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establishing paternity after paying support for 13 years

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phillyman19103

Junior Member
I currently reside in PA. I have a wife & 2 children in Norwhich, CT.
We got married at a Justice of the Peace 12 or 13 years ago, we lived together for about 3 months and have been seperated since. Around that time two kids were born (2 girls). I waived my paternity test options/rights and have been paying child support since, with no interaction beyond domestic relations with them.

I saw recent pictures of the girls, and now have doubts to whether I am their father. I would like to have paternity established, and aslo find what can be done regarding our current marital status.
anulment/divorce/or is there something else that would be more appropriate for my current situation?
The questions:
If a paternity test resulted in me not being the father of either 1 or both of the girls, what recourse do I have financially and legaly?
Second - Being we virtually never lived as husband & wife is there something other then a divorce we can do to 'erase' this marriage?
I've called the domestic relations office and they pretty much stated paternity has already been established and that I need to find a lawyer. That task is in the works as well. But seeking preliminary information.
 


stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Wow. You're a real stand-up guy, aren't ya? The chances of your disestablishing paternity are, by now, nil unless someone else contests it (i.e. another guy). And don't think you're going to be able to file for custody and get the girls to avoid paying support, either.
 
Are your girls twins? I'm trying to understand how else you could have conceived two children in only the 3 months that you claim you lived with your wife of 13 years.
 

CJane

Senior Member
Are your girls twins? I'm trying to understand how else you could have conceived two children in only the 3 months that you claim you lived with your wife of 13 years.
Thank you! Me too.

But they can't be twins unless I'm really unaware of basic biology (and I assure you, I am not) because he said "One or both".
 

xylene

Senior Member
Do you have any genetic problems - or fear that you do ;);) (HINT HINT WINK WINK)

You would really want to make sure the girls don't have them (HINT HINT)

You could make mom so worried she might not even fess up. or agree to a genetic test... (WINK WINK)
 

CJane

Senior Member
Do you have any genetic problems - or fear that you do ;);) (HINT HINT WINK WINK)

You would really want to make sure the girls don't have them (HINT HINT)

You could make mom so worried she might not even fess up. or agree to a genetic test... (WINK WINK)

Even if he establishes himself as the non-bio father, he's legally the father by nature of the fact he was married to mom at the time of the births and has been paying CS for 12 years.

He's not gonna get off the hook.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Thank you! Me too.

But they can't be twins unless I'm really unaware of basic biology (and I assure you, I am not) because he said "One or both".
Its actually possible for fraternal twins to have different fathers....incredibly rare and incredibly unusual, but possible.
 

nextwife

Senior Member
Its actually possible for fraternal twins to have different fathers....incredibly rare and incredibly unusual, but possible.

Yes, it is possible and has happened.

It is also possible for a person born as a single to have been a twin during early pregnancy. There is something that happens very early that causes one twin to be absorbed into the cells forming the other twin, resulting in one person carrying more than one DNA.

They are called chimeras.

http://www.katewerk.com/chimera.html

http://www.gender.org.uk/about/04embryo/43_comt1.htm

http://www.medterms.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=8905
 

milspecgirl

Senior Member
you have been the legal father all this time- and still are. a judge is not going to let you out of it now unless the bio dad shows up and wants to establish
 

nextwife

Senior Member
you have been the legal father all this time- and still are. a judge is not going to let you out of it now unless the bio dad shows up and wants to establish
IMHO, while dad should still be dad, moms who commit paternity fraud should still be liable for having created and committed that fraud.

In our zest to look out for the kids, we forget that we are denying them their biofather and creating a legal fiction, all because mom cheated, then lied. And their biofather is being cheated of their child. And their biofathers, parents, their grandchild, and the biofathers kids, are cheated of their sibling.

For all we know, these scenarios may actually cost another child their LIFE, because, if a sibling needed a bone marrow donor, the siblings wouldn't even KNOW they had a donor sibling from which they may have found a marrow match- because mom found it more useful to her to lie..

When mom creates a paternity fraud, there are more issues here than whether we, as a society, can still get money out of dad as a reward for keeping her lie a secret long enough.

Maybe if there were SERIOUS consequences for perpetrators, fewer moms would be inclined to pull this crap.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
I currently reside in PA. I have a wife & 2 children in Norwhich, CT.
We got married at a Justice of the Peace 12 or 13 years ago, we lived together for about 3 months and have been seperated since. Around that time two kids were born (2 girls). I waived my paternity test options/rights and have been paying child support since, with no interaction beyond domestic relations with them.
As the husband of the mother you had no paternity test rights. You were automatically placed on the birth certificate and automatically the legal father.


I saw recent pictures of the girls, and now have doubts to whether I am their father.
Nice. But pictures tell you something. Quite frankly even if you have their blood and are biologically related you don't strike me as a "real" father anyway. So rest assured, the only thing you are attempting to save yourself is your pocketbook.

I would like to have paternity established, and aslo find what can be done regarding our current marital status.
Paternity IS established. You want paternity disestablished which will not happen UNLESS there is another alleged biological father out there that comes forward to press the issue. As for your marital status you could get a divorce.


anulment/divorce/or is there something else that would be more appropriate for my current situation?
Divorce.
The questions:
If a paternity test resulted in me not being the father of either 1 or both of the girls, what recourse do I have financially and legaly?
None.

Second - Being we virtually never lived as husband & wife is there something other then a divorce we can do to 'erase' this marriage?

Nope. Because if you have children then you have "lived as husband & wife". And legally the two of you have children.

I've called the domestic relations office and they pretty much stated paternity has already been established and that I need to find a lawyer. That task is in the works as well. But seeking preliminary information.
And that is because paternity was established. You need a lawyer.
 

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