Do I have to pay my ex?

[rolling along]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? We began in AL, moved to CT, then I moved to WA and she moved back to AL. I am currently in WA and she's in AL.

My ex and I dated for just short of 4 years. We both graduated college in 2013 and moved in together in AL while job hunting. Within a month of moving in together she got offered a job in CT. She wasn't going to go without me so I told her that I would move there with her for her, even though I had no prospects of a job or anything. We ended up getting an apartment that we could hardly afford on just her income alone, but thought it would be ok since I was going to get a job soon. I applied everywhere, within my field of study, restaurants, clothing stores, everywhere... No one would hire me so we ended up dipping deep into her savings accounts. She was insistent on keeping up with everything that we spent so that I could pay her back once I started working. After 7 months I got a job and began working 50-70 hour weeks to cut down on my debt. I sold my vehicle to help out too. Then I got into graduate school in WA. She wasn't liking her job so when it came time for me to move, she moved back to AL. We broke up a couple of months later and there is still ~$10,000 that I "owe" her. I have made a few monthly payments of $50, but even that is really hard to afford on my $800/month student salary.

We discussed our future while living in CT and about how I was going to pay her back all the money I owed her from there and how when I got a job that made significantly more than her (which is/was highly likely due to our degree differences), we would be equal financially and it would be our money, not my money.

We never signed any agreement or contract or anything, there is just the Google Spreadsheet that lists all of my debts and payments made on those debts. There are a couple of texts discussing what should/shouldn't go on the list, but nothing saying that I would pay her back in full. Just one text has her thanking me for sending monthly payments for the past few months.

Am I legally bound to pay her back all that I owe her? Could she take me to court and win? I can't afford court nor can I afford to pay her back.

Sorry for the wall of text here, I just didn't know how to explain it in shorter terms. I also didn't want to leave anything out that could potentially be important. Thanks for any and all responses!

 

[Just Blue]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? We began in AL, moved to CT, then I moved to WA and she moved back to AL. I am currently in WA and she's in AL.

My ex and I dated for just short of 4 years. We both graduated college in 2013 and moved in together in AL while job hunting. Within a month of moving in together she got offered a job in CT. She wasn't going to go without me so I told her that I would move there with her for her, even though I had no prospects of a job or anything. We ended up getting an apartment that we could hardly afford on just her income alone, but thought it would be ok since I was going to get a job soon. I applied everywhere, within my field of study, restaurants, clothing stores, everywhere... No one would hire me so we ended up dipping deep into her savings accounts. She was insistent on keeping up with everything that we spent so that I could pay her back once I started working. After 7 months I got a job and began working 50-70 hour weeks to cut down on my debt. I sold my vehicle to help out too. Then I got into graduate school in WA. She wasn't liking her job so when it came time for me to move, she moved back to AL. We broke up a couple of months later and there is still ~$10,000 that I "owe" her. I have made a few monthly payments of $50, but even that is really hard to afford on my $800/month student salary.

We discussed our future while living in CT and about how I was going to pay her back all the money I owed her from there and how when I got a job that made significantly more than her (which is/was highly likely due to our degree differences), we would be equal financially and it would be our money, not my money.

We never signed any agreement or contract or anything, there is just the Google Spreadsheet that lists all of my debts and payments made on those debts. There are a couple of texts discussing what should/shouldn't go on the list, but nothing saying that I would pay her back in full. Just one text has her thanking me for sending monthly payments for the past few months.

Am I legally bound to pay her back all that I owe her? Could she take me to court and win? I can't afford court nor can I afford to pay her back.

Sorry for the wall of text here, I just didn't know how to explain it in shorter terms. I also didn't want to leave anything out that could potentially be important. Thanks for any and all responses!

Forget the legal ...Don't you think morally you should?

 

[rolling along]

She wasn't really considering morals when she was cheating on me. And she is the most selfish person that I have ever met, it just took me a while to actually see it. So I do not want to pay her back. I moved there for her without a job to support her. And like I said, to her, that was HER money and when I got a job it was going to be OUR money.

So I'm just asking from a legal standpoint. That's why I left that stuff out of the original post, so sides wouldn't be taken based on outside factors.

 

[Proserpina]

She wasn't really considering morals when she was cheating on me. And she is the most selfish person that I have ever met, it just took me a while to actually see it. So I do not want to pay her back. I moved there for her without a job to support her. And like I said, to her, that was HER money and when I got a job it was going to be OUR money.

So I'm just asking from a legal standpoint. That's why I left that stuff out of the original post, so sides wouldn't be taken based on outside factors.

If she can prove that it was a loan - and she apparently does have proof that you were paying her a certain amount each month which does support that claim - then she'll likely stand a good chance in small claims.

If not, then obviously ... no.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

As Pro noted, it will be up to the judge. Love on a promise seldom works out. When things are over, you walk away. If you do not accept any certified letters without investigating them, a good practice, you should be fine. That said, I was on the other side and my ex actually lived in my current home with my dad while I moved off to work in another state and now has lived about 10 miles away. I would never dream of asking her for the money she was negative in our keep track relationship.