Can a CO make parental decisions?

[HomeSlice]

Alaska. Hi, I have a question regarding how a Commander can affect a soldier's parental rights. My sister married a soldier and they had a child. She isn't very mentally stable, and she started working as a stripper and he was not ok with this, so they separated and have filed for divorce. She has a new boyfriend now, and is pregnant by him. She is a bad parent, and neglects her child while she strips at night and sleeps all day. My sister has now started calling and texting his CO, accusing her estranged husband of abuse. Can his CO restrict him to the barracks and order him not no contact her and inquire about the well-being of his child? Can his CO order him not to contact CPS to make sure that his child is ok? Can his CO order him to pay spousal support on top of child support ($800 total) when she is already pregnant from her new boyfriend? Finally, can my sister completely shut him down from having any part in their child's life simply by texting his CO in the middle of the night and make wild accusations? Thank you for your time.

 

[Proserpina]

Alaska. Hi, I have a question regarding how a Commander can affect a soldier's parental rights. My sister married a soldier and they had a child. She isn't very mentally stable, and she started working as a stripper and he was not ok with this, so they separated and have filed for divorce. She has a new boyfriend now, and is pregnant by him. She is a bad parent, and neglects her child while she strips at night and sleeps all day. My sister has now started calling and texting his CO, accusing her estranged husband of abuse. Can his CO restrict him to the barracks and order him not no contact her and inquire about the well-being of his child? Can his CO order him not to contact CPS to make sure that his child is ok? Can his CO order him to pay spousal support on top of child support ($800 total) when she is already pregnant from her new boyfriend? Finally, can my sister completely shut him down from having any part in their child's life simply by texting his CO in the middle of the night and make wild accusations? Thank you for your time.

The CO here isn't making parental decisions - rather, the CO can make decisions about the soldier. If personal contact is too disruptive then yes, the CS can place limits on the soldier.

Have YOU contacted CPS?

 

[HomeSlice]

My family has contacted CPS several days ago and nothing has happened. My brother in-law is restricted to the barracks and has been ordered not to do anything. There were legal documents that were supposed to be proof of neglect on my sister's part obtained by my brother in-law, but the CO seized them and they have not been returned. All my sister has to do is text the CO, and he will get screamed at and given more restrictions. Does he really have no power to protect his child?

 

[Proserpina]

My family has contacted CPS several days ago and nothing has happened. My brother in-law is restricted to the barracks and has been ordered not to do anything. There were legal documents that were supposed to be proof of neglect on my sister's part obtained by my brother in-law, but the CO seized them and they have not been returned. All my sister has to do is text the CO, and he will get screamed at and given more restrictions. Does he really have no power to protect his child?

Which legal documents prove she's neglectful?

(hint: if she was, the child likely wouldn't be there at all)

 

[HomeSlice]

Before she was kicked out of their house on post, he went to get something from the house. He had an officer and other ranking individuals with him as witnesses. They found her in bed with the new boyfriend, smoking weed. They also documented the state of the house. It was destroyed. There was a kiddie pool with dirty diapers in it, poop smeared on walls, and over $5k worth of damage that had to be repaired after she left. It was documentation of this.

 

[HomeSlice]

Sorry for the double post, but I figured that I should clarify a couple of things. I am asking these questions because I'm doubting the story given by my brother in-law. I know that my sister is a liar firsthand, but I don't really know him that well. When asked why he isn't doing more to get the child from my sister, these are the reasons I'm given. I doubted his story because I didn't believe that a CO had the ability to order you not to give evidence of neglect to CPS so that the child could be moved somewhere safe. It sounds like he has even fewer rights than I had imagined possible though.

 

[milmom]

Before she was kicked out of their house on post, he went to get something from the house. He had an officer and other ranking individuals with him as witnesses. They found her in bed with the new boyfriend, smoking weed. They also documented the state of the house. It was destroyed. There was a kiddie pool with dirty diapers in it, poop smeared on walls, and over $5k worth of damage that had to be repaired after she left. It was documentation of this.

If she was smoking weed in base housing and a military police officer witnessed it, she would have been detained. I'm guessing at least that part of the story is lacking some truth.

 

[single317dad]

There will be three sides to this story: his, hers, and the truth. I suggest you attempt to find out as much of the truth as possible, then act (or do not act) based on the truth you find. If the child is safe, warm, and fed regularly, then mom's career choice will be irrelevant. Even her sex life will largely be uninteresting to the court, except in certain circumstances.

http://www.courts.alaska.gov/shcspousal.htm

http://www.armyg1.army.mil/rso/usfspa.asp

Mom and/or Dad really should sign up here and ask their own questions, as we have no idea whether there is a provisional court order in place, or any of the actual facts of the case for that matter.

 

[stealth2]

There will be three sides to this story: his, hers, and the truth. I suggest you attempt to find out as much of the truth as possible, then act (or do not act) based on the truth you find. If the child is safe, warm, and fed regularly, then mom's career choice will be irrelevant. Even her sex life will largely be uninteresting to the court, except in certain circumstances.

http://www.courts.alaska.gov/shcspousal.htm

http://www.armyg1.army.mil/rso/usfspa.asp

Mom and/or Dad really should sign up here and ask their own questions, as we have no idea whether there is a provisional court order in place, or any of the actual facts of the case for that matter.

I would disagree with you a bit s317d... OP has already contacted CPS, and it is not time for him/her to butt out in terms of legal stuff.

 

[single317dad]

I would disagree with you a bit s317d... OP has already contacted CPS, and it is not time for him/her to butt out in terms of legal stuff.

Totally agree that OP should follow up on the CPS case they are involved in. The rest of the claims made so far are secondhand information we can't really advise anyone on. Whoever may be trying to assert rights, make claims of unfitness, or question the scope of a CO's authority should be asking specific questions within that context.

 

[Zigner]

Totally agree that OP should follow up on the CPS case they are involved in.

To be clear - the OP isn't involved in any CPS case. CPS does not have to report back to the OP with their findings.

 

[single317dad]

To be clear - the OP isn't involved in any CPS case. CPS does not have to report back to the OP with their findings.

Correct, but they will usually call back asking for more information or sit down for a more detailed interview, assuming further investigation is warranted and the reporting party identified themselves and provided contact information.

 

[Zigner]

...assuming further investigation is warranted...

Exactly !

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

Evidently, according to the story, mom had time to screw her BF, fill a pool with dirty diapers, spread feces on the wall, get high and do $5000 in damage after dad left for his duty station one day.

 

[CJane]

First of all, the MPs that were in attendance when Dad went to the house to get his belongings are mandated reporters. The CANNOT be ordered not to report neglect / abuse, and are in fact REQUIRED to report.

Dad's CO is also a mandated reporter. If he believes that a child is abused/neglected, he is REQUIRED to report it to the local authority.

Dad, depending on his rank, might also be a mandated reporter. Again, if he is, he CANNOT be ordered not to report abuse/neglect, and is REQUIRED to report.

While Dad can be restricted to barracks, it would generally take something more concrete than a "text at 2am" to do so. And only a court order can force an allocation of his pay. Though, if they're still married and Mom cannot live on base, she may be entitled to a portion of his housing allowance.