 18 mos while waiting for the house to be built. He left his wife right after the closing for fear of losing money. (I know bad move). He lived in the new house two weeks and moved out and she filed for divorce 3 months later. He paid all the payments during that time. At the divorce she INSISTED on buying him out and not selling and splitting like my fiance wanted. She is very material oriented. She sells perfume at a dept store (used to be high in commissons but of course not now). We think her daughter moved out and she cannot pay all her expenses that go with a $500K house.

QUESTION????
Is her standard of living she is accustomed to connected to the house they shared for 12 years ($140K) , the apt they rented for 18 months or the house she decided to buy after the divorce? She remortgaged it in her name only and he signed a quit claim and recieved $40,000 payout. If he had remained married to her and did not get the permenant position, he would have had to sell on his present salary.

The slander was she charged him with battery and he was found NOT guilty as she fabricated it. She is one angry b*&^h.

We just have to know what tactics he can use when he has to go to court. He responded that he would like to lower the alimony as his salary is lower each year to bring him down to the present position salary. Should he be responsible for expenses she created on her own?

My issue is I do not trust the FL judges.
 


moburkes

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? Florida

My fiance will be representing himself in court shortly as his ex of 2 years wants more alimony. They were married 12 years and no children.

Background:

Fiance had a professional interim position for 2 years and was going to get the permanent position when his ex wife sabotaged it by sending slander to the president of the company when he wanted a divorce. He was asked to withdraw his application and now has a lesser paying position.

Owned a $140K house with ex and decided to build a $500K house due to the new position he thought he would be getting. They lived in an apt for 18 mos while waiting for the house to be built. He left his wife right after the closing for fear of losing money. (I know bad move). He lived in the new house two weeks and moved out and she filed for divorce 3 months later. He paid all the payments during that time. At the divorce she INSISTED on buying him out and not selling and splitting like my fiance wanted. She is very material oriented. She sells perfume at a dept store (used to be high in commissons but of course not now). We think her daughter moved out and she cannot pay all her expenses that go with a $500K house.

QUESTION????
Is her standard of living she is accustomed to connected to the house they shared for 12 years ($140K) , the apt they rented for 18 months or the house she decided to buy after the divorce? She remortgaged it in her name only and he signed a quit claim and recieved $40,000 payout. If he had remained married to her and did not get the permenant position, he would have had to sell on his present salary.

The slander was she charged him with battery and he was found NOT guilty as she fabricated it. She is one angry b*&^h.

We just have to know what tactics he can use when he has to go to court. He responded that he would like to lower the alimony as his salary is lower each year to bring him down to the present position salary. Should he be responsible for expenses she created on her own?

My issue is I do not trust the FL judges.
Why does it matter that she wanted to move into the house vs. sell it? In either case, your fiance won't be living there. Just because he was found not guilty doesn't mean that he wasn't guilty. No slander there.

Are they already divorced?
 

Bali Hai

Senior Member
Why does it matter that she wanted to move into the house vs. sell it? In either case, your fiance won't be living there. Just because he was found not guilty doesn't mean that he wasn't guilty. No slander there.

Are they already divorced?
Yes.

Ex-hubby is fortunate that YOU weren't on the jury!
 
Last edited:

Bali Hai

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? Florida

My fiance will be representing himself in court shortly as his ex of 2 years wants more alimony. They were married 12 years and no children.

How the hell did she get alimony in the first place??

Background:

Fiance had a professional interim position for 2 years and was going to get the permanent position when his ex wife sabotaged it by sending slander to the president of the company when he wanted a divorce. He was asked to withdraw his application and now has a lesser paying position.

Owned a $140K house with ex and decided to build a $500K house due to the new position he thought he would be getting. They lived in an apt for 18 mos while waiting for the house to be built. He left his wife right after the closing for fear of losing money. (I know bad move). He lived in the new house two weeks and moved out and she filed for divorce 3 months later. He paid all the payments during that time. At the divorce she INSISTED on buying him out and not selling and splitting like my fiance wanted. She is very material oriented. She sells perfume at a dept store (used to be high in commissons but of course not now). We think her daughter moved out and she cannot pay all her expenses that go with a $500K house.

She's living beyond her means and wants him to foot the bill?? That's a typical ex-wife.

QUESTION????
Is her standard of living she is accustomed to connected to the house they shared for 12 years ($140K) , the apt they rented for 18 months or the house she decided to buy after the divorce?

I would guess that the standard of living she is accustomed to is far better than she deserves.

