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Am I still legally married?

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KJWhitt

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Texas

Once upon a time (over 20 years ago) I was married to a man who ran off with his 13 year old pregnant girlfriend. " Pedophile" wasn't a household word at the time. I went to court to get a divorce but my attorney was in the hospital that day and another attorney (right out of law school) went to court with me. That was it, I never heard anything else about the divorce. I just assumed it was a done deal. (I know, NEVER assume anything) My attorney passed away shortly after I went to court and here it is twenty plus years later and there is NO record of the divorce.

I have never remarried by my ex married his young friend in the same county (that's on record) and divorced her and he got full custody of their two children (that' all on record). Then he married another woman. Same county, filed for all to see.

I have searched and hunted through years worth of zipped files looking for some record of our divorce to no avail. It's my guess it was never filed and slipped through the cracks never to be seen again. Am I still legally married to that man?

If the answer is "yes", you'll love the rest of the story.

Thanks in advance for any reply!:D
 


Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
You need to consult with a family law/divorce attorney ASAP - your case probably has enough twists and turns that you will need more than an internet forum can offer...
 

Mommy711

Member
What is the name of your state? Texas

Once upon a time (over 20 years ago) I was married to a man who ran off with his 13 year old pregnant girlfriend. " Pedophile" wasn't a household word at the time. I went to court to get a divorce but my attorney was in the hospital that day and another attorney (right out of law school) went to court with me. That was it, I never heard anything else about the divorce. I just assumed it was a done deal. (I know, NEVER assume anything) My attorney passed away shortly after I went to court and here it is twenty plus years later and there is NO record of the divorce.

I have never remarried by my ex married his young friend in the same county (that's on record) and divorced her and he got full custody of their two children (that' all on record). Then he married another woman. Same county, filed for all to see.

I have searched and hunted through years worth of zipped files looking for some record of our divorce to no avail. It's my guess it was never filed and slipped through the cracks never to be seen again. Am I still legally married to that man?

If the answer is "yes", you'll love the rest of the story.

Thanks in advance for any reply!:D

Do you have any paperwork from the "divorce"? Do you have a case number? If you do and it leads to nothing than you are still married.

Didn't you and your husband have any issues to work out that would have required a property settlement or something of that nature dividing your assests?

Did you sign a copy of your divorce decree, or do you remember?

Yes, you are most likely still married.
 

KJWhitt

Junior Member
It seems like I may have had an unsigned copy of the divorce decree at one time but not one that was filed at the county. That young attorney may have given me that the day we went to court but it was lost or thrown out probably sometime before the Macarena came along. (then thankfully went away) As for dividing the assets we had at that time, I wiped out the savings account, loaded up my dogs, my clothes and my sailboat, drove away and never looked back. Needless to say I was pissed. That was in 1986 and I've only spoken to my ex on the phone one time since then. I called him years ago to ask him of he had a copy of our divorce decree and I was met with about 30 seconds of dead silence before he stammered around and told me he did. I asked him if he could send me a copy of it and he said he would. I never received anything at all from him.

Here's the part I think is interesting. While we were married we lived on and my husband managed a dude ranch type facility (owned by my ex father-in-law) that catered to company parties, company picnics, dinner dances etc. No over night facilities but plenty of fun things to do to entertain groups of up to several thousand people. A nine acre lake with paddleboats and canoes, softball, volley ball, swimming pools, horses to ride, barbeque cooked by our full kitchen staff, country music and dancing all located just miles notth of DFW Ariport. They built a Hilton Hotel next door on property that my father-in-law sold to Hilton by the square foot over thirty years ago.

Meanwhile......after I was long gone, husband and the girl to which he thinks he's legally married move back to the ranch and he continues managing the parties and picnics. A couple of years later father-in-law dies and leaves this place to my ex and his two siblings. The square dancing and parties continue for years to come and at some point my ex sells off a large portion of the property where a huge mall is eventualy built. Then a few years ago he and his siblings sell off the whole place. He also owned some other real property around the DFW metroplex. See how interesting this could get? I suppose I need to sue him for divorce but I want to be sure I get what's legally mine.

Well, OF COURSE this is all about money! I'd like to know what you guys think. Thanks again in advance for your input.:D

Kj
 

KJWhitt

Junior Member
It seems like I may have had an unsigned copy of the divorce decree at one time but not one that was filed at the county. That young attorney may have given me that the day we went to court but it was lost or thrown out probably sometime before the Macarena came along. (then thankfully went away) As for dividing the assets we had at that time, I wiped out the savings account, loaded up my dogs, my clothes and my sailboat, drove away and never looked back. Needless to say I was pissed. That was in 1986 and I've only spoken to my ex on the phone one time since then. I called him years ago to ask him of he had a copy of our divorce decree and I was met with about 30 seconds of dead silence before he stammered around and told me he did. I asked him if he could send me a copy of it and he said he would. I never received anything at all from him.

Here's the part I think is interesting. While we were married we lived on and my husband managed a dude ranch type facility (owned by my ex father-in-law) that catered to company parties, company picnics, dinner dances etc. No over night facilities but plenty of fun things to do to entertain groups of up to several thousand people. A nine acre lake with paddleboats and canoes, softball, volley ball, swimming pools, horses to ride, barbeque cooked by our full kitchen staff, country music and dancing all located just miles notth of DFW Ariport. They built a Hilton Hotel next door on property that my father-in-law sold to Hilton by the square foot over thirty years ago.

