Can I move out of the apartment we rent once our lease expires before divorcing?

[masimo125]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arizona.

Recently I discovered that my wife of 7 years has been cheating on me for some time with different people, I even contracted STD from her, and she is in love with another man. She has been spending money I earn well beyond our means on frivolous purchases and services and accumulated tens of thousands in debt that she is hiding from me. She hasn't been contributing to our marriage in ANY way for at least a year and she turned into an expert liar. In any case, I'm going to divorce my wife. But before that I want to protect what I still have.

Can I just move out of the apartment we live in once our lease expires? I mean is it legal, will it hurt my divorce proceedings, etc? Together with moving out I would simply take my personal possessions, close my banking account so she won't be able to abuse it any more, ask post office to forward my mail to my new address and file for divorce.

We have no children and she has no job or income. We also have separate banking accounts, separate credit cards, and our cars are separately titled. Her car is paid off. I am not a co-signer of any debt she has accumulated. It's just that she has had access to my account so she could pay her credit cards, etc. We are co-signers for the apartment lease.

I mean is it legal to stop supporting her and get out of this imposible abusive situation and then filing for the divorce?

Thank so so so much for nay help anybody can provide!

 

[penelope10]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arizona.

Recently I discovered that my wife of 7 years has been cheating on me for some time with different people, I even contracted STD from her, and she is in love with another man. She has been spending money I earn well beyond our means on frivolous purchases and services and accumulated tens of thousands in debt that she is hiding from me. She hasn't been contributing to our marriage in ANY way for at least a year and she turned into an expert liar. In any case, I'm going to divorce my wife. But before that I want to protect what I still have.

Can I just move out of the apartment we live in once our lease expires? I mean is it legal, will it hurt my divorce proceedings, etc? Together with moving out I would simply take my personal possessions, close my banking account so she won't be able to abuse it any more, ask post office to forward my mail to my new address and file for divorce.

We have no children and she has no job or income. We also have separate banking accounts, separate credit cards, and our cars are separately titled. Her car is paid off. I am not a co-signer of any debt she has accumulated. It's just that she has had access to my account so she could pay her credit cards, etc. We are co-signers for the apartment lease.

I mean is it legal to stop supporting her and get out of this imposible abusive situation and then filing for the divorce?

Thank so so so much for nay help anybody can provide!

How is she misusing your bank account if her name is not on it?

You should check with your landlord regarding notification about you vacating the property upon the expiration of the lease. (In other words you are divorcing---if your wife wishes to keep the apartment on a month to month basis how can you be assured that you are released from liability).

 

[JETX]

Can I just move out of the apartment we live in once our lease expires?

Yes. Make sure that you notify your landlord in WRITING that YOU intend to leave at the end of your lease.

I mean is it legal, will it hurt my divorce proceedings, etc?

Yes, it's legal. And it should NOT hurt your divorce. However, you should realize that your wife is liable to file for an emergency order of support. The court will hold a hearing and determine what her income potential is. Very likely that you would have to pay SOME type of support for a limited amount of time.

 

[masimo125]

How is she misusing your bank account if her name is not on it?

We have one joint account where my paycheck is deposited to and both of us use it to pay bills, credit cards, etc. She uses her credit cards a lot and pays minimum payment with my account so it's not obvious that she is spending that much, has ~30k in debt.

Yes. Make sure that you notify your landlord in WRITING that YOU intend to leave at the end of your lease.

Thank you! Will do. I wonder if they would contact her to include her name. They probably won't be that careful. Plus I can SAY to them we will move but I put in writing I will move.

Yes, it's legal. And it should NOT hurt your divorce. However, you should realize that your wife is liable to file for an emergency order of support. The court will hold a hearing and determine what her income potential is. Very likely that you would have to pay SOME type of support for a limited amount of time.

Thank you so so much!!

