divorce with inlaws

[tkirk3695]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Alabama
In the divorce I am trying to pursue. my ex had sent a responce to my divorce papers. in them she is requesting that I pay 6000 for a car her dad purchased in 2000 for me. he kept title in his name. we had nothing but verbal agreements. in 2001 she traded that car in and bought a truck. dad signed the title over to dealership. in 2003 she traded that truck in and bought another one. in 2006 i bought last truck off her. Dad said after we were married not to worry bout paying for car. Am I still liable to pay the car back? please help!! very confused

 

[Farfalla]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Alabama
In the divorce I am trying to pursue. my ex had sent a responce to my divorce papers. in them she is requesting that I pay 6000 for a car her dad purchased in 2000 for me. he kept title in his name. we had nothing but verbal agreements. in 2001 she traded that car in and bought a truck. dad signed the title over to dealership. in 2003 she traded that truck in and bought another one. in 2006 i bought last truck off her. Dad said after we were married not to worry bout paying for car. Am I still liable to pay the car back? please help!! very confused

When did you get married?

He kept the car in his name hence he owned it not you.
He used it as trade in for a car for his daughter.

I don't think she has a leg to stand on.

 

[tkirk3695]

I hope she doesn't have anything. I asked for a total of 8 items from marriage. and she has done everything i asked for. then she sends me this. in her papers she wants a total of 9000.00 plus the 2008 stimulus check(the whole thing) and for me to pay all court cost and fees. We have been split 6 or 8 weeks. since then she has moved someone in with her( a boyfriend i guess) . She has been seeing this guy for 3 weeks now. I want to get this over with so i can move on. But she wants all this money. I make 13.00 an hour. she makes 26.00 an hour. Who can afford it more. not me. I am currently living on couches where ever i can find a place because when handed her the papers she emptied all the bank accounts. and let me with several thousand in bad checks i been having to pay off. but looks like i am getting the shaft on this one. Learned something though: Poor fellers shouldn't marry rich girl.oh got married in 2001. lived in her parents apartment they owned.

 

[Farfalla]

I hope she doesn't have anything. I asked for a total of 8 items from marriage. and she has done everything i asked for. then she sends me this. in her papers she wants a total of 9000.00 plus the 2008 stimulus check(the whole thing) and for me to pay all court cost and fees. We have been split 6 or 8 weeks. since then she has moved someone in with her( a boyfriend i guess) . She has been seeing this guy for 3 weeks now. I want to get this over with so i can move on. But she wants all this money. I make 13.00 an hour. she makes 26.00 an hour. Who can afford it more. not me. I am currently living on couches where ever i can find a place because when handed her the papers she emptied all the bank accounts. and let me with several thousand in bad checks i been having to pay off. but looks like i am getting the shaft on this one. Learned something though: Poor fellers shouldn't marry rich girl.oh got married in 2001. lived in her parents apartment they owned.

Do you have an attorney?

You can ask that the legal fees be paid out of marital assets/income or that she pay them since she makes twice as much as you do.

You might be able to show that she drained the accounts by getting bank statements that show a mass withdrawal and things like copies of checks that she signed to get the money. The money is still a marital asset.

What is the 9000.00 ? 6K for the car right? What is the other 3K for.

From what you have said, the bad checks were caused by her withdrawing the money… they are marital debt.

How much money did she withdraw when she emptied all your accounts?

 

[mistoffolees]

I hope she doesn't have anything. I asked for a total of 8 items from marriage. and she has done everything i asked for. then she sends me this. in her papers she wants a total of 9000.00 plus the 2008 stimulus check(the whole thing) and for me to pay all court cost and fees. We have been split 6 or 8 weeks. since then she has moved someone in with her( a boyfriend i guess) . She has been seeing this guy for 3 weeks now. I want to get this over with so i can move on. But she wants all this money. I make 13.00 an hour. she makes 26.00 an hour. Who can afford it more. not me. I am currently living on couches where ever i can find a place because when handed her the papers she emptied all the bank accounts. and let me with several thousand in bad checks i been having to pay off. but looks like i am getting the shaft on this one. Learned something though: Poor fellers shouldn't marry rich girl.oh got married in 2001. lived in her parents apartment they owned.

You should really see an attorney. Many attorneys will give you one consultation for free. Beyond that, they can petition the court to have their fees taken from marital assets.