She remortgaged it in her name only and he signed a quit claim and recieved $40,000 payout. If he had remained married to her and did not get the permenant position, he would have had to sell on his present salary.

The slander was she charged him with battery and he was found NOT guilty as she fabricated it. She is one angry b*&^h.

We just have to know what tactics he can use when he has to go to court. He responded that he would like to lower the alimony as his salary is lower each year to bring him down to the present position salary. Should he be responsible for expenses she created on her own?

Any rational person would say she needs to be responsible for her own actions, but your dealing with a court and a female, and anything can happen.


My issue is I do not trust the FL judges
.
I don't trust ANY judges, but your fiance is at their mercy.
 

tpa05

Junior Member
Sounds like a good story brewin' here. I'm here all night fillin' out divorce papers. Please give us all something "interesting" to read no?
 

Gracie3787

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? Florida

My fiance will be representing himself in court shortly as his ex of 2 years wants more alimony. They were married 12 years and no children.

Background:

Fiance had a professional interim position for 2 years and was going to get the permanent position when his ex wife sabotaged it by sending slander to the president of the company when he wanted a divorce. He was asked to withdraw his application and now has a lesser paying position.

Owned a $140K house with ex and decided to build a $500K house due to the new position he thought he would be getting. They lived in an apt for 18 mos while waiting for the house to be built. He left his wife right after the closing for fear of losing money. (I know bad move). He lived in the new house two weeks and moved out and she filed for divorce 3 months later. He paid all the payments during that time. At the divorce she INSISTED on buying him out and not selling and splitting like my fiance wanted. She is very material oriented. She sells perfume at a dept store (used to be high in commissons but of course not now). We think her daughter moved out and she cannot pay all her expenses that go with a $500K house.

QUESTION????
Is her standard of living she is accustomed to connected to the house they shared for 12 years ($140K) , the apt they rented for 18 months or the house she decided to buy after the divorce? She remortgaged it in her name only and he signed a quit claim and recieved $40,000 payout. If he had remained married to her and did not get the permenant position, he would have had to sell on his present salary.

The slander was she charged him with battery and he was found NOT guilty as she fabricated it. She is one angry b*&^h.

We just have to know what tactics he can use when he has to go to court. He responded that he would like to lower the alimony as his salary is lower each year to bring him down to the present position salary. Should he be responsible for expenses she created on her own?

My issue is I do not trust the FL judges.
I remember your other recent thead. Your hubby's ex has gotten herself into financial trouble by living beyond her means. As was advised on the other thread, it's highly unlikely that she'll recieve an increase for that reason. The court issued an alimony award at the time of divorce and the court will not increase that award simply because the former spouse wnats more.

Now, your hubby wanting a decrease is another thing altogether. Can he prove, with documentation, that his decrease in income is completely involuntary? Was he laid off, injured, employer went under, etc? If so, he might be able to get a decrease. However, he should NOT attempt to say that his ex caused him to lose his job, unless he has extremely good evidence (such as his former employer's COURT TESTIMONY explaining that he was laid off specifically due to his ex's actions).
 
Standard of Lving

Only one person sort of answered my question...everyone else used my thread as a "how are you? and yes....he is divorced.

....I was not on the jury.....I was called as a witness. I happen to work at an agency where abused women are helped. I know an abused woman when I see one. I was abused for 30 years.

Thank you for the advice about not changing the alimony and not mentioning about her causing him to lose his job. You are right this is not about that. He did not land the high admin job and was offered a job as a professor instead which of course is a lower salary that he had no say in which is to decrease in increments for the next 4 years. . He does have a letter from his new dean stating this. And yes it was slander as nothing was proven at that point. Due to this though she bit herself as she got a lower alimony based on the professor salary. Are you not innocent until proven guilty?

What standard of living though is the ex going to say she is accustomed to? Please refer to the original question.

Big house she bought after the divorce which she prior had lived in for 3 months while the divorce was settled. She refused to move out.
apt for 18 mos
house they lived in for 12 years?

I do appreciate your forum and thank those who give us "poor folks" excellent advice.
 

Gracie3787

Senior Member
What standard of living though is the ex going to say she is accustomed to? Please refer to the original question.
It doesn't matter what standard of living she's been accustomed to since the divorce. The only time that the "standard of living" is used is during the divorce and the initial order of alimony. The alimony was based on the standard of living that existed before the divorce. Any modifications to the original order cannot be based on a higher standard than what existed at the time of the divorce.
 

climerz1

Junior Member
And if he can prove that she filed false charges he can sue her for that and recover all costs asocciated with that.IE(lawyer fees, court costs,and damages caused loss of income.
 

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