What does mean "limited amount of time"? Limited to 3 months or 5 years? Is that alimony or is alimony secondary? Anything to watch for when this is discussed in court? My income is ~8.5k/month gross; how much would I be expected to pay? Does the fact that I have a $860 car payment while I paid of her car already make any difference? She hasn't completed BS degree in 15 years, she two exams left. She never worked or earned any money in her life. I supported her 15 years, 7 of which we were a married couple.

Today I cought her again sleeping around; I don't think they noticed. It makes me feel so abused...

 

[masimo125]

I'm going to move out of the apartment as soon as I get a full day that she won't be present to move my stuff to a storage unit and I may just sleep at work for a few days. How would this process look like if I "kind of" disappeared - quit job, moved out of state, etc and let her chase me? I don't want to do anything illegal but I don't want to make it easy on her and her boyfriend to rob me. She has all the time in the World while I have to work so it's hard to fight them.

 

[masimo125]

Please allow one last question, could I still file maried filling jointly for taxes at the end of the year?

 

[LdiJ]

Please allow one last question, could I still file maried filling jointly for taxes at the end of the year?

Let me address something that has not been addressed here. AZ is a community property state, therefore the marital debts and assets are anything that accrued during the marriage. Therefore if her debts accrued during the marriage, you are going to be held responsible for 1/2.

As far as the taxes are concerned...you may NOT file a joint return with her without her signature (or her express approval if you file electronically without using a preparer), if you are still legally married as of 12/31/2008, and if your divorce is final before the end of the year (unlikely) you may NOT file a joint return with her, even if she agrees.

Please understand, even with an electronic filing it requires the express approval of both spouses for the return to be filed jointly.

 

[mistoffolees]

I'm going to move out of the apartment as soon as I get a full day that she won't be present to move my stuff to a storage unit and I may just sleep at work for a few days. How would this process look like if I "kind of" disappeared - quit job, moved out of state, etc and let her chase me? I don't want to do anything illegal but I don't want to make it easy on her and her boyfriend to rob me. She has all the time in the World while I have to work so it's hard to fight them.

This looks like you're trying to evade your legal responsibilities and to escape the court's jurisdiction. First, it's not likely to work (if her attorney is any good, she'll track you down and then you'll end up spending a fortune in legal fees). Second, it will look very bad in front of the judge and you can count on not getting a break on anything. Since the judge has the discretion to divide the assets differently than 50:50 in OH, you may lose there, as well. Finally, it's just plain wrong.

 

[LdiJ]

This looks like you're trying to evade your legal responsibilities and to escape the court's jurisdiction. First, it's not likely to work (if her attorney is any good, she'll track you down and then you'll end up spending a fortune in legal fees). Second, it will look very bad in front of the judge and you can count on not getting a break on anything. Since the judge has the discretion to divide the assets differently than 50:50 in OH, you may lose there, as well. Finally, it's just plain wrong.

He is not in OH, he is in AZ, and AZ is a community property state. However, I agree that it would be a really stupid thing to do.

 

[Bali Hai]

He is not in OH, he is in AZ, and AZ is a community property state. However, I agree that it would be a really stupid thing to do.

What if he were to leave the US and marry a younger, extremely beautiful and wealthy woman from another country and live the life of the rich and famous jet-setting the world?

Would that be a really stupid thing to do??

 

[LdiJ]

What if he were to leave the US and marry a younger, extremely beautiful and wealthy woman from another country and live the life of the rich and famous jet-setting the world?

Would that be a really stupid thing to do??

Since that isn't even remotely what is going on here, its a moot question.

 

[mistoffolees]

He is not in OH, he is in AZ, and AZ is a community property state. However, I agree that it would be a really stupid thing to do.

Sorry, I got two threads confused. The difference doesn't change my response, though.

 

[masimo125]

Sincere thanks for your effort. It's really appreciated. No, I don't plan on ust leaving my wife although it wouldn't be undeservered givcen what she has done to me. I understand it's in our both best interest to sort things out smoothly. Thank you again!