Alienation of Affection

[emtk8t]

louisiana
my question is pertaining to "allienation of affection" i am a female i live and work in louisiana, i work shift work with a male partner from mississippi who is recently going through seperation and divorce. Because of our shift work and line of work we have become close as friends only we do not have any other relationship with each other besides the friendship. We do text message frequently and call each other on our days off just to check on each other, but never interrupting each others "family time" meaning we wouldn't call or text each other when we were spending time with our seperate families. We have been working together for approx 1 yr. I had become friends with his wife also, i attended her birthday party bought her a gift, i asked her to go to dinner with me so we could get to know each other better, but she could never go and she has even given me hammy down clothes for my son from hers. During his recent seperation his spouse stated she would seek legal action against myself due to affection loss. She also said that in miss you dont have to prove the actual act of infidelity not that there has been. I live in louisiana and understand my state has abolished the alienation of affection law. My question is can someone from mississippi sue someone from louisiana for allienation of affection????What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Louisiana

[Silverplum]

Originally Posted by emtk8t

louisiana
my question is pertaining to "allienation of affection" i am a female i live and work in louisiana, i work shift work with a male partner from mississippi who is recently going through seperation and divorce. Because of our shift work and line of work we have become close as friends only we do not have any other relationship with each other besides the friendship. We do text message frequently and call each other on our days off just to check on each other, but never interrupting each others "family time" meaning we wouldn't call or text each other when we were spending time with our seperate families. We have been working together for approx 1 yr. I had become friends with his wife also, i attended her birthday party bought her a gift, i asked her to go to dinner with me so we could get to know each other better, but she could never go and she has even given me hammy down clothes for my son from hers. During his recent seperation his spouse stated she would seek legal action against myself due to affection loss. She also said that in miss you dont have to prove the actual act of infidelity not that there has been. I live in louisiana and understand my state has abolished the alienation of affection law. My question is can someone from mississippi sue someone from louisiana for allienation of affection????What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Louisiana

Yes. Mississippi has that type of law on their books.

[seniorjudge]

In Louisiana in 1927, in the case of Moulin v. Monteleone, 165 La. 169, 115 So. 447, actions for alienation of affection were abolished.

Mississippi still has these laws.

Whether such a thing can be proved is something I don't know since I don't know the facts in this case.

[swrdmbo]

OT but I can't help it. I really do not mean this in an insulting way so please do not take it that way. I spent some serious time in my youth trying to figure out some of my Mother's sayings..which were in fact...misunderstandings of the English she heard(she's German) and I know I spent way too much time trying to figure out what "beggars can't be juicer's" meant.

My Mom didn't get what was said correctly but she got the gist and that was good enough for her. I was amazed and somewhat embarrassed when I realized the saying was "Beggars can't be choosers".

So I just want to let you know that the phrase is "hand me down" clothes. And if you are going to be using the word a lot in the near future,separate is spelled with an a.My dad told me early on that separate had "a rat " in it and spelling it after that was never a problem.

Good luck.

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by Silverplum

Yes. Mississippi has that type of law on their books.

Two issues:

1. Would Mississippi have any personal jurisdiction over her since she lives in Louisiana and apparently doesn't come to MS? Can they do anything to her?

2. In any event, It's hard to imagine that having a non-physical friendship with someone would be grounds for an alienation of affection suit, anyway - even in Mississippi. There is no law against having friends of the opposite sex.

[Ohiogal]

Originally Posted by mistoffolees

Two issues:

1. Would Mississippi have any personal jurisdiction over her since she lives in Louisiana and apparently doesn't come to MS? Can they do anything to her?

2. In any event, It's hard to imagine that having a non-physical friendship with someone would be grounds for an alienation of affection suit, anyway - even in Mississippi. There is no law against having friends of the opposite sex.

Yes they would -- why? Text messages to someone in Mississippi. She willingly sent them. Hence... her behavior can be governed by Louisiana as well. She voluntarily interacted with a Mississippi resident.

[emtk8t]

louisiana does not recognize the alienation of affection law any longer they abolished it in like the 1920's there are only a few states that have this law in place still.
mississippi does
so if la doesnt and ms does how does it work when the person being accused is from la where it is not recognized??????

[seniorjudge]

Originally Posted by emtk8t

louisiana does not recognize the alienation of affection law any longer they abolished it in like the 1920's there are only a few states that have this law in place still.
mississippi does
so if la doesnt and ms does how does it work when the person being accused is from la where it is not recognized??????

The Mississippi court could say you submitted yourself to its jurisdiction when you sent text messages to Mississippi.

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by Ohiogal

Yes they would -- why? Text messages to someone in Mississippi. She willingly sent them. Hence... her behavior can be governed by Louisiana as well. She voluntarily interacted with a Mississippi resident.

OK. That's why I asked the question.

Still, if there's nothing physical in their relationship and it is completely platonic, I'm having a hard time figuring how even MS would find her guilty of alienation of affection. People are allowed to have friends of either gender.

