Once upon a time, it was nearly impossible to get divorced. One had to prove extreme abuse, abandonment, infidelity, etc. In our enlightened age, it has become the practice that if two consenting adults, in charge of their own lives and destinies no longer want to be married, the government has no right to stand in their way. Hence, the no fault divorce.
Since it no longer has to be 'proven' that there are grounds for a divorce, why would you bother? Because you are angry and hurt? You want to punish your spouse?
Just for the sake of argument, let's say emails, lie detectors, etc., are all admissable. You can prove in a court of law that your spouse did these terrible, awful things. And you can spend a lot of time, energy and money in the process. At the end of 3 years (not saying it would take that long), you will be divorced. Or, file under irreconcilable differences, divide the debts and assets equitably, and 3 years from now you will be divorced just the same. One difference. You will be thousands of dollars richer (or less in debt) and you will have spent your time and energy focusing on your future instead of the anger and hurt that will deprive only you.
Final note: proof of infidelity does not get you a larger share of assets or a smaller share of the debt. All it will do is make you look like you are being vengeful. Which you are. The point is to get divorced, so do it as quickly and cheaply as possible. Live life well, move on and maintain your dignity. That will be both the only and the best revenge you will get.
