What is the name of your state? Illinois
Here is a little background - after 9 year marriage I filed for divorce we have 3 children 5, 9, 14 and my 88 year old grandmother lives with me. The divorce has taken almost 2 years because my ex-husb attorney likes to file unending motions and the ex than fails to show to court. Well, finally last week I received my divorce. During the marriage I made more than my ex but he always was employed making around 60K - until the divorce now he is unemployed and doing seasonal work for a department store making min wage. At the time of the trial the ex was living on his credit cards and living with his mother. During the divorce I have been supporting the children and paying all bills in my name and joint including mortgages etc. Well, the judges decision was to give me all the debt - even the debt that the ex has been incurring and all debt even in his name alone. Additonally I am being forced to sell the home he gets 70%, give him 50% of my retirement and our investments, and the icing on the cake, the judge has awarded no child support - there has been none even while the divorce was pending, and he has reserved alimony for the ex for 12 months so that "he can see how I do this year with my bonus and options and salary" expecting the ex to take me back to court numerous times in 2005. I have to continue to notify the ex if I get a raise, bonus or options. Additionally the judge reserved attorney fees - my ex owes his over 35k and they want me to pay. My attorney states that he is sure the other attorney is going to appeal, but they can't appeal if items in the judgement are reserved, which they are. So since the judge gave 12 months on reserve, they may not appeal for another year. Which would then tie me up for another 12 months.
All that said, here are my concerns... 1) has anyone else been in a situation similar to this? 2) I want to remarry and am being told I can't because than my new husbands income will count to alimony for my ex?? How do you work around this? 3) I feel like I am being held captive by this situation and don't see how this can be legal?
Any insight or advice would be appreciated.
Here is a little background - after 9 year marriage I filed for divorce we have 3 children 5, 9, 14 and my 88 year old grandmother lives with me. The divorce has taken almost 2 years because my ex-husb attorney likes to file unending motions and the ex than fails to show to court. Well, finally last week I received my divorce. During the marriage I made more than my ex but he always was employed making around 60K - until the divorce now he is unemployed and doing seasonal work for a department store making min wage. At the time of the trial the ex was living on his credit cards and living with his mother. During the divorce I have been supporting the children and paying all bills in my name and joint including mortgages etc. Well, the judges decision was to give me all the debt - even the debt that the ex has been incurring and all debt even in his name alone. Additonally I am being forced to sell the home he gets 70%, give him 50% of my retirement and our investments, and the icing on the cake, the judge has awarded no child support - there has been none even while the divorce was pending, and he has reserved alimony for the ex for 12 months so that "he can see how I do this year with my bonus and options and salary" expecting the ex to take me back to court numerous times in 2005. I have to continue to notify the ex if I get a raise, bonus or options. Additionally the judge reserved attorney fees - my ex owes his over 35k and they want me to pay. My attorney states that he is sure the other attorney is going to appeal, but they can't appeal if items in the judgement are reserved, which they are. So since the judge gave 12 months on reserve, they may not appeal for another year. Which would then tie me up for another 12 months.
All that said, here are my concerns... 1) has anyone else been in a situation similar to this? 2) I want to remarry and am being told I can't because than my new husbands income will count to alimony for my ex?? How do you work around this? 3) I feel like I am being held captive by this situation and don't see how this can be legal?
Any insight or advice would be appreciated.