That said, people can ask for all sorts of things - that doesn't mean they're going to get it. My ex makes $75 K but she still asked the court for spousal support greater than my entire take home pay for 10 years (we were married for 14) and about 90% of our marital assets. Obviously, some people think it's a reasonable negotiating tactic to make absurdly huge claims at first and then be 'reasonable' by backing down somewhat from the initial claim. Maybe it even works. In any event, don't let her claims bother you. What matters is what you can negotiate as a final settlement, or if that fails, what the court orders.

Basically, you would be entitled to half of marital assets and she would get half of marital debts (including bad checks). From what you're saying, the value of what you're giving up might easily be higher than the attorney's fees, even if you have to pay them.

Court costs and fees CAN be assigned to one person or the other, but typically when one makes a very high income ($26 per hour probably doesn't cut it). Most commonly, the fees will be split or taken from marital assets before they're split.

In principle, if you've been married for 10 years or more, you could ask for spousal support, as well. With a 2:1 income difference, it wouldn't be out of the question, so it's at least worth asking (if for no other reason than as a negotiating position to make her be more reasonable on the property split--basically giving her back some of what she's giving you).

You didn't mention kids. If there are kids, it gets more complicated.

 

[tkirk3695]

no kids. 1500.00 is for half a boat's value and a motorcycle. the other 1500 is for a cellphone bill(mine but in her moms name). gas on a credit card,(family vacation that i drove her car on) ( and some building materials I have on her moms credit card. I do have an Attorney, she is just tied up in court and can't return phone calls or meet with me for a few weeks. they only give me 15 days from signing this to pay the 3000 then 30 days to pay the 6000.she withdrawsed only about 1500.00. we had more at one point but I was laid off when my plant closed and we usd saving to pay bills along with her check. she never kept up with the bills. she asked to take them over one time, i place on refrig like she wanted. they were still there 3 months later and i had to catch them up. I was told by another peron to sign this then during 15 days file for bankruptacy, that way can make payments and not pay full amount in that ridiculous time frame. is this legal? or ethical? very confused now

 

[Farfalla]

no kids. 1500.00 is for half a boat's value and a motorcycle. the other 1500 is for a cellphone bill(mine but in her moms name). gas on a credit card,(family vacation that i drove her car on) ( and some building materials I have on her moms credit card. I do have an Attorney, she is just tied up in court and can't return phone calls or meet with me for a few weeks. they only give me 15 days from signing this to pay the 3000 then 30 days to pay the 6000.she withdrawsed only about 1500.00. we had more at one point but I was laid off when my plant closed and we usd saving to pay bills along with her check. she never kept up with the bills. she asked to take them over one time, i place on refrig like she wanted. they were still there 3 months later and i had to catch them up. I was told by another peron to sign this then during 15 days file for bankruptacy, that way can make payments and not pay full amount in that ridiculous time frame. is this legal? or ethical? very confused now

Does your wife have an attorney? Did the demand for payment come from her attorney?

15 days from siging what? The demand? Don't sign anything without your attorney looking it over first. Have you sent the demand to your attorney or her assistant? It might take 5 minitues or so for her to assess what to do about it and to give you advice.

The idea of signing it and filing for bankruptcy sounds like a very foolish thing to do. Most if not all that your wife is demanding falls into that 'she can ask for anything but she's probably not going to get it' ball park.

----1500.00 is for half a boat's value and a motorcycle – will be part of marital property split. This is part of the divorce property settlement.

----1500 is for a cellphone bill(mine but in her moms name) – sounds like her parents did a lot to support the both of you. They may lose a lot of this here

----gas on a credit card,(family vacation that i drove her car on) – marital debt,

---- ( and some building materials I have on her moms credit card – what was this material for?

----she withdrawsed only about 1500.00. - a marital asset. Do you know if she still has it? Or is it now spent?

 

[tkirk3695]

she still has the money. the boat was bought in my name only and so was motorcycle. her lawyer sent the papers to my lawyer. in turn she mailed them to me. the building materials was for a job i did for another person. they were supposed to give me the bill when it came and never did. i can get the money for the 3000 but don't know if i can in 15 days. its mainly the 6000 i am worried about. Am i within rights to pffer her a monthly payment? Alabama is a different state from what the legal assistant told me. even though I have proof of her other relationship i can not use it against her. is she intitled to all of the $1200 stimulus check( my lawyer has it) ? What about next years taxes, how does that work? sorry for som many questions!

