Can I just up and leave without a word?

[shariblev]

What is the name of your state? Maryland
I want to leave my husband of 5 years. I have a 3 year old boy and my husband is a terrible father to him as well as being a terrible husband. I'm afraid if I tell him I'm leaving he will try to stop me. He has not been physically abusive but does have a habit of throwing things when he is angry. Are there any legal disadvantages if I just wait until he's at work and just take our son and our belongings and leave? Custody will not be an issue since he spends absolutely no time with our son and doesn't really want to have anything to do with him.

[HomeGuru]

Originally Posted by shariblev

What is the name of your state? Maryland
I want to leave my husband of 5 years. I have a 3 year old boy and my husband is a terrible father to him as well as being a terrible husband. I'm afraid if I tell him I'm leaving he will try to stop me. He has not been physically abusive but does have a habit of throwing things when he is angry. Are there any legal disadvantages if I just wait until he's at work and just take our son and our belongings and leave? Custody will not be an issue since he spends absolutely no time with our son and doesn't really want to have anything to do with him.

**A: are you employed? Can you support yourself and your son? Have you visited a divorce attorney yet?

[shariblev]

I am employed (I make more money than my husband). I plan to move in with my mother until I can find a place of my own. I haven't found an attorney yet. I can't really afford one right now but I can't stay any longer.

[stealth2]

What state does your Mom live in?

[davgud82]

Originally Posted by shariblev

What is the name of your state? Maryland
I want to leave my husband of 5 years. I have a 3 year old boy and my husband is a terrible father to him as well as being a terrible husband. I'm afraid if I tell him I'm leaving he will try to stop me. He has not been physically abusive but does have a habit of throwing things when he is angry. Are there any legal disadvantages if I just wait until he's at work and just take our son and our belongings and leave? Custody will not be an issue since he spends absolutely no time with our son and doesn't really want to have anything to do with him.

i am in WA... and to let you be aware with the son issure you may say he has nothing to do with you or him but he can make an awful court battle and say he wants custody. i see this all the time. Just be careful....

[BelizeBreeze]

I suggest you think long and hard about this before filing a dissolution of the marriage.

Most courts and experts agree that except in unusual cases it is most important for a child to have a strong relationship with both parents. Thus, courts will typically conclude that an award of custody to the parent who is most likely to foster a relationship between the child and the other parent is in the child's best interests. For this reason, if a custodial parent has demonstrated in the past a pattern of interference with the relationship between the child and the noncustodial parent, unless other facts dictate a different holding, courts will frequently conclude that a substantial change in circumstances justifying a change of custody has occurred.

Not surprisingly, there is a long-standing tradition of awarding a change of custody where the custodial parent has interfered with the parental rights of the other parent. The Court of Appeals of Maryland clearly established this point in Berlin v. Berlin, 239 Md. 52, 210 A.2d 380 (1965). In Berlin, the parties entered into a written separation agreement. Pursuant to the agreement, incorporated into the court's order, custody of the children was awarded to the mother, and the father received reasonable visitation rights. In addition, the parties also agreed that the mother would notify the father if the mother moved out of the Washington metropolitan area. Subsequently, the mother began denying the father his right to visitation. For this reason, the father requested a change in custody. The trial court granted the father's request, and the mother appealed.

On appeal, the Court of Appeals of Maryland held that the trial court properly changed custody to the father. As support for its decision, the court noted only that "the record indicates that the mother had deprived the father of his rights of visitation for a substantial period of time and that he is a fit and proper person to have custody of the children." 210 A.2d at 384. Thus, in Maryland, where a parent has attempted to create emotional distance between the other parent and the child, that parent has committed an act so egregious that the other parent could be awarded custody based solely on this one fact.

You may belive that custody will not be an issue, but once you file for divorce, the rules change and the fact that you left with the child without provision for the father to exercise his legal rights, can and will be a factor in the determination of custody.

[shariblev]

My mother lives in the same state within 30 minutes of where I live now.

I will allow the father to see our son. I will not deny him that. My mother-in-law (who watches our son every day) lives right next door to where we are living now so the father could go over there after work every day (if he wanted to). I have discussed leaving with my mother-in-law and she is in favor of this and has agreed to continue watching our son.