Cruel & Inhuman in NY?

[overthis]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

My friend has a history with anxiety. Her husband is passive agressive.

He began showing up very late from work and even leaving the house at night for hours at a clip with no explanation about eight weeks ago.

They have a 2-year-old but he assumes no responsibility for the child seeing as he leaves when he feels like it. The burden is on her and a daycare provider. My friend tries to talk to him, he doesn't respond to her calls or says he's busy. But he finds time to talk to others including a female friend multiple times a day, and my friend can see this in their cell phone records.

She is getting rashes from anxiety (and has medical documentation) and is breaking out in hives regularly.

Their 2-year-old son has a new phrase in his vocabulary: "Mommy crying? Don't cry Mommy."

I know him, his actions are purposeful and he is doing this because he knows it hurts her.

Does this constitute grounds for cruel and inhuman treatment? Is there anything she can do to get him out of her house and away from her? I can't sit by and watch her be in so much pain for no reason. What recourse does she have?

 

[Bali Hai]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

My friend has a history with anxiety. Her husband is passive agressive.

He began showing up very late from work and even leaving the house at night for hours at a clip with no explanation about eight weeks ago.

They have a 2-year-old but he assumes no responsibility for the child seeing as he leaves when he feels like it. The burden is on her and a daycare provider. My friend tries to talk to him, he doesn't respond to her calls or says he's busy. But he finds time to talk to others including a female friend multiple times a day, and my friend can see this in their cell phone records.

She is getting rashes from anxiety (and has medical documentation) and is breaking out in hives regularly.

Their 2-year-old son has a new phrase in his vocabulary: "Mommy crying? Don't cry Mommy."

I know him, his actions are purposeful and he is doing this because he knows it hurts her.

Does this constitute grounds for cruel and inhuman treatment? Is there anything she can do to get him out of her house and away from her? I can't sit by and watch her be in so much pain for no reason. What recourse does she have?

She can get a lawyer and file for divorce.

Cruel and inhuman treatment is used extensively in NY divorces when there are no real grounds for a fault divorce. Farting in bed can be cruel and inhuman treatment.

 

[overthis]

Thank you

Thank you for your quick reply - it's a relief.

 

[Rushia]

She can get a lawyer and file for divorce.

Cruel and inhuman treatment is used extensively in NY divorces when there are no real grounds for a fault divorce. Farting in bed can be cruel and inhuman treatment.

Sorry OP, I have no advice but wanted to say ROTFLMAO over the farting in bed!

 

[mistoffolees]

Does this constitute grounds for cruel and inhuman treatment? Is there anything she can do to get him out of her house and away from her? I can't sit by and watch her be in so much pain for no reason. What recourse does she have?

As Bali said, Cruel and inhuman treatment (seems that this should be 'inhumane', but I didn't write the laws) is very commonly used to file for divorce in NY. It's very loosely applied (you don't need to show up for court with bruises all over your body, for example) and most judges allow it essentially in place of no-fault divorce.

For the rest of your questions, she can not get him out of the house by herself. However, when she files for divorce, she can ask for temporary custody of the child and temporary possession of the house - which would allow her to keep him out.

Can she afford the house on her own (including paying her stbx 1/2 of the marital equity in cash or other assets)? If not, she'll need to make plans to sell it.

 

[overthis]

good to know

That's good to know -- we'll discuss the temporary aspects with her attorney. She can afford the house payments on her own and hopefully can hang onto it. Thank you so much for your response, it's helpful and will help put her mind at ease. It's too bad this world can't just be full of good people who do the right thing.

One last question: How long does a divorce on these grounds take? And if she puts the temporary aspects in her filing, is there typically an initial ruling on those temporary pieces and then a final divorce ruling down the line? Thanks again.

 

[Isis1]

She can get a lawyer and file for divorce.

Cruel and inhuman treatment is used extensively in NY divorces when there are no real grounds for a fault divorce. Farting in bed can be cruel and inhuman treatment.

Thank you for your quick reply - it's a relief.

i choked on my water**************

 

[Zigner]

As Bali said, Cruel and inhuman treatment (seems that this should be 'inhumane', but I didn't write the laws)

Actually, inhuman is probably a more fitting word in this situation. They are very very similar in meaning.

 

[mistoffolees]

Actually, inhuman is probably a more fitting word in this situation. They are very very similar in meaning.

Actually, I was thinking of what appears to be the second definition of 'inhuman' (not human) - which is what I think of when I hear the word. The first definition is roughly the same as inhumane (lacking compassion, etc), so I guess inhuman is OK.

 

[Rushia]

That's good to know -- we'll discuss the temporary aspects with her attorney. She can afford the house payments on her own and hopefully can hang onto it. Thank you so much for your response, it's helpful and will help put her mind at ease. It's too bad this world can't just be full of good people who do the right thing.

One last question: How long does a divorce on these grounds take? And if she puts the temporary aspects in her filing, is there typically an initial ruling on those temporary pieces and then a final divorce ruling down the line? Thanks again.

I can only state my experience with this as I was divorced in NY under those same grounds. I was separated from my ex for a year, filed the paperwork, he defaulted, court was 3.5 months from filing and final decree was issued 6.5 months from original filing.