Dad needs help re: custody of young child

[GreatDad55]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Georgia

I wasn't sure which forum to post this in, hopefully I picked the right one. To summarize: I've been married for 16 years. Wife is 20 years younger. She's far more educated than I but has never kept a job longer than a few months due to inability to get along with anyone. She is excessively emotionally abusive & has been known to attack me. No official record of it, however, as I was always too embarrassed to report it.

She is currently a SAHM to our two year old toddler.
I work full time to support the family. Since having the baby, her verbal assaults have become more frequent. She has also left with the baby several times and fled to her mother's (one hour away) after getting angry at me. She has stayed gone a week at a time. Her mom has a very small one bedroom apartment so it's not a good set up for the baby. Each time this happens, I beg her to come home because I miss the baby. She IS currently home but is threatening to leave again. She takes the baby in order to punish me. I am trying to keep her at the house as long as I can in order to build a case before filing for divorce (based on her verbal & physical abuse).

My question is: Is there ANYTHING I can do to prevent her from taking the baby again? As a father, I keep reading where she has no more legal rights to the child than I do, yet it seems as though women can used the children as a weapon to punish the husband. They can leave whenever they want & take the kids at will. What is my best defense against allowing her to continue taking my child from the house? Thank you for your advice and time.

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Georgia

I wasn't sure which forum to post this in, hopefully I picked the right one. To summarize: I've been married for 16 years. Wife is 20 years younger. She's far more educated than I but has never kept a job longer than a few months due to inability to get along with anyone. She is excessively emotionally abusive & has been known to attack me. No official record of it, however, as I was always too embarrassed to report it.

She is currently a SAHM to our two year old toddler.
I work full time to support the family. Since having the baby, her verbal assaults have become more frequent. She has also left with the baby several times and fled to her mother's (one hour away) after getting angry at me. She has stayed gone a week at a time. Her mom has a very small one bedroom apartment so it's not a good set up for the baby. Each time this happens, I beg her to come home because I miss the baby. She IS currently home but is threatening to leave again. She takes the baby in order to punish me. I am trying to keep her at the house as long as I can in order to build a case before filing for divorce (based on her verbal & physical abuse).

My question is: Is there ANYTHING I can do to prevent her from taking the baby again? As a father, I keep reading where she has no more legal rights to the child than I do, yet it seems as though women can used the children as a weapon to punish the husband. They can leave whenever they want & take the kids at will. What is my best defense against allowing her to continue taking my child from the house? Thank you for your advice and time.

File for divorce IMMEDIATELY and request temporary custody pending a final determination. You don't need to build a case; Georgia allows for a "no-fault" divorce.

Otherwise... well, she can take the child wherever and whenever she wants, and you can do the same thing.

 

[GreatDad55]

File for divorce IMMEDIATELY and request temporary custody pending a final determination. You don't need to build a case; Georgia allows for a "no-fault" divorce.

Otherwise... well, she can take the child wherever and whenever she wants, and you can do the same thing.

I was hoping to get enough 'proof' of her emotional instability as I intend on pursuing custody once I file. Since she's the primary provider, still breast feeding (and will be 'til college if she has her way), co-sleeping, etc, she has a better than great chance of keeping the baby & me getting the standard few weekends a month visitation. That's not acceptable to me. If I file NOW I'm afraid I'll lose everything, but it seems no matter what I do I'm destined to lose. I truly want what's best for the baby and her mental state gives me great concern for his well being. But again, nothing I can 'prove', at least not right now. It's such a crappy position to be in. Thanks for your advice, though.

 

[Silverplum]

I was hoping to get enough 'proof' of her emotional instability as I intend on pursuing custody once I file. Since she's the primary provider, still breast feeding (and will be 'til college if she has her way), co-sleeping, etc, she has a better than great chance of keeping the baby & me getting the standard few weekends a month visitation. That's not acceptable to me. If I file NOW I'm afraid I'll lose everything, but it seems no matter what I do I'm destined to lose. I truly want what's best for the baby and her mental state gives me great concern for his well being. But again, nothing I can 'prove', at least not right now. It's such a crappy position to be in. Thanks for your advice, though.

You're tilting at windmills. Go consult with a few divorce attorneys and learn your options.