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Asking for 4 years worth after saying nothing

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emsxray

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

Our divorce decree states that I am required to pay half of the medical bills not covered by the insurance. My ex-wife is now demanding that I pay half of all the expenses that she failed to request before she will follow the Child Support order and pick up our daughter after her visitation.

The two part question is
1) Can she ask for the money now after 4 years or is there some form of limitation as to how far back she can request?

2) Regardless of the outcome, is she allowed to refuse to obey the support order and what should I do if she does refuse to pick our daughter up at the end of my visitation?
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
If she refuses to pick up the child per the court order, you keep the child. Make sure she gets to HER (the child's) school on time and so on and so forth.

If she doesn't pay child support then you file a motion to show cause against mom. Most times she has to present copies of the bills within 30 to 60 days of receipt. Dig out your court order. Quote the portions for transportation of the child and medical reimbursement.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
If she refuses to pick up the child per the court order, you keep the child. Make sure she gets to HER (the child's) school on time and so on and so forth.

If she doesn't pay child support then you file a motion to show cause against mom. Most times she has to present copies of the bills within 30 to 60 days of receipt. Dig out your court order. Quote the portions for transportation of the child and medical reimbursement.
Are you sure that you read his post correctly? His wording was poor, but apparently mom has custody and he has visitation.
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

Our divorce decree states that I am required to pay half of the medical bills not covered by the insurance. My ex-wife is now demanding that I pay half of all the expenses that she failed to request before she will follow the Child Support order and pick up our daughter after her visitation.

The two part question is
1) Can she ask for the money now after 4 years or is there some form of limitation as to how far back she can request?

2) Regardless of the outcome, is she allowed to refuse to obey the support order and what should I do if she does refuse to pick our daughter up at the end of my visitation?
The two issues are unrelated.

1. She can demand anything she wishes. You can look at it two ways. The first is that you were responsible for half the medical bills (presumably for your child's benefit), so why does it matter that she didn't submit them to you promptly? You got to use the money for 4 years, but it's a legitimate obligation. However, if you're going to ignore the court order and not pay her over a technicality, she would have to go back to court to get the court to order you to pay. I'm not sure that there's a legal limit, so the judge could probably order you to pay - as well as possibly paying her legal expenses.

2. Visitation/custody issues are completely unrelated to financial issues. You are obligated to do YOUR part to follow the court order. If she chooses not to follow the court order, you ignore it (if her actions are to your benefit) or go back to court to have the order enforced (if her actions are not to your benefit).
 

emsxray

Junior Member
Thank you for all the responses. Very helpful.:)

I will admit I was in a hurry and didn't clarify some things.

I am the non-residential parent. I pay child support. I have visitations every other weekend and 4-5 weeks every summer. She is bringing all this up because I asked her to start picking our daughter up on Sundays after my visitation. That is what the child support order states. She has been very rigid over the last 4 years about what she will or, more often than not, won't do. There are actually about several different things that she is now arguing/fighting with me over.

1. I do not dispute the fact that I am required (and have been) to pay half of any medical bills not covered by the insurance. My issue is she never requested or informed me of any costs and only brings them up now. So instead of paying small amounts, if a judge rules that I have to pay 4 years worth now, I could go under financially ... again. This is where I have an issue because it hardly seems fair. I feel I should not be held accountable for costs from 2, 3, or 4 years ago that I didn't know even existed because of her non-communication, but I don't know what the law says.

2. She has indicated that she will not pick up our child until I pay all past medical expenses. I believe I can then keep our daughter until she comes to get her or overnight, as indicated by Ohiogal, and just take her to school the next day.

(The other)
3. She claims that as the non-residential parent, I have no say in what extracurricular activities our daughter participates in, but am still required to pay for half of all those expenses as well. She has never asked me before signing our daughter up for something and another of her stipulations before she will pick our daughter up from my house is the payment of all past costs.
I know this is incorrect because the decree clearly states we have to "agree in advance as to the minor child's participation in the particular extracurricular activity".
She is using the following statement as her reasoning. "In the event that the parties do not agree to a decision regarding the minor child's well-being and welfare, the residential parent's decision shall prevail". This clearly (I thought) does not apply to extracurricular activities.

She is very vindictive and made verbal statements that she will make me pay for every mistake I made during our marriage. These are just the most recent issues I am battling.

Her most recent email.
I looked at the separation agreement as well last night, as you suggested. It states that the parents can discuss the extracurricular activities, but the residential parent/ legal guardian has the ultimate decision. None of her activities are unreasonable or extraordinarily expensive.

The agreement also states that the non-residential parent is to pay for half of all medical, dental, vision expenses that are not covered by insurance, which I have never requested that you reimburse me for.

As for the transportation section of the guidelines that are in the exhibit attached to the separation agreement, it does say that the residential parent is to pick-up the child at 6pm on Sunday evenings that the child is with the non-residential parent.

So we are clear, I am absolutely willing to live by the exact requirements of our agreement; therefore, you need to pay me all amounts due under the 2 paragraphs above (bill to follow), you need to pick her up every Wednesday, and I will pick her up from your house at 6pm on Sundays.

Thanks.
I am just at a loss for what to do and at the end of my rope dealing with this.
 

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