[emtk8t]

i had never even heard of this law until recently...is this a law that is frequently brought up in the ms courts??? what must be proven to have an alienation of affection justifacation?

[penelope10]

IMO an affair does not have to be a physical affair. It can very much be an emotional one. Time spent on the internet, texting, etc. takes time away that one might spend with their spouse. Plus any advice given might play into causing problems with the other party's marriage.

I, for one, don't have close relationships with men that are married. I have friends that are couples, but I would never privately text one of my friend's husbands. (Giving advice on their marriage, child rearing, etc.) And I would also never do this with any other married man either.

[emtk8t]

Originally Posted by penelope10

IMO an affair does not have to be a physical affair. It can very much be an emotional one. Time spent on the internet, texting, etc. takes time away that one might spend with their spouse. Plus any advice given might play into causing problems with the other party's marriage.

I, for one, don't have close relationships with men that are married. I have friends that are couples, but I would never privately text one of my friend's husbands. (Giving advice on their marriage, child rearing, etc.) And I would also never do this with any other married man either.

i dont believe that you read my original post if you had you would realize that i was friends with both of them not just him. I am closer to he more then she because he and I work shift work we are partners in la on a 24hr shift on an ambulance. She also works shift work on an ambulance for a company in ms and has a male partner for 12 hr shifts at night. Honesty, integrity, brotherhood, and most importantly TRUST, in the our line of work are '' a must have''. Also stated in my original post we never talked, texted, or called each other when we was spending time with our individual families. The texting/talking on our days off from our full time job only occurred when he was at work at his part time job, (which he worked almost everyday he was off from his fulltime job). The conversations with each other vary, some pertain to calls we have run, we both like deer hunting so some pertain to hunting, others may include deciding what we doing for breakfast lunch and dinner on our 24 hr shift.

[penelope10]

Originally Posted by emtk8t

i dont believe that you read my original post if you had you would realize that i was friends with both of them not just him. I am closer to he more then she because he and I work shift work we are partners in la on a 24hr shift on an ambulance. She also works shift work on an ambulance for a company in ms and has a male partner for 12 hr shifts at night. Honesty, integrity, brotherhood, and most importantly TRUST, in the our line of work are '' a must have''. Also stated in my original post we never talked, texted, or called each other when we was spending time with our individual families. The texting/talking on our days off from our full time job only occurred when he was at work at his part time job, (which he worked almost everyday he was off from his fulltime job).

You did not read my full text. I have friends that are married. I would not text, etc. one of their husbands even if I worked with them. If I needed to talk specifically about work, I'd call the home phone number. Frankly, I don't understand the need to contact one another on days off, and in particular when he was at his part time job.

You and he spent 24 hour shifts together at work.Then the two of you communicated when he was at work pt (which you stated was almost everyday he was off from his full time job.) So it sounds like you two were pretty much in constant communication every day. I don't talk to my GIRLFRIENDS as often as you were in touch with this man.

And generally people that have some emotional involvement beyond friendship often do not text during the other "friend's" family time.

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by penelope10

IMO an affair does not have to be a physical affair. It can very much be an emotional one. Time spent on the internet, texting, etc. takes time away that one might spend with their spouse. Plus any advice given might play into causing problems with the other party's marriage.

I, for one, don't have close relationships with men that are married. I have friends that are couples, but I would never privately text one of my friend's husbands. (Giving advice on their marriage, child rearing, etc.) And I would also never do this with any other married man either.

It would be interesting to see how you reached those conclusions.

There's nothing in the OP which indicates that they talked about marriage, child rearing, etc. The OP also states that she has met the wife and has tried to keep her involved ('hammy down' clothes, etc).

While it's entirely possible that OP is involved in an emotional relationship with the husband, there's absolutely nothing there that suggests it.

Whether it's right for her to be friends with a married man (even if she had made no attempt to include the wife which she clearly did in this case), it's not illegal.

[mistoffolees]

Originally Posted by penelope10

You did not read my full text. I have friends that are married. I would not text, etc. one of their husbands even if I worked with them. If I needed to talk specifically about work, I'd call the home phone number. Frankly, I don't understand the need to contact one another on days off, and in particular when he was at his part time job.

You and he spent 24 hour shifts together at work.Then the two of you communicated when he was at work pt (which you stated was almost everyday he was off from his full time job.) So it sounds like you two were pretty much in constant communication every day. I don't talk to my GIRLFRIENDS as often as you were in touch with this man.

And generally people that have some emotional involvement beyond friendship often do not text during the other "friend's" family time.

She specifically stated that she doesn't text during his time with his family. Did you even read what she said before you condemned her?

And whether you think it's OK for a married man to have female friends or not, can you point out what's illegal about it? Or maybe you point out the universal community standards that says a married man has to avoid any contact with any female in the universe other than his wife?