I just got married a few months ago. 4 days before the wedding my husband gave me a pre nup. We went back and fourth with it and and I finally agreed to sign it. I was overwhelmed and did not seek a lawyer myself. We just went with his. I live in his home and drive a car he gave to me. BUT.. the prenup states that the house we live in, the car I drive, HIS car he drives, and the other car we have.. and also the lake house all stay in his name only. He even went so far as to put the tv's in the house under the pre nup. We do not have a joint bank account either. He said once we move out of this house we will put the other in both our names. My concern is if something happens to him.. I am left with no home and not even a car for myself and my kids that I brought into this marriage. How can I protect myself if he were to die or even make myself have something to fall on if we did get a divorce? I love him and of course do not anticipate a divorce but I feel like I have not protected myself and my kids. I have no assets either. I sold my car and moved out of the house I was renting and moved into his. We live in the state of Missouri
-
FreeAdvice has a new Terms of Service and Privacy Policy, effective May 25, 2018.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our Terms of Service and use of cookies.
married, signed a pre nup and I have nothing under my name
- Thread starter genco30
- Start date
Accident - Bankruptcy - Criminal Law / DUI - Business - Consumer - Employment - Family - Immigration - Real Estate - Tax - Traffic - Wills Please click a topic or scroll down for more.
I just got married a few months ago. 4 days before the wedding my husband gave me a pre nup. We went back and fourth with it and and I finally agreed to sign it. I was overwhelmed and did not seek a lawyer myself. We just went with his. I live in his home and drive a car he gave to me. BUT.. the prenup states that the house we live in, the car I drive, HIS car he drives, and the other car we have.. and also the lake house all stay in his name only. He even went so far as to put the tv's in the house under the pre nup. We do not have a joint bank account either. He said once we move out of this house we will put the other in both our names. My concern is if something happens to him.. I am left with no home and not even a car for myself and my kids that I brought into this marriage. How can I protect myself if he were to die or even make myself have something to fall on if we did get a divorce? I love him and of course do not anticipate a divorce but I feel like I have not protected myself and my kids. I have no assets either. I sold my car and moved out of the house I was renting and moved into his. We live in the state of MissouriProserpina
Senior Member
The timing of the prenup and the fact that you signed it without legal counsel might be enough to invalidate even without considering any other elements.
There are many things a prenup can't do, particularly if it threatens to go against state law. It might not be a bad idea to take a copy to an attorney to review the agreement - it won't cost an extortionate amount of money and might give you some piece of mind.
Love is a many-splendored thing,
It's the April rose that only grows in the early spring,
Love is nature's way of giving a reason to be living,
The golden crown that makes a man a king.
Once on a high and windy hill,
In the morning mist two lovers kissed and the world stood still,
Then your fingers touched my silent heart and taught it how to sing,
Yes, true love's a many-splendored thing.
Proserpina
Senior Member
You have kids from another relationship. Don't allow yourself to be totally dependent!!!!
SOOO: start earning money yourself, saving yourself into your own checking and saving and retirement, buying your own cars and so on. Don't put yourself in the position of being totally dependent on him. Be an equal financial partner in the marriage and then this is a non-issue.
Last edited:
LdiJ
Senior Member
Point out to your husband that what he is doing protects himself now, but puts you at quite a bit of risk if he were to get killed in a car accident or something similar. Suggest that he consider some life insurance with you as the beneficiary so that he can leave the rest of his property to whomever he likes.
And follow Nextwife's advice as well. It would be a great time to go to school as well, if you don't already have a college education.
The one (of many things perhaps) that comes to mind is if the pre-nup didnt carry full disclosure by either side for financial assets. Usually the agreement is signed in front of witness's ( usually each sides attorneys'). Although the poster did state that she waived that right to legal advisal.
The prenup and all financials would be filed commonly at the court house.
Had the prenup been reviewed to make sure its valid and contains all matters that both willingly agreed to? Four days prior to the wedding date is not enough time to seek proper advisal.... postpone of the wedding or various clauses would have helped to gain equal ground when negotiating this type of contract.
I would recommend at least taking this document to a lawyer for advisal. Just because its signed doesn't always make it legal/binding.
The prenup and all financials would be filed commonly at the court house.
Had the prenup been reviewed to make sure its valid and contains all matters that both willingly agreed to? Four days prior to the wedding date is not enough time to seek proper advisal.... postpone of the wedding or various clauses would have helped to gain equal ground when negotiating this type of contract.
