Help! Need advice fast

[lefthighanddry]

What is the name of your state? TX and CA

I've posted this also in Child Custody forum but haven't received any response and since this does have to do with the divorce procedure, I am posting here as well and hope someone will know the answers to my questions.

My friend's wife lives in California, where he and their two girls used to live. He moved to Texas for relocation in June of this year. By mutual consent, the girls are living with him in Texas since August of this year and are attending Texas schools. They have been separated since Feb. of 2000 and at that time, the wife moved out and they split custody of the girls, the dad getting them 57% of the time to her 43%. He remained in the family home.
She has filed for divorce and on her UCCJEA it states that the minor children have lived with her at her apartment for the last 5 years up until present. It does not state anything about the girls living with him in California (57%) or about them presently living in Texas. She's currently trying to get custody, etc., but that may be worked out between the two of them. She has an attorney who should know better. Does this constitute fraud? My other question is when he files his response, does he send in the correct UCCJEA form for California or send a Texas UCCJEA or both? I know this form has to do with the court that has jurisdiction over the minor children and I know it's important for the courts to have correct information as to where they actually have lived and are living.

Please, anyone with knowledge about child custody cases, UCCJEA and two states involved, please respond.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? TX and CA

I've posted this also in Child Custody forum but haven't received any response and since this does have to do with the divorce procedure, I am posting here as well and hope someone will know the answers to my questions.

My friend's wife lives in California, where he and their two girls used to live. He moved to Texas for relocation in June of this year. By mutual consent, the girls are living with him in Texas since August of this year and are attending Texas schools. They have been separated since Feb. of 2000 and at that time, the wife moved out and they split custody of the girls, the dad getting them 57% of the time to her 43%. He remained in the family home.
She has filed for divorce and on her UCCJEA it states that the minor children have lived with her at her apartment for the last 5 years up until present. It does not state anything about the girls living with him in California (57%) or about them presently living in Texas. She's currently trying to get custody, etc., but that may be worked out between the two of them. She has an attorney who should know better. Does this constitute fraud? My other question is when he files his response, does he send in the correct UCCJEA form for California or send a Texas UCCJEA or both? I know this form has to do with the court that has jurisdiction over the minor children and I know it's important for the courts to have correct information as to where they actually have lived and are living.

Please, anyone with knowledge about child custody cases, UCCJEA and two states involved, please respond.

Well, I can tell you this much, the children are still legal residents of CA because they have not lived in TX for six months. Therefore CA would properly have jurisdiction over custody matters. That is part of what the UCCJEA references...which state properly has jurisdiction of custody matters.

She may however have lied by stating that the children lived primarily with her, but not that the children are legal residents of CA.

 

[brisgirl825]

Mom still lives in CA and there are court orders in place in CA correct?

 

[LdiJ]

Mom still lives in CA and there are court orders in place in CA correct?

It almost doesn't matter if there are existing court orders in CA or not. The children haven't lived in TX long enough to be residents there.

 

[lefthighanddry]

Okay, thank you. That answers that question.

So he files the response to the petition and submits his own UCCJEA stating that they lived with both mom and dad and now are living in Texas with dad. Even though this doesn't change jurisdiction, is this important to establish with the courts if they have to have this settled by the courts? I just feel like they're trying to put one over on the court to get a better chance at custody.

 

[brisgirl825]

It almost doesn't matter if there are existing court orders in CA or not. The children haven't lived in TX long enough to be residents there.

Very true...

 

[lefthighanddry]

There are no court orders yet regarding the children, anywhere. I understand about the jurisdiction part. My concern is that she isn't telling the truth about where they have lived for the last 5 years on the UCCJEA when she filed her petition for dissolution. I'm afraid she is trying to say that they lived with her exclusively in Ca for the last five years so that the court will award her custody.

I also want to add that they are trying to work out the aspects of this divorce and she may have only done that because she thought it was going to be a contested divorce and she was going after all that she could. What we want is for this to be what's best for the kids and to try to do this in a civilized manner.

 

[LdiJ]

There are no court orders yet regarding the children, anywhere. I understand about the jurisdiction part. My concern is that she isn't telling the truth about where they have lived for the last 5 years on the UCCJEA when she filed her petition for dissolution. I'm afraid she is trying to say that they lived with her exclusively in Ca for the last five years so that the court will award her custody.

I also want to add that they are trying to work out the aspects of this divorce and she may have only done that because she thought it was going to be a contested divorce and she was going after all that she could. What we want is for this to be what's best for the kids and to try to do this in a civilized manner.

