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four year separation, tired of waiting

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nyghtofshadows

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Pennsylvania

First I think a little back story would be a good idea. In 2003 I was involved with a military guy when he was told he was going to be sent to Iraq. Of course looking back on it I can see we only married because we were afraid and panicked at the thought of him being overseas. But in any case, we married and about two and a half months later, while he was in Wisconsin waiting to be deployed he came up with some crazy excuse that I hadn't been faithful, and declared that he wanted to get a divorce. Now, he's since admitted that the real reason he wanted to get divorced was because he was afraid of being tied down at 21. But at the time I insisted that he take care of it. That was four years ago. Some of it has been both because of a lack of finances and also because for a good while neither of us cared.

Now, both of us have moved on and are in serious relationships with other people. And I am tired of waiting for him to get his act together and do it.

All in all this is a very simple thing, there's no children, no property, no debts, we haven't even shared an address since the first two months of our marriage.

I cannot believe that there is no information about getting this taken care of simply. If anyone has any ideas, please, let me know.

The other thing is that I'm a single mom, (to a different guy) and simple do not have the hundreds of dollars needed to pay for lawyers, and court fees, etc...

All I'm looking for is a way to have a paper signed by the both of us saying that the marriage was a mistake, and it never should have happened in the first place.

If anyone has any information I'll be eternally grateful.
 


nyghtofshadows

Junior Member
that's a great link but i don't have 50 dollars i can just spend like that. maybe if things change.

Does anybody have any clue about legal aid that doesn't require domestic violence to be the reason for the divorce??
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
that's a great link but i don't have 50 dollars i can just spend like that. maybe if things change.

Does anybody have any clue about legal aid that doesn't require domestic violence to be the reason for the divorce??
Take yourself down to your local courthouse and ask for the forms to file for divorce....and simply do it. You will have to serve your soon to be ex, and since there is nothing to fight about its unlikely that he will contest it.
 

nyghtofshadows

Junior Member
Actually i've already been to the courthouse. both the one in the county i was married and the one in the county i live in. Both have said the same thing, "Look in the law library" but they won't tell me what I need. Only to just go "look it up". The courthouse in the county i was married in at least gave me the number to legal aid but as I said in the first reply I made, they won't help me unless he was abusive, which he wasn't.

I swear the systems just want people in desperate situations to stay married whether they like it or not. *sighs* thanks for the idea though.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
And you will need a filing fee. Unless you can convince them to let you file for nothing (which could be possible depending on if they will accept a proper affidavit).
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
that's a great link but i don't have 50 dollars i can just spend like that. maybe if things change.

Does anybody have any clue about legal aid that doesn't require domestic violence to be the reason for the divorce??
Huh? :confused: It IS a great link, and I don't know what $50 you're talking about, unless it's a filing fee. I went through some of the links on that page, and nothing asked for money. You can do this pro-se.

And if you've been separated for 4 years, want a divorce, and don't have the $$ for the filing fee/s, I don't think you want to be divorced. :rolleyes:
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Huh? :confused: It IS a great link, and I don't know what $50 you're talking about, unless it's a filing fee. I went through some of the links on that page, and nothing asked for money. You can do this pro-se.

And if you've been separated for 4 years, want a divorce, and don't have the $$ for the filing fee/s, I don't think you want to be divorced. :rolleyes:
HEY I GAVE A HINT ON WHAT SHE COULD DO IF SHE DOESN'T have the filing fee. Doesn't anyone listen to me anymore?????:(
 

Golfball

Member
Actually i've already been to the courthouse. both the one in the county i was married and the one in the county i live in. Both have said the same thing, "Look in the law library" but they won't tell me what I need. Only to just go "look it up".
Well, they can't tell you which form you need, that could constitute giving legal advice, which they can't give.

The courthouse in the county i was married in at least gave me the number to legal aid but as I said in the first reply I made, they won't help me unless he was abusive, which he wasn't.

I swear the systems just want people in desperate situations to stay married whether they like it or not. *sighs* thanks for the idea though.
You're probably going to have spend some money sometime, the courts (or attorneys) do not usually work for free.
 

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