I would recommend at least taking this document to a lawyer for advisal. Just because its signed doesn't always make it legal/binding.
oh honey...do seek to have it reviewed...and(even though some women pretend we men don't know about it), most "smart" women have "mad money" SOMEWHERE...my wife acts like i don't know she has 2k in a bank account under her name with our hold bank...and she acts like i don't know her 1st husband is beneficiary on that account...but i do know, she's told me...it's one of those "dont ask, dont tell" things...and i know why it's there...and it's not for a family vacation she's also got one of those walmart money cards, that has another 500 on it for emergency purposes.
get some part time work, ANYTHING, to start putting money away...put it into a college fund...and then go to college...you need to bring yourself up to living standards, especially since you have kids from another relationship...although, as a man, if i threw a prenup at my wife 4 DAYS before our wedding, i'd have something shady up my sleeve...usually another girlfriend...and she'd have probably knocked the crap out of me, and packed herself off...on her own dime as she puts it
she's also got one of those walmart money cards, that has another 500 on it for emergency purposes.get some part time work, ANYTHING, to start putting money away...put it into a college fund...and then go to college...you need to bring yourself up to living standards, especially since you have kids from another relationship...although, as a man, if i threw a prenup at my wife 4 DAYS before our wedding, i'd have something shady up my sleeve...usually another girlfriend...and she'd have probably knocked the crap out of me, and packed herself off...on her own dime as she puts it
Yes by all means OP should go to school on her new hubby's dime, be a good little girl for a few years and if divorce should rear its ugly head, just threaten alimony and he keeps the school bill.
OP can then draw on all the knowledge she got from school and find another sugar daddy. We both know OP won't use it in the workplace!!
Last edited:
justalayman
Senior Member
why do you say this? This is a pre-nup, not a will. If he dies with no will, the estate is divided per the laws of intestate succession of your state.
If there is a will, it is divided per the will.
as well, even with a pre-nup, there are marital assets to be considered which include the appreciation of real property
Proserpina
Senior Member
And a prenup cannot usurp State divorce/property regulations.
mistoffolees
Senior Member
Well, no. But a pre-nup CAN control property settlement in a divorce, as long as it falls within what is allowed by law.
Of course, in this case, much of it is a non-issue at this point. She's talking about property that he had before the marriage and she wouldn't have any share in most of it if she got divorced even without a prenup (or, at least, her share would be tiny after just a few months).
No one here knows what the pre-nup says. It very well MIGHT address estate issues. OTOH, it could simply state that the stuff he had when he got married is his separate property and anything acquired during the marriage is marital (which is the way it would have worked without a pre-nup, but some people like to have it in writing). It is useless to speculate on what it says or what it means. She needs to either explain what the relevant parts of the pre-nup say or, preferably, take it to an attorney who can address both what the pre-nup says AND whether it is valid when signed just before the wedding without counsel.
I am going to take this to another lawyer to have it reviewed. That is the best advice I have seen here and thank you for all the other advice as well. Basically I went into this marrige with myself and my kids and that is it. I gave up my car and home which I was just renting the home. The pre nup mostly stated that everything he brought into the marriage remains his and anything we accumulate after while be "shared". Now he tells me that he does not have a will, but he has put me on his life insurance. I just felt rushed and crazied to be given this 4 days before wth everything paid for and planned for the wedding. I did not agree to the section he had written up stating that I could not seek alimony. I had his lawyer change that. I just feel i screwed myself without thinking or having time to think. I did not talk to anyone about this before and still now. I need to have this looked at
mistoffolees
Senior Member
Definitely check with an attorney, but it sounds like the prenup isn't really going to do much. Under most state laws, the things that he brought into the marriage remain his and things accumulated during the marriage are shared, even if you didn't sign a prenup.
If you were renting a home, then you didn't give anything up - at least in terms of assets. Basically, you came into the marriage with nothing and will begin accumulating things as a married couple. Nothing particularly nefarious there.
If he dies without a will, the estate distribution determines how the assets will be distributed.
First thing that will happen is that you will get his life insurance money. You will also be able to stay in the house until the court orders otherwise. Then they'll split up all the other assets.
The will isn't NECESSARY since the state will determine how things are split, but it IS a really good idea to have one. First, he may want to distribute his assets differently than the state would do so. Second, it will take longer without a will and is more likely to be challenged.
As for waiving alimony, I'm not sure that would have been binding even if you had signed it. The court reserves the right to set alimony and I suspect that any agreement you reach on the matter is not binding until the court approves it.
While it's certainly scary and your husband was probably not very tactful in how he handled this, it's not clear that he set out to cheat you. It could have been as simple as him not understanding that his separate property would remain separate even after you married (as long as it wasn't comingled).
I would suggest that you have your meeting with an attorney. THEN, I would suggest that both of you sit down with a good financial planner to help you understand what you have, what you need in the event either of you dies, how you're going to handle finances, retirement, education, etc., etc., etc. It will cost you a little bit of money, but the peace of mind will make it worthwhile (plus, you might learn something that will help you to make smarter decisions going forward).
Find the Right Lawyer for Your Legal Issue!
Fast, Free, and Confidential
data-ad-format="auto">