Meanwhile......after I was long gone, husband and the girl to which he thinks he's legally married move back to the ranch and he continues managing the parties and picnics. A couple of years later father-in-law dies and leaves this place to my ex and his two siblings. The square dancing and parties continue for years to come and at some point my ex sells off a large portion of the property where a huge mall is eventualy built. Then a few years ago he and his siblings sell off the whole place. He also owned some other real property around the DFW metroplex. See how interesting this could get? I suppose I need to sue him for divorce but I want to be sure I get what's legally mine.

Well, OF COURSE this is all about money! I'd like to know what you guys think. Thanks again in advance for your input.:D
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
It seems like I may have had an unsigned copy of the divorce decree at one time but not one that was filed at the county. That young attorney may have given me that the day we went to court but it was lost or thrown out probably sometime before the Macarena came along. (then thankfully went away) As for dividing the assets we had at that time, I wiped out the savings account, loaded up my dogs, my clothes and my sailboat, drove away and never looked back. Needless to say I was pissed. That was in 1986 and I've only spoken to my ex on the phone one time since then. I called him years ago to ask him of he had a copy of our divorce decree and I was met with about 30 seconds of dead silence before he stammered around and told me he did. I asked him if he could send me a copy of it and he said he would. I never received anything at all from him.

Here's the part I think is interesting. While we were married we lived on and my husband managed a dude ranch type facility (owned by my ex father-in-law) that catered to company parties, company picnics, dinner dances etc. No over night facilities but plenty of fun things to do to entertain groups of up to several thousand people. A nine acre lake with paddleboats and canoes, softball, volley ball, swimming pools, horses to ride, barbeque cooked by our full kitchen staff, country music and dancing all located just miles notth of DFW Ariport. They built a Hilton Hotel next door on property that my father-in-law sold to Hilton by the square foot over thirty years ago.

Meanwhile......after I was long gone, husband and the girl to which he thinks he's legally married move back to the ranch and he continues managing the parties and picnics. A couple of years later father-in-law dies and leaves this place to my ex and his two siblings. The square dancing and parties continue for years to come and at some point my ex sells off a large portion of the property where a huge mall is eventualy built. Then a few years ago he and his siblings sell off the whole place. He also owned some other real property around the DFW metroplex. See how interesting this could get? I suppose I need to sue him for divorce but I want to be sure I get what's legally mine.

Well, OF COURSE this is all about money! I'd like to know what you guys think. Thanks again in advance for your input.:D
Inheritances are generally separate property and not subject to division in a divorce. There can be exceptions, but they can be costly to promote/defend.

My advice? Do what you need to do to make sure that you are legally divorced, but leave his property alone.

You believed that you were divorced...how would you feel if the roles were reversed?
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
It seems like I may have had an unsigned copy of the divorce decree at one time but not one that was filed at the county. That young attorney may have given me that the day we went to court but it was lost or thrown out probably sometime before the Macarena came along. (then thankfully went away) As for dividing the assets we had at that time, I wiped out the savings account, loaded up my dogs, my clothes and my sailboat, drove away and never looked back. Needless to say I was pissed. That was in 1986 and I've only spoken to my ex on the phone one time since then. I called him years ago to ask him of he had a copy of our divorce decree and I was met with about 30 seconds of dead silence before he stammered around and told me he did. I asked him if he could send me a copy of it and he said he would. I never received anything at all from him.

Here's the part I think is interesting. While we were married we lived on and my husband managed a dude ranch type facility (owned by my ex father-in-law) that catered to company parties, company picnics, dinner dances etc. No over night facilities but plenty of fun things to do to entertain groups of up to several thousand people. A nine acre lake with paddleboats and canoes, softball, volley ball, swimming pools, horses to ride, barbeque cooked by our full kitchen staff, country music and dancing all located just miles notth of DFW Ariport. They built a Hilton Hotel next door on property that my father-in-law sold to Hilton by the square foot over thirty years ago.

Meanwhile......after I was long gone, husband and the girl to which he thinks he's legally married move back to the ranch and he continues managing the parties and picnics. A couple of years later father-in-law dies and leaves this place to my ex and his two siblings. The square dancing and parties continue for years to come and at some point my ex sells off a large portion of the property where a huge mall is eventualy built. Then a few years ago he and his siblings sell off the whole place. He also owned some other real property around the DFW metroplex. See how interesting this could get? I suppose I need to sue him for divorce but I want to be sure I get what's legally mine.

Well, OF COURSE this is all about money! I'd like to know what you guys think. Thanks again in advance for your input.:D

Kj
The advice you got makes the most sense. See an attorney - a good one.
 

VeronicaLodge

Senior Member
i find it odd how you are able to track and find all this out about his and his family's real estate transactions over the years but can't find out if you are legally divorced?!?!? :confused:
 

KJWhitt

Junior Member
If the roles were reversed? I wouldn't have (as an adult man) been screwing a 13 year old girl. There's right and there's wrong and (in my opinion) there's not a whole lot of gray area here.

I will, as advised, try to seek good legal counsel in this matter.

Thanks for all your help, you guys are great. :D

Kj
 

KJWhitt

Junior Member
If the roles were reversed? I wouldn't have (as an adult man) been screwing a 13 year old girl. There's right and there's wrong and (in my opinion) there's not a whole lot of gray area here.

I will, as advised, try to seek good legal counsel in this matter.

Thanks for all your help, you guys are great. :D

Kj
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
If the roles were reversed? I wouldn't have (as an adult man) been screwing a 13 year old girl. There's right and there's wrong and (in my opinion) there's not a whole lot of gray area here.
So because he did something wrong, you think you're entitled to steal his inheritance from him?

Maybe you should think about 'right and wrong', too.
 

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