Its understandable however if she now realizes that she doesn't want her children living half of the country away. The UCCJEA part of things only cares what state the children resided in....not which home. However, since there are no court orders regarding the children, it may be difficult to prove that they didn't reside primarily with mom...or at least 50/50.

 

[lefthighanddry]

Well, if she still chooses to fight for custody, can he at least ask the court for temporary custody and child support until it is determined? What forms would be needed for this?

Currently she is not paying any child support and based on the numbers I ran through a child support calculator for CA, he is entitled to a little bit. She did pay for the girls to come visit for Thanksgiving week (they are currently there) and we paid for them to visit at Christmas for two weeks.

 

[LdiJ]

Well, if she still chooses to fight for custody, can he at least ask the court for temporary custody and child support until it is determined? What forms would be needed for this?

Currently she is not paying any child support and based on the numbers I ran through a child support calculator for CA, he is entitled to a little bit. She did pay for the girls to come visit for Thanksgiving week (they are currently there) and we paid for them to visit at Christmas for two weeks.

I think that you really need to consult with an attorney. You mentioned on your other thread that the children would most likely prefer to live in CA with mom....and that definitely complicates things.

 

[lefthighanddry]

Yes, I agree, that does complicate things, but like I said in my other post, it would be for all the wrong reasons. And they are making friends here and getting settled in their new life, so that may be a mute point by the time this is settled. We're waiting to hear back from her regarding this child custody issue and a property settlement issue that they agreed on just after she filed the petition (we didn't know she had filed until he communicated with her that he was willing to offer her what she suggested and she said yes, but told him petition was already on it's way). She has since signed a property settlement agreement and returned this to us. This may not be valid in court, but it does show good faith on her part.

We have always been able to work things out with her to some extent and she admitted she was stressed (money problems, I think) when she filed. She tends to be emotional and react to her emotions, but when we stay reasonable and calm in dealing with her, she usually rethinks things and comes to pretty much the same conclusion that we do. I think now that she is expecting some money to come her way soon, she will be more willing to be agreeable and work all this out with us.

Depending on whether she still wants custody, will dictate on whether we hire an attorney, I guess. We really would rather not go to that expense, if we don't need to. I used to work in an attorney's office, so I am trying my best to find the forms needed and information that is required in handling this. I also know that if there is a fight, we would be better served by hiring someone with a lot more knowledge than myself. She told us that she was telling her attorney that they already came to an agreement and that she didn't need to file all the other stuff (spousal support, custody, child support, half of his pension) and wish she hadn't gone to the expense of going that route.

Any information that anyone can provide on the best course of action would be appreciated. (Other than hiring an attorney, because I will know when it's over my head).

 

[brisgirl825]

You realize that if dad were to retain custody, he would likely be responsible for all transportation costs assocaited with mom's visitation.

Did I understand you correctly that the children are currently with mom for Thanksgiving Holiday?

 

[lefthighanddry]

Yes, we understand that. Unless, of course, we can stipulate that mom does not have to pay child support, but will provide for transportation.

Yes, they are currently visiting mom in California for the Thanksgiving holiday and will do so again at Christmas. In essence, we are giving up being able to spend the holidays with them so far. They have a grandma (dad's mom) that lives in Las Vegas that they will not be able to see for a while, unless we can arrange for grandma to visit us. We don't know of any other way to make this as painless as possible.

 

[brisgirl825]

Yes, we understand that. Unless, of course, we can stipulate that mom does not have to pay child support, but will provide for transportation.

Yes, they are currently visiting mom in California for the Thanksgiving holiday and will do so again at Christmas. In essence, we are giving up being able to spend the holidays with them so far. They have a grandma (dad's mom) that lives in Las Vegas that they will not be able to see for a while, unless we can arrange for grandma to visit us. We don't know of any other way to make this as painless as possible.

I wouldn't be surprised if the children don't return to dad. He should have taken care of this in CA.

This is a mess.

 

[lefthighanddry]

I understand that some people may use that tactic, but I don't think that will happen in this case.

Even if she is missing them more than she realized she would and now wants custody, that doesn't mean she would do something stupid. If this can't be resolved, then this will be fought out in the courts. She may end up getting custody or he may, but one parent isn't going to do something like that. Even if they have led separate lives for the last 5 1/2 years, they have always worked out what happens to the kids between them. Remember, she agreed to let them come to Texas with him and all agreed to try this out and see how it worked.

After reading a lot of the posts on this website, I understand what some people will go through in these situations, but don't believe it applies here.