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  1. 01-23-2007, 01:57 PM #1
    pattiebh
    pattiebh is offline Junior Member
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    Unhappy I think I am being misled by my husband

    What is the name of your state? CA
    I am 32 and have been married to my husband for 8 years, we have 2 small children, 4 and 6.
    I did not work for 4 years while my children were younger. I have now started a new job, less than 6 months. My husband, told me he no longer loves me. I got depressed, I saw a doctor and the doctor put me on anti-depressants, now my husband keeps telling me that I am crazy and that I will lose my children if I cause any problems. I and my children are now living with my parents. My husband does not want me to file for divorce. He says that if I do, I am going to "screw" things up for him. He wants us to be civil. In the meantime, he is removing my name from all our bank accounts, and his medical insurance. A friend told me I should be concerned. That my husband is trying to cheat me out of any type of support or settlement. I thought he was watching out for me and our children. I don't have money for an attorney. I need to find an apartment, and the one car we had in our family, my husband kept. I don't know what to do. I am now scared that I was dumb to believe him and now there is nothing I can do to get any type of settlement or support from him for me and my kids. I am working, but it is not a job that pays much money since I was out of work taking care of my children and I do not have a college education. Is it too late, now that he has removed me from bank accounts and is in the process of removing me from medical insurance, to be able to get a reasonable settlement for me and our children? No one has filed for divorce yet.
    Also, do you have any ideas where I can find an attorney that will take this case for not too much money. I can use any advice from your experiences.What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?
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  3. 01-23-2007, 02:04 PM #2
    seniorjudge
    seniorjudge is offline Senior Member
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    Your husband is having an affair.

    Contact these folks for a cheap lawyer:

    [url]http://calbar.ca.gov/state/calbar/calbar_generic.jsp?cid=12642&id=3561[/url]
    There are two rules for success:

    (1) Never tell everything you know.
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  4. 01-23-2007, 02:29 PM #3
    pattiebh
    pattiebh is offline Junior Member
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    Unhappy No affair

    I think if he was having an affair. He has asked me back a few times, i don't want to go back with him because, after saying he no longer loves me, what is the point, and he thinks that I am seeing someone because he keeps calling to check up on me, at work or home. If i am late he will be calling non stop. I have to put my boss, or his wife on the phone to let him know that I am still working. Can you please send me the website again. I tried to cut and paste and it did not work
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  5. 01-23-2007, 02:36 PM #4
    seniorjudge
    seniorjudge is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by pattiebh View Post
    I think if he was having an affair. He has asked me back a few times, i don't want to go back with him because, after saying he no longer loves me, what is the point, and he thinks that I am seeing someone because he keeps calling to check up on me, at work or home. If i am late he will be calling non stop. I have to put my boss, or his wife on the phone to let him know that I am still working. Can you please send me the website again. I tried to cut and paste and it did not work
    Google

    california state bar pro bono
    There are two rules for success:

    (1) Never tell everything you know.
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  6. 01-23-2007, 02:45 PM #5
    moburkes
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    He cannot remove you from his medical insurance until open enrollment, and, even then, the company will ask for proof that you have other coverage, or proof that you are no longer married.
    My new signature:
    Originally Posted by arazi
    I'll take you on one-to-one in a volcabulary test anywhere, anyplace, anytime.
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  7. 01-23-2007, 02:53 PM #6
    Silverplum
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    Quote Originally Posted by pattiebh View Post
    Can you please send me the website again. I tried to cut and paste and it did not work
    Try it without the [url] part on each end of the link. (That's something automatically added by this site.)
    Last edited by Silverplum; 01-23-2007 at 04:20 PM.
    “I will provide our law enforcement agencies with the tools they need to track and take out the terrorists without undermining our Constitution and our freedom. That means no more national security letters to spy on citizens who are not suspected of a crime. No more tracking citizens who do nothing more than protest a misguided war. No more ignoring the law when it is inconvenient. That is not who we are. And it is not what is necessary to defeat the terrorists.” ― bama
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  8. 01-23-2007, 04:18 PM #7
    tnrentee
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    I'm sorry to say, but it surely sounds like he's having an affair...I've been through the same thing twice and each time it ended in them having an affair. I'm not totally sure about CA, but I don't think he can take you off the bank account right away. If so. he definitely can't leave you without money for the kids. He's still financially responsible for those children and he still have have carry insurance. Some attorneys will have a payment plan. I would definitely file for divorce and get the ball rolling ASAP! Best of luck to you!
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  9. 01-23-2007, 04:23 PM #8
    Silverplum
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    Very supportive, but NOT "legal" info at all. Some of what you wrote is downright untrue.

    Quote Originally Posted by tnrentee View Post
    I'm sorry to say, but it surely sounds like he's having an affair...I've been through the same thing twice and each time it ended in them having an affair. I'm not totally sure about CA, but I don't think he can take you off the bank account right away. If so. he definitely can't leave you without money for the kids. He's still financially responsible for those children and he still have have carry insurance. Some attorneys will have a payment plan. I would definitely file for divorce and get the ball rolling ASAP! Best of luck to you!
    “I will provide our law enforcement agencies with the tools they need to track and take out the terrorists without undermining our Constitution and our freedom. That means no more national security letters to spy on citizens who are not suspected of a crime. No more tracking citizens who do nothing more than protest a misguided war. No more ignoring the law when it is inconvenient. That is not who we are. And it is not what is necessary to defeat the terrorists.” ― bama
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  10. 01-23-2007, 05:52 PM #9
    Ohiogal
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    Quote Originally Posted by moburkes View Post
    He cannot remove you from his medical insurance until open enrollment, and, even then, the company will ask for proof that you have other coverage, or proof that you are no longer married.
    Actually that is not necessarily true because you do not have to carry a spouse on medical insurance. They would have to be removed during open enrollment however depending on the plan.
    Parents should remember 3 things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex; when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death; your children determine what type of nursing home you end up in.
    Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship.

    Attorney-GAL in Ohio.

    I've removed the knife from my back, polished it, and will one day return it -- long after you think I have forgotten.
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  11. 01-24-2007, 07:15 AM #10
    moburkes
    moburkes is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ohiogal View Post
    Actually that is not necessarily true because you do not have to carry a spouse on medical insurance. They would have to be removed during open enrollment however depending on the plan.
    You're correct. There is no law. However, most companies will not remove a spouse without inquiring first or verifying other coverage.
    My new signature:
    Originally Posted by arazi
    I'll take you on one-to-one in a volcabulary test anywhere, anyplace, anytime.
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