 

[majomom1]

Does your wife have an attorney? Did the demand for payment come from her attorney?

15 days from siging what? The demand? Don't sign anything without your attorney looking it over first. Have you sent the demand to your attorney or her assistant? It might take 5 minitues or so for her to assess what to do about it and to give you advice.

The idea of signing it and filing for bankruptcy sounds like a very foolish thing to do. Most if not all that your wife is demanding falls into that 'she can ask for anything but she's probably not going to get it' ball park.

----1500.00 is for half a boat's value and a motorcycle – will be part of marital property split. This is part of the divorce property settlement.

Handle in property settlement

----1500 is for a cellphone bill(mine but in her moms name) – sounds like her parents did a lot to support the both of you. They may lose a lot of this here

OP should pay this. He admits it is his phone and should be adult enough to take that bill. How in the world does one manage to get $1500 on a cell phone bill?


----gas on a credit card,(family vacation that i drove her car on) – marital debt,

---- ( and some building materials I have on her moms credit card – what was this material for?

This should be included in property settlement.

----she withdrawsed only about 1500.00. - a marital asset. Do you know if she still has it? Or is it now spent?

Until there is a court order, she cannot demand anything, or set deadlines for payment.

But also... it looks like OP had no problem soaking up all this "help"... he needs to grow up and take responsibility for all that he owes and include it in the marital debt.

Signing anything, then filing for divorce - well, it doesn't work that way.

 

[tkirk3695]

please reread this whole post slowly. 1500 is not just for cell phone bill. its a total her parents want for a bunch of stuff(phone bill, bills on credit card) I never asked for any of that from them. I tried to get my own phone but she wouldn't let me. As far as needed help. My inlaws never let my wife grow up. We never could leave them. I cooked and fed myself at our pace. she ate with them. they did her laundry and everything. I kept our house clean,laundry that was there done and did all dishes and stuff. I work full time and go to school full time. I offered to pay that phone bill off when it was due but they had her drain our accounts so i couldn't because of paying off the bad checks to keep outta jail. They are money hungry people who thinks the world owes them something. I did all the home maintence for there whole family free of charge. Now all they say is that i used them. hey but this is just a forum, so you can have your own opinion. I did the best thing i could, I gave her everything that was worth anything . all i asked for was clothes a 13 inch tv, my dog a truck with blown motor, boat that is being repaired and an old wrecked motorcyle. She got everything in the house,including the 52 inch plasma all furniture and 2 acres of land, that we had bought. i never asked for any of that. and don't want it.

 

[seniorjudge]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Alabama
In the divorce I am trying to pursue. my ex had sent a responce to my divorce papers. in them she is requesting that I pay 6000 for a car her dad purchased in 2000 for me. he kept title in his name. we had nothing but verbal agreements. in 2001 she traded that car in and bought a truck. dad signed the title over to dealership. in 2003 she traded that truck in and bought another one. in 2006 i bought last truck off her. Dad said after we were married not to worry bout paying for car. Am I still liable to pay the car back? please help!! very confused

Q: Am I still liable to pay the car back?

A: This will be decided in your lawsuit. We have no way of knowing how it will turn out.

 

[Zigner]

And I suggest that you hire a different attorney...

 

[Farfalla]

I gave her everything that was worth anything . all i asked for was clothes a 13 inch tv, my dog a truck with blown motor, boat that is being repaired and an old wrecked motorcyle. She got everything in the house,including the 52 inch plasma all furniture and 2 acres of land, that we had bought. i never asked for any of that. and don't want it.

No the stimulus check is not 100% hers.

What do you mean you gave her everything? There has not been a property settlement yet. It seems that nothing has been decided.

What about the 2 acres of land. How much equity is in the land? Is there a loan on the land? If so whose name is the loan?

 

[mistoffolees]

please reread this whole post slowly. 1500 is not just for cell phone bill. its a total her parents want for a bunch of stuff(phone bill, bills on credit card) I never asked for any of that from them. I tried to get my own phone but she wouldn't let me. As far as needed help. .

You've already got your answer (several times, in fact). They can ask for whatever they want, but you have no obligation to provide it until a court orders you to.

If it's not from the court and signed by the judge, it's probably irrelevant, although you should show anything you receive to your attorney.

If your attorney is unwilling to even talk with you for several weeks, I'd seriously consider getting a different attorney or ask her to transfer you to an associate. A few days I can understand, but a few weeks without making provisions for her clients is too